Dating

crowexplorer · 2021-11-04T22:54:04+00:00

There will come a time when you don't give a damn what she's doing or who she's with. You'll wonder why you ever cared at all.

But personally, what I did to get past this type of thing is go out and get laid. I was in no mental state to go on a date or meet women at the bar, so I headed over to the local asian massage parlor, they offer full service for $150.

I felt a thousand times better about everything after that. If you can spare a four day weekend I would suggest heading down to Mexico where prostitution is legal, I was just down in Cancun in August, it was about $75 usd for full service, I saw a couple while I was there, one of them was legit the hottest woman I have been with in my life.

Enjoy your freedom man!

MrKatUK · 2021-11-04T22:40:00+00:00

Chill brother

If she told you she’s going on a date, she’s probably doing it to get under your skin.

As hard as it sounds, don’t let it get to you. You do you.

Carry on as normal. Don’t react. As hard as it may be. It gets easier bro. Trust me.

bslichy · 2021-11-05T00:13:16+00:00

Soon someone else will be dealing with her bs. But it does suck. Will get easier over time. Just be sure to take care of yourself.

TheJacka_lope · 2021-11-04T23:25:20+00:00

It gets better. My wife could run a train on the Edmonton Oilers and I would sleep like a baby.

Adorable_FecalSpray · 2021-11-04T23:26:59+00:00

I know it can hurt man, but what I really want to know is what does your workout tonight look like? I find that working out really helps with those feelings of anger.

redveinlover · 2021-11-05T04:47:54+00:00

The sooner you can accept that she isn’t yours anymore and she didn’t take your vows seriously, the sooner you will be able to move on with your life and make positive changes. Yes it hurts and and I went through it all too. Things will get better sooner than you think.

SwamiSweatSocks · 2021-11-05T00:56:52+00:00

They may play it off but they are jealous too. My ex saw me with a girlfriend in my car and chased my several miles in her car once. I just stay away from her as much as possible. I dont think the divorce gave her her dream come true she saw in her mind.

dday_throwaway3 · 2021-11-04T23:13:11+00:00

Most people lack the resilience to deal with adversity. Over time, they become worn down and eventually defeated. Philosophy offers a way to not only fortify yourself against the hardships of life, but to thrive. Think of philosophy as the operating system running on top of your biological hardware.

Stoicism is a philosophy of life, a practical guide to applying wisdom to your daily choices, focused on living life as a rational being. It is characterized by excellence in judgement and the fulfilled happiness that is to the mind what robust healthy fitness is to the body. Stoics believe that, just as physical pain is caused by illness and injury to the body, human distress is caused by mistaken judgments and incorrect beliefs, particularly about good and bad. Stoicism will prepare you for adversity, allowing you to endure it with equanimity and strength. Stoicism allows you to be the oak tree in the storm, calm and firmly rooted while the world rages around you.

Overcoming problems is more influenced by mindset than skillset. Stoicism does not offer a set of rules of behavior – it is more a mindset that is achieved through engagement with stoical ideas. Imagine a situation that’s troubling you from high above, as though looking down on it from a mountain top:

- Describe upsetting events without any emotive language or value judgements, instead sticking to the facts.

- Ask yourself what someone wise, just, self-disciplined and courageous would do when faced with one of the problems you’re facing. What would my best self do in this situation?

- Picture the longer-term consequences of allowing fear or anger to guide you, versus responding rationally, with greater self-discipline.

- Tell yourself: “It’s not things that upset me, but my opinions about them.”

It’s either up to you, or it isn’t. In short, what the Stoics say is "Work with what you have control of and you'll have your hands full."

Your 'personal attack' perspective is completely up to you. As for revenge, it's the pornography of the weak. You think once people have their comeuppance, then you'll feel better and have closure. No. All the effort you’re putting into reengage could be put into yourself instead to make yourself better. The best revenge is living a better life. Be indifferent.

research002019 · 2021-11-05T01:26:33+00:00

When you throw out an old couch, it's ok if someone picks it up off the curb and uses it right?

I know I'll get down voted, but hang in there man

hecktorshammer · 2021-11-05T02:22:16+00:00

Maddening I know. Get away block her number for a bit. Only contact if concerns are about kids. My ex and I both went crazy. We only keep our kid in mind when speaking now. Still have distasteful thoughts. But as someone said before. Go get laid. She will matter way less. And you will get to laugh everytime she breaks up. Funny when women age their value is less. As men age we increase in value. Amass your resources. We are men that's what we do. The world is in your hands. What is your goal. No one stopping you from achieving. So go do your thing. Play for a bit then work your ass off. Play first to ease your mind. My separation left me so I could not work. So Play first then you will gain focus for them goals.

syro23 · 2021-11-05T04:12:05+00:00

The way to attack is too behave like you don’t give a shit and nothing she does bothers you. Acting like you don’t care will be what drives her mad.

RedPillLense · 2021-11-05T13:26:48+00:00

Act like you don't give a shit! You need to start keeping yourself busy. Go join a gym, join a hiking club (get the "meetup" app) or start a hobby. This too shall pass and if you keep your mind off of her fuckery, you'll be winning. I know it's easier said than done when people you care and love to this to you. Nonetheless, learn to give ZERO fucks!

Basic_Advance7627 · 2021-11-04T22:54:36+00:00

Forget her and you find a great lady to date

Beautiful-Nebula1748 · 2021-11-08T07:08:27+00:00

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Title	Dating
Author	DaveAtlanta
Upvotes	7
Comments	20
Date	November 4, 2021 10:37 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/qmwnv1/dating/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/dating.1085868 https://theredarchive.com/post/1085868

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