Is $25k for Retirement Reasonable?

Zealousideal_Rub5826 · 2025-08-24T03:06:36+00:00

Lawyer: $3000, retirement $25,000. You should lawyer up

WonderBoy56764445 · 2025-08-24T02:50:43+00:00

Thank you for the input everybody.

OctinoxateAndZinc · 2025-08-24T00:01:06+00:00

RCougar · 2025-08-23T23:01:42+00:00

Is that $25k above the split. What is the total in all retirement accounts minus what was in the accounts prior to getting married.

Her argument doesn’t matter at all and is a poor argument in court if you argue against it. The court will normally split the retirement (minus premarital balance) between each of you. She chose not to work and that is on her in the courts eyes, but if you contributed to your 401k while she wasn’t working that could force some to be transferred to her.

What we need to figure out is the value of a fair split compared to what she is offering to you.

Samsquanchiz · 2025-08-23T18:10:45+00:00

I don’t think so. Is she going to pay you back for her half of all the bills she never paid? Then why would you be expected to pay for her ‘lost’ retirement money? Split 50/50 imo and leave it at that.

nosaj-samoht66 · 2025-08-23T16:48:06+00:00

If you were married for more then ten years she get the equivalent of 50% of your SS or hers whichever is higher (this does not impact your SS payments BTW). SS is an entitlement program so that does not make sense to me, on the $7K.

redragtop99 · 2025-08-23T14:51:31+00:00

My ex didn’t take care of anything and asked for over 10X more than yours did…. 6 yet a marriage, no kids, she didn’t contribute anything, slept in late and went out drinking most of the time. Then wanted close to $300k of mine.

Helpful-Paramedic463 · 2025-08-23T13:47:48+00:00

Shit I pay that in alimony a year. I'd take that and run. Be done with her ass.

ImpermanentSelf · 2025-08-23T12:30:04+00:00

What do you make and what are your marital assets? If she had contributed to a 401k you would be entitled to a portion of it (and her a portion of yours).

Seems reasonable on the surface to me though, I have already spent about that much on spousal support and I haven’t even gotten divorced yet. I basically have to support her with 1/3 of my income until we get divorced and figure out the long term arrangement.

Pleasant-Mechanic-49 · 2025-08-23T08:36:43+00:00

Yes very reasonable She's not just throwing a random number out there; she's calculated it based on a real financial

Social Security (~$18k): A teacher making $65k a year pays 6.2% into Social Security.
- $65,000 x 0.062 x 5 years =20K
- Her asking for ~$18k is right in that ballpark.
401k (~$7k): This is where her ask is actually modest.
- Teachers often contribute around 5-8% of their salary to a retirement plan (like a 403b or 401k) +any potential employer match
- lets say 5%-->$65,000 x 0.05 = $3,250 per year x 5 years->16K

You're trying to avoid lawyers, smart move, If you did lawyer up, this conversation would change from "lost retirement" to "spousal support"(???) +"alimony (20K).+Cost of Fighting( easy 10/20K in legal fees)

Next time just avoid a housewife, encourage her to work as much as possible unless u wanna build up again a "financial debt" over your head , it coud have been way worse if you were married for 20 years with a sick wife.

EnvironmentalAd3558 · 2025-08-23T05:00:05+00:00

What is the value of teacher’s retirement package that you gained during marriage? Is she willing to waive any claim to it for the 25k?

You need to know what a judge will give her if it goes to trial. That is why you need a good local divorce attorney to at least advise you on what is likely so that you have an informed basis for any agreement.

ww3historian · 2025-08-23T04:33:02+00:00

That's not how it works. She doesn't get what she should have made. Especially not for social security.

Basically you take your 401k and split it in half. Is the half more or less than 25k?

Fancy-Load-2928 · 2025-08-23T04:26:03+00:00

No one on Reddit can possibly answer that question. You need to ask a lawyer. A one hour consultation could save you from making some really big mistakes.

Title	Is $25k for Retirement Reasonable?
Author	WonderBoy56764445
Upvotes	7
Comments	34
Date	August 23, 2025 4:21 AM UTC (11 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1mxrugd/is_25k_for_retirement_reasonable/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/is-25k-for-retirement-reasonable.1560236 https://theredarchive.com/post/1560236

Comments