Question

Fan_of_Sanity · 2026-08-16T14:50:10+00:00

My STBX initiated, but I’m hoping to maintain a relationship with her family. After all, they were also MY family for nearly 30 years.

They’ve said they want to keep connected to me. I’m taking them at their word.

Outside-Jicama-8468 · 2026-08-16T10:19:24+00:00

I was married almost 21 years. I probably talk to my ex's mom and stepdad more than she does. We have dinner together at the house on a regular basis and play board games with the kids. She helps out with the kids a lot and is a huge support system.

I don't find it weird because they are the kids grandparents. We may talk about her daughter, but I make a point to keep it civil. And I would never push them out of the kids lives because her daughter and I couldn't make it work.

PghSubie · 2026-08-15T23:42:14+00:00

You can't control who she is friends with. Let it go. Your own sanity will thank you

DivorcedDad26 · 2026-08-15T22:06:03+00:00

It all depends.

My STBX and I have been together for 28 years and married for 20. I really enjoy some of her family. However, she cheated on me and has made false DV claims. I wouldn't mind talking to anyone in her family, but I know that my family wants nothing to do with her.

If she had not done those things, I wouldn't have really cared if we stayed in touch with family from the other side. It makes it hard when she attempts to scorch the earth though.

It will be interesting to see where things shake out in 5 or 10 years.

wrxtasy846 · 2026-08-15T22:00:35+00:00

We’ve been separated for 2 years with divorce finalized this summer. Her extended family has stayed in contact with me. She’s close with all of them, and I became fairly close during marriage. Her parents regularly invite me to their beach house for gatherings, and all the extended family members hug me and chat like nothing is different. A handful of aunts and uncles pull me aside and ask if the divorce is going okay, how kids are ect. And offer condolences and advice. I don’t always make it, and It obviously annoys my ex. We But my kids love when I come. Their beach house is extravagant and on the bay, so I love going. I really like that her family still treats me as family.

Nice_General268 · 2026-08-15T21:51:23+00:00

Man, you are not alone. We were married 10 years and now have been separated since April 9, ‘26. She still talks to my parents, goes to breakfast and all that. Don’t think she goes to their house but the phone calls and breakfast is bad enough. No, you are not being ridiculous

upvotersfortruth · 2026-08-15T21:04:51+00:00

No, i mean well yes it's weird but no, it's not unusual.

carnivalbilly · 2026-08-15T20:49:02+00:00

She can be friends with whoever they want. Sometimes they just do it to be a bitch, but sometimes they’re genuine friends….its kinda a case by case thing. If it completely bothers you, you can add in a no contact order in the divorce decree as to them not being able to contact anyone in your family. They’re fairly standard in divorce court and judges grant them all the time.

Any-Neat5158 · 2026-08-15T20:39:14+00:00

Your ex wife, and your family members can be friends with whoever they want. It's not some show of loyalty to just pretend like that person doesn't exist any more.

ProofConnect6521 · 2026-08-15T19:25:06+00:00

It’s a control issue

Gattsama · 2026-08-15T19:10:56+00:00

It's weird and unusual, but not necessarily 100% atypical. It depends on the bonds that were formed and how strong they are. I have zero interaction in contact with the ex's family even though there is a few of them that I was really close to particularly her dad. But I prefer 100% no contact clean brakes since we have no children.

However, in her extended family there are several people that are divorced that still still come to Thanksgiving and Christmas, partly because they have joint custody. The kids, partly because they just bond it like that.

Vintage-Card-Man · 2026-08-15T19:06:12+00:00

It’s weird.

Title	Question
Author	DeerWhisperer1
Upvotes	2
Comments	25
Date	August 15, 2026 7:05 PM UTC (1 day ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1vpb6ze/question/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/question.1633187 https://theredarchive.com/post/1633187

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