UPDATE She cried her eye balls to me, and swore she had nothing to do with missing Wallet and passports, she said she is looking all over the house and that I'm hurting her by accusing, am I going crazy?

I (34 married to a 24) am worried about my marriage. My wife is often moody and tries to control my phone. A few months ago, she broke my expensive TV during a dispute. More recently, my wallet and passports mysteriously went missing the night of a dispute — I’ve never lost them before, and it’s suspicious. When I brought it up, she didn’t admit to anything.

She also threatened to show up at my work over a simple argument. Whenever she does something hurtful, she blames me and never truly takes responsibility.

There’s no physical violence so far, but she grew up with an abusive father, and my gut says something is wrong. Deep down, I feel like I’m waiting for the next blow-up.

Because we’re married, I feel stuck and unsure. Is this abuse? Should I be planning to leave? Looking for outside perspectives.