How do I stop thinking like an incel?

sarafrowns · 2020-04-16T01:40:13+00:00

Try to realize that life isn't black and white. There are spectrums and gray areas. Do you think there isn't a single example of a woman's love in the world? Challenge your own logic. I sometimes worry men are incapable of love, but then I remind myself of an example I have seen in my life - my own grandparents were in love until the end. These examples of love exist out there if you look for them.

Rudd504 · 2020-04-16T00:42:28+00:00

What are some specific thoughts that you have? That would help us narrow down where to begin.

PollyannaSpock · 2020-04-16T02:16:18+00:00

If I were in your situation and had gotten all garbage-brained with woman-hating ideas, first, to help you generate compassion, I’d read about how hard 3rd world women have it with being raped as little girls, often by family, then being blamed for it, and beaten up by husbands, many in arranged marriages, and having to work in sweatshops.

Also, read about how often guys who come into money ditch their older wife who faithfully supported them on his way up, stretched out her body to have his kids and gave up any chance of a career, for a young trophy wife.

And often non-rich guys do that too just because they like younger girls, and they leave their ex in poverty.

Because the reality is that some people just suck - men and women. I’m pretty sure it’s equal for both genders.

Then, if you’re into it, really clean your mind deeply by teaching it to think less negative thoughts (meditation), and read something to make you a better, more evolved and enlightened person, like the book “The Untethered Soul,” or something by Ryan Holiday.

BigDickEnterprise · 2020-04-16T12:21:38+00:00

Make friends with girls, observe how they act and think, draw parallels with your own thinking and thinking of other guys

Also the whole incel thing of girls being sluts does apply to some girls, but far far far from all of them. There are such girls as well, try to avoid those and surround yourself with cool ones, same as you would avoid hanging out with iffy dudes

If you managed to redpill yourself, you can unredpill yourself as well!

Krexington_III · 2020-04-16T12:14:57+00:00

Women are humans. If you had been a woman, and been harassed and taught to fear others the way most women have, you would have also adopted some survival strategy. You might have decided to be openly hostile to men you didn't know - you would then be what the incel brain thinks of as a "bitch". You might seek others who find the system unjust, and band together with them and adopt their group characteristics - you would then be what the feminazi brain thinks of as a "feminazi". You might give up on men and only speak to those you trust personally to a high degree - you would then be what the incel brain thinks of as "frigid". Etc.

Look at female behavior as a set of learned survival strategies. It will all start to make sense to you with time.

spooledheat · 2020-04-16T02:08:45+00:00

Therapy

boyraceruk · 2020-04-16T01:01:23+00:00

The problem is anything that could be reduced to a post would at best be brainwashing of a different colour.

If you ever want to talk stuff through I'd be happy to go through the facts and figures with you.

2020-04-16T13:20:26+00:00

[deleted]

phixlet · 2020-04-16T03:15:20+00:00

One thing I don’t see mentioned here is to start consuming media created by women - books written by women, comics written and drawn by women, visual art made by women. It’s not a simple, quick fix, but it starts to show you a much broader perspective and all sorts of things you never anticipated. Yes, you may be rolling your eyes at a lot of it at the start, but simply looking through someone else’s eyes and seeing all of the facets of life you never noticed can help broaden your perspective.

Twiteena · 2020-04-16T16:06:16+00:00

How old are you now? You should have female friends and coworkers and if you are in college, women should be all around you. Get to know them as people and hear their stories.

Coollogin · 2020-04-16T14:39:29+00:00

Read r/relationships and r/JUSTNOSO.

Jamonde · 2020-04-16T23:21:45+00:00

One thing I needed was counseling. This was well before the COVID-19 pandemic, but as a university student I had free access to on-campus counseling, so I went and just... talked about my problems. My fears, insecurities, why I was struggling in school all of a sudden. What hurt me about a past breakup. What I was scared of. Pretty much everything.

I say this, because we treat going to the doctor for a physical check-up every once in a while like a normal thing that should be part of everyone's life. Why not have the same for our mental health?

Rudd504 · 2020-04-16T18:28:51+00:00

Hey, check out Corey Wayne. He has a very centered and healthy approach to all of this. He’ll get you fixed right up!

Luis_McLovin · 2020-04-16T01:48:44+00:00

Easy.

stop acting like one.

eat healthy, meditate, sleep well, exercise

TeaFaceGuy · 2020-04-16T01:39:32+00:00

You're probably likely to dismiss my advice, but I have been in a similar position, and it's all on you in the end to decide what kind of man you choose to become.

I say: Study the Bible and adopt strict Christian values. Study Stoicism, read Marcus Aurelius. Study Zen Buddhism and Confucianism. Read the great classics, the ancient myths. Gilgamesh. Homer. Open yourself up to traditional wisdom and ethics, but at the same time narrow your focus towards a goal. Not just any goal, mind you, I'm talking something MONUMENTAL. Your life's work.

Become strong - in every sense of the word - and strive for justice. And listen to your conscience, the voice of God, and don't be an impulsive pleasure seeker. Treat women as your sisters and men as your brothers. Respect, love, and honour. Become a strong and kind gentleman, what Confucius would call a 'junzi' (google it, it's something to aspire towards).

I am not saying you need to be religious, but... that is where I myself have landed, have returned to my Catholic roots. Not a Bible-thumper, but I do recognise the strength of a man who carries his own cross and sacrifices himself for the sake of justice and freedom. And that is what the world needs right now, strong men taking responsibility. Strong men helping people. Strong men exercising their virtues. Strong men to lead the world.

It is, in the end, a worthy sacrifice. I choose to sacrifice my self-indulgent ways to pursue what is noble and meaningful. This life of mine MUST mean something!

Title	How do I stop thinking like an incel?
Author	Applesoursoda
Upvotes	31
Comments	99
Date	April 16, 2020 12:38 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/g24le0/how_do_i_stop_thinking_like_an_incel/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/how-do-i-stop-thinking-like-an-incel.653349 https://theredarchive.com/post/653349

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