Redpill ruined the perfect relationship

Naus1987 · 2022-03-04T17:17:51+00:00

It’s not about learning or unlearning ideas. You need to be smart enough to think on your own.

A woman isn’t a mind-game you “play.” She’s a real person with real emotions. Until you’re ready to see other people as human equals — you’ve got a lot of soul searching to do.

actuallyacatmow · 2022-03-04T17:17:30+00:00

I'm sorry this happened. I'm glad you're realising your mistakes. In the future, I'd treat any partners the way you want to be treated. I think for a lot of men overcomplicate what the opposite gender want which is just basic respect and love.

karabnp · 2022-03-05T05:42:10+00:00

Damn, that sucks. Yet, a valuable, painful lesson learned.

If you value someone, let that be felt and known by them.

Life is too short to not be truthful with people.

I’ve never had the heart to game people. I never make an effort to interact with people I don’t actually like and feel interested in. Friends and otherwise, so when people interact with people they don’t actually like, - that’s truly strange to me!!

And then to play a game with someone you actually have feelings for..?? That’s teetering into “Congratulations, you played yourself!!” territory.

Sadly, many men tend to love their ego and pride, more than any woman/women they’ve ever “loved”.

dissonantclear · 2022-03-04T18:45:58+00:00

I’m a woman. Never showing me comfort and never being vulnerable sounds like a potentially abusive relationship to me. It’s a giant red flag, and if I didn’t see those red flags in time to avoid you in the first place, I’d definitely break up, block you online, and maybe change my number once I saw them.

RedPillDetox · 2022-03-04T21:23:17+00:00

Thanks for reaching out, dude. Let me know if you need any help on how to deconstruct specific red pill ideas..

yulemguysmmoja · 2022-03-05T05:02:18+00:00

I unlearned this stuff, it took a while and complete dedication, but I did.

I am happy in a relationship now. I recommend seeing a therapist as soon as possible. I wish someone had told me this earlier. A more affordable website to check first is BetterHelp; that’s where I found a therapist, and my recovery happened quickly.

I wish you well in your recovery, brother; the journey starts now!

Several-Buy5702 · 2022-03-04T20:46:24+00:00

I can emphasize.

The red pill knows how to really exploit mens insecurities about women to get them hooked but instead of addressing those insecurities in a healthy way, they convince you to play these really fucking stupid mind games with women that don't usually work.

And I think it's not supposed to work by design because men aren't going to shell out money for redpill books, lectures, workshops, etc if they have a healthy view of women and relationships.

The best advice I would give to a man who feels like a "beta male" is to learn how to be 100% direct and honest with your romantic intentions with women instead of playing stupid mind games with her AND yourself.

Good luck out there!

pekkauser · 2022-03-05T01:10:04+00:00

I’m really sorry for you man. Contrary to belief, the women you’ll probably want in your life, don’t like that “aloof” shit, most will drop you at a moments notice if you pull that shit, unless she has severely bad attachment issues. If you look at what ACTUAL relationship experts and these Redpill clowns say it’s the total opposite. The actual experts say healthy communication and good chemistry is very necessary, redpill believes you just need to be domineering. I know what’s done is done but if your ever find yourself in a similar situation again, consult actual experts.

Justscrolling133 · 2022-03-04T21:11:01+00:00

Honestly as corny as this advice is, literally treat every partner how you would want to be treated. Obviously with some minor exceptions (I.e you might not want a hug when your upset but your partner might appreciate that).

But my golden rule in life is to do that. Don’t over complicate things. If you would like to be shown compassion and be cared for by a partner, you should do that same.

We are all human and unique. Be yourself and the right person will love you for it. Don’t hide behind this red pill bullshit ❤️

amivar713 · 2022-03-05T01:44:47+00:00

Mind games fuck things up. Period. Never ever play games. A classy, high value person would never entertain that.

Ithrewallofitaway · 2022-03-05T03:55:30+00:00

One thing that I was odds at against other redpillers, was that I believed RedPill poked holes in gender norms that were slanted against men, and those were actual women haters. Yeah, I understand the hate, my ex did me horrible, but that doesn't mean the next will do it.

New-Context831 · 2022-03-04T15:55:25+00:00

Push / pull

You only pushed

Hotlx · 2022-03-05T07:51:33+00:00

It’s about understanding when to use such tactics and when not to women aren’t always there to destroy you, so the no texting for example or telling how you feel is in a way of also testing wether she’s good for you and pushing to what she can handle but not abusing it also such tactics to the extreme only be used for plates you don’t care about

Kismkasm1 · 2022-03-23T13:21:29+00:00

Always keep it real. Say how you feel If she doesn’t feel you then let her walk. But never, ever try to be who you’re not just to pull a woman. Don’t be an actor. If you’re being fake then the act will soon wear off. Attract she who resonates with who you are within.

cortizone · 2022-03-26T09:17:20+00:00

Think of how you would want to be treated

ihate_eggplant · 2022-03-27T14:26:48+00:00

The red-pill did not ruin your relationship. Your game is just bad.

The red-pill is not about being a jerk to women (i.e never texting her, never telling her she's pretty, etc.) You still need to do those things, but don't be excessive about it. Women want attention and validation, its just matter of knowing when to give it to her, and when to back away.

I lost a very good relationship with a girl because I pursued her far too much. Many other women before that weren't interested in me because I loved bombed them and it comes across as needy behavior, and women do not want a needy man.

The red-pill opened my eyes and changed my life. I'm never going back.

Estelwaterbottles · 2022-04-01T06:45:55+00:00

i broke it off with a redpill guy. i mean your best relationship asvice is literally a simple google away yet some people still think they have to find hidden information to get to the golden relationship. you can literally google whats the most important things in a relationship and i bet almost all of them will mention some type of vulnerability which redpill men are completely closed off too. im now with a guy who shares everything with me now. i can ask him anything in the world and he will tell me.

realboujee · 2022-04-10T11:51:12+00:00

Bro, Sounds like you had 'Oneitis' for that girl. I'm disappointed in you dude 🤨. You failed and you Didnt get back up, Your response was to try to spit out the Red Pill (Not Possible, you have already digested the Truth of how women work). Do Better, And Try Again. And don't go to a therapist you don't need one Lol your just fine.

spykehex · 2022-04-15T04:05:21+00:00

F, get over it, dont be obsesive, and focus on you own objectives as a human being like any other person, dont be a creepy man stalker, just keep going your own way.

SweelFor- · 2022-05-31T12:45:57+00:00

Congratulations

wiwoo · 2022-03-05T04:34:49+00:00

Sounds like your mistake was not mixing in the good stuff. Obviously what you were doing worked at the beginning, it was a good ingredient, but it has to be a mix. You can’t get someone hooked on nothing but aloofness, there needs to be breaks and tender moments hinting at what could be, if only she can finally break down your walls.

Don’t throw the baby out with the bath water here. A lot of people will lose attraction for you if you show too much vulnerability, or devalue you if you’re too available. How much depends on the person and their culture; you’ve got to judge by the individual and don’t let the pendulum swing all the way into the opposite end of things either.

Title	Redpill ruined the perfect relationship
Author	getzy131620
Upvotes	172
Comments	59
Date	March 4, 2022 3:52 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/t6lz7p/redpill_ruined_the_perfect_relationship/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/redpill-ruined-the-perfect-relationship.1104188 https://theredarchive.com/post/1104188