In my experience, it almost always is.

Of the people i've known in abusive relationships, it wasn't usually them going against the will of their whole family and friends. It's been a system of subtle and overt digs and blame that gets thrown their way by the people who are supposed to want whats best for them until the women internalize it.

A lot of times there is no one around who will validate how the victim feels or that what is happening to them is not right.

I know that some of church folks I grew up with tried to act like some of my older female relatives were hysterical because of some terrible shit men did to them and that somehow being more biblical would save them.

They routinely pressure women to martyr themselves and save these fucked up men.

They'll say stuff like ""You're a strong woman for remaining in the marriage" or they'll just flat out refuse to talk about it or assume she's exaggerating.

They point out all the “good” things about the man and tell her she’s asking too much.

IMO, Abuse doesn't just happen in a vacuum, usually there is a whole community around that supports it. It's the flat out refusal to take women seriously and hold men accountable.

What do you think?