Damned if we do damned if we don’t..

royaldetour · 2020-05-12T15:42:13+00:00

'Really I appreciate it, but no thanks' is in no way a rude response. A bit overly polite imo, but this guy clearly doesn't give a single fuck about your boundaries and the unfortunate truth is that being overly polite while standing your ground is often necessary to prevent violence. Men can get angry and violent anyway, but sometimes you can tell that anything other than saccharine sweetness will set them off. Its infuriating. At a party with your friends around, I wouldn't think this approach is necessary but in a more isolated environment, yeah, you have to be "rude" in a very polite way.

Maisiebr · 2020-05-12T15:41:31+00:00

You don't want a guy who ignores your boundaries right after meeting for the first time.

rebylblue · 2020-05-12T16:01:05+00:00

Stop caring about coming off as rude. He's the rude one. Bitch=Broad In Total Control Of Herself. I take pride in stepping on toes.

2020-05-12T17:20:42+00:00

[deleted]

jeanneeebeanneee · 2020-05-12T19:36:28+00:00

Having to say "NO" multiple times to a grown man = huge bright red flag. No means no. If asserting your boundaries makes others think you're rude, so be it. Protect yourself. No one else is going to.

Adminious · 2020-05-12T19:00:38+00:00

Call him out and say, I don't know what you did to that drink. I don't know you and that how women get date raped.

Yeah I'm that girl, but hey I'll be that girl for you too. I make sure all my girls are taken care of at the expense of my reputation with some random dude.

Everyone who know me, know I'm a good nice present person who a bit socially awkward. And I'm ok with that since me and my girls are safe. Call me a rude bitch rapist, I dare you

lival42 · 2020-05-12T15:51:27+00:00

“Did you do what I said? No? That’s on you.”

radical__daphne · 2020-05-12T16:36:18+00:00

There's no point even engaging with these men. Just take the drink, say thanks and then set it down somewhere like it's poison and forget it.

2020-05-12T21:52:55+00:00

[deleted]

cherrybombfield · 2020-05-12T22:15:32+00:00

And if you drink it chances are it is rufeed. I straight up tell people I don't take drinks from strangers- stranger danger doesn't stop when you become an adult and if that offends them then either they are a predator or clueless either way good riddance.

WestAtmosphere · 2020-05-12T22:46:07+00:00

Does anyone get a little high off of saying no, sure it's annoying being pestered still consistently. But it's sort of funny watching someone try to plea for your attention, and we just walk away from it. It's probably because it's so off of our normal kind nature to apologize for things we shouldn't apologize for.

I'll wear asshole/bitch as a badge of honour tbh if it was earned from ignoring a man who doesn't know the meaning of no.

2020-05-12T21:39:17+00:00

And it's probably roofied

Loonelle · 2020-05-12T22:36:28+00:00

If a male does not listen to no the first time he is an immediate predator. RED FLAG. No is a complete sentence.

ny-lady · 2020-05-12T23:06:44+00:00

No is a full sentence.

BerryCocoLove · 2020-05-13T02:09:48+00:00

I actually HAVE been roofied in the past. Luckily I was with a girlfriend and told her right away that I felt weird, so we got out of the area quick and took an Uber home. This happened in a public place

My number one tip would be to say hello to a couple of people when you first arrive and BEFORE you start drinking, that way, you’re establishing rapport. It’s easier to get out of a conversation if you have one or two people trying to talk rather than having one guy hang around for too long

painterdarkly · 2020-05-13T03:29:48+00:00

I recently had an awful experience at a good friends party. I was getting ready to go, this guy says he’ll walk me out to my car. I said, “no I’m okay, it’s literally right next to the house.” He still said, “it’s okay” and walks with me outside the front door.

I’ve literally never met this guy before yet he’s “being nice” by trying to walk me to my car. He insisted he wanted to make sure I get into my car safely...like I’m not a grown ass woman who can get in my own damn car w/o help. I said again, “no it’s okay. Go back to the party.” He says, “no it’s fine.”

I’m stopped in their driveway and refuse to move until he goes back inside. He won’t, trying to get me to point out my car. I’m so confused at this point but have a bad feeling and hate the disrespect I’m getting from this douche so I went back inside to get a friend to walk with me.

He got all confused and almost looked offended that I didn’t let him walk me. Like hell no. He wouldn’t listen to what I was saying, why the hell would I want him to get near me in any way, shape, or form. It’s mind blowing what some men think they can get away with by “being nice”.

GuineveresGrace · 2020-05-13T15:58:18+00:00

It’s also a way that people use you to drink the contaminated drink. It’s one surefire way to roofie people; have them drink it out of social pressure, under their watch so they know you drank all of it.

It’s all about control. Don’t take any chance of being drugged. These situations? He had plenty of time to drop a dose in while he was on the other side of the crowd.

baby--bunny · 2020-05-13T04:18:02+00:00

What do I do if my grandmother does this tho 😐

Title	Damned if we do damned if we don’t..
Author	ScarletFate779
Upvotes	553
Comments	33
Date	May 12, 2020 3:27 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/gidc3q/damned_if_we_do_damned_if_we_dont/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/damned-if-we-do-damned-if-we-dont.676342 https://theredarchive.com/post/676342

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