Ladies, stop praising men for 'helping' with housework. A partner should do housework because he is independently motivated to perform this basic life skill, and should not expect praise for doing so. Saying that he "helps" implies that he is aiding you with something that you inherently own.

Ownership and accountability for tedious, everyday tasks is a burden that society tends to place on women. There's a reason that promotion to management general comes with a pay raise; managers aren't compensated for the effort that they put in (at times they put in less than their employees), but for the accountability that they have in ensuring that things are done. If an employee is out sick or resigns, managers generally make sure the work gets done and own the potential failure of the effort. You aren't his manager, and you aren't inherently accountable for the task. Ever notice the difference between "traditional" women's tasks versus men's? "Make sure that dinner is available every day for the rest of your life" versus "fix things when they break" (and, bonus, society says you can even procrastinate and/or bitch and moan if it's mentioned). One is a daily burden with no reward and only potential failure if the task isn't performed, and one is an off nominal event in which repair comes with gratification. Don't fall for it.

Red flags: - Doesn't keep his own place up. - Will clean up his own mess, but not others'. - Attempts to scorekeep in order to achieve 50/50 "fairness" rather than getting the job done because it needs to be done and he is, presumably, a competent adult. - Only contributes to everyday tasks during 'convenient' times. - Family history of traditional gender roles. - Expects more praise for contributing to "your" job than with other tasks.

It took me a while to learn that a partner doing more than 50% at times is not necessarily enough, and that regression is possible even with males with high value traits (there is no inherently HVM). So make sure that you have your self a grown ass adult, even if your FDS is now your FMS.