Hey all,

So for the past one month, I've been talking to a guy from OKC that I thought seemed like a dream. He took me out, paid for everything, we had great chemistry, and seemed to want the same things from life. His only request was to "take things slow", which to I agreed. I started noticing about 2 weeks into us talking that communication had dropped off substantially between dates but I just thought he was just busy or something and held out hope. I became so attached to him that I could barely focus on schoolwork and was extremely anxious the days he never texted me between dates. I even made the mistake of texting first on some occasions after 3-4 days have passed of no communication because I wanted to know so badly that he was still there, and he was, but not fully.

I became fed up with this lack of communication and at the back of my mind knew the reason (he's not that into me) but just didn't want to accept it. I felt like he was my only hope of finding someone I thought I clicked with and also found attractive and have also never been in a relationship (I'm a 20F) so I felt desperate for things to work. I just wanted to know how it felt to be loved and adored.

So, I told him to call me tonight and we had a chat about the lack of communication. He said he knew we weren't talking as much and that he should talk to me more throughout the week. Should, not wanted to. He said he just "didn't know what he wanted" and was afraid due to his past hurts. I told him that I don't want to be with someone who isn't sure about me and then he asked what I wanted to do. I said I wish him well but we need to go our separate ways. There was no fight from his end to try and make things work, he just let me go so easily. From this, I knew that he never really truly liked me in the first place.

I'm pretty hurt right now and though I know we were seeing each other for only one month, my brain just got so attached to him. I'm never putting myself through this hell ever again. I don't care if a guy says he likes me in the beginning, takes me out or gives me the whole damn world. I won't believe any of that until I see effort being made over a very very long period of time. I believed he was a good guy but if I hadn't had that conversation with him, he would have strung me along for God knows how long. Due to my lack of dating experience, If I hadn't been on this sub, I wouldn't have even known what was going on and been strung along for ages.

I'm not going to let this get me down though and am grateful for this experience. I'm taking this as a sign I need to focus on myself, love myself more, become truly happy being single and never ever ever ever ever (did I say ever?) get attached to these guys until they show consistently over a very long period of time that they are worthy of those precious emotions.

If you guys have any big sister encouragement, I would be glad to hear it to help keep me in a positive mindstate. <3