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ishika_23
[–]throwawayitstFDS Apprentice120 points121 points122 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Im the happiest ive ever been, been 3.5 months since i broke up with the ‘love of my ..’ nativity BS ☺️
I go to sleep feeling grateful everyday and it has changed my life
[–]BluefoxcrushFDS Newbie23 points24 points25 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Good for you! Work it!
[–]queen-wannabeThrowaway Account1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
now this is the kind of positivity I want to see!
[–]redpeithosFDS Apprentice107 points108 points109 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
It also certainly helps once you remove the rosy glasses and start seeing things the way they are. Many men who used to seem special become uninteresting - and perhaps even repulsive - once you remove these glasses.
[–]Solid-LiquidFDS Newbie55 points56 points57 points 6 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
Yep. Once I removed the glasses, stepped back and actually looked at my relationship, I realized that he was a loser who still hasn’t gotten his bachelors after 10 years, that the relationship isn’t going anywhere, that he wanted me to wait for him to get his shit together wasting my best years on him. I was seeing people on FB actually spending time with their spouses, and yet I’m getting movies and Netflix and chill dates. I started resenting and hating him and by the time he could “finally” make time to take me out (while I was in the process of ending the relationship), I had already emotionally detached from the relationship and nothing he could say would bring me back
[–]PsychologicalBeat2FDS Newbie69 points70 points71 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Lmao this is so true. If I ran into my ex now I wouldn't even give him a second look
[–]just_takin_the_dFDS Apprentice55 points56 points57 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Past pickme "he's bald and fat, has no fashion sense, isnt achieving anything in his career, is in a mountain of a debt and has mental health issues. But he seems really into me! Lil old me! This must be something really special!" Queue me falling too quickly and scaring a guy off who was well below me, leaving me scratching my head as to why I couldn't even keep such a loser. (Hint: too fast, too available, too much of an easy 'win').
Me now: "Men have to prove to me why I would spend my limited time with them. In the mean time, I'll keep working towards my other goals".
Working on your self-worth is my number one advice to newbies. It allows you to cutoff terrible behaviour and losers which you previously you allowed to slide into your life, wasting your time.
You know you've grown when you see your past guys and cringe and say "eww no".
[–]pickmieshaexorcistFDS Apprentice48 points49 points50 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Very true. My ex husband was an emotionally unavailable nerdy “intellectual”. I used to be all about the aloof nerd boys. Not anymore, no way, no how. My current husband is so different that I’d have never imagined myself where I am now years ago.
[–]SreshmeFDS Newbie36 points37 points38 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
For most of us, he was never our type and level to begin with.
[–]keepcalmandFREAKOUTFDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This. And usually the issue is our own bad image of ourselves. In one of my uni courses there was this guy whom I had a massive crush on but never dared to let it show because I thought I'm too old (5 years older), too ugly and he could never be interested in my type. He recently married a woman even older than me, and while it's not all about looks and I don't want to be an ass, I say I at least do not look worse than her, maybe we are even a similar type. I COULD have been his type, I'm sure. And there were situations were he approached me, but since I did not go to uni much and was busy scoring some loser online, there never were many opportunities for me to get to know this dude. I ruled it out from the beginning. Today I'm not sure he's such a catch anymore either, just saying if I had not told myself the story of too old, too ugly and so on.. I probably could have been unhappy (or happy) with this guy instead of with online loser fulltime gamer anger issues dude who was also 5 years younger, lol.
[–]SreshmeFDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I hear you sis! Same. Sometimes we are so into other person, we value them over ourselves. We give importance to their emotions over ours.
[–][deleted] 38 points39 points40 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
If you cringe at the the thought of the men you've dated in the past, you've definitely leveled up!
[–]trippyslothsFDS Newbie74 points75 points76 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
So true. I always date guys that look completely different so if an ex runs into me, he sees that he isn’t even my type anymore. Or I date ones that look similar to show how replaceable men are. What do you think hits worse? If he looks like your new man or looks completely different 😂
[–]Recommend_me_movies17 points18 points19 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Well, first time my ex saw me after dumping me, I was with my girlfriend soooo...
[–]BovvsetteFDS Disciple12 points13 points14 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Honestly, I don't even care what mine thinks. I live for myself and date or not date for myself, his existence, opinions or emotions play no role in my life choices anymore.
[–]msromperstomperFDS Apprentice18 points19 points20 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is brutal. I like it.
[–]bey124FDS Newbie78 points79 points80 points 6 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Now, let’s call us women instead of “females” and I can 100% agree
[+][deleted] 6 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link
[deleted]
[–]bey124FDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
EXACTLY!
[–]QuodpotFDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Well, just to clarify: saying something like 'female friends' is okay since the word is being used properly as an adjective, vs. using it like a noun, which is how incels say it. I had a woman get upset at me for describing my girlfriends one time as 'female friends'
[–]ThatTXHRladyFDS Newbie23 points24 points25 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This is so true! Iwish had found this sub before finding my ex. Throughout that whole relationship I was such a pick me. We had just had a baby who was born with complications and I kept worrying if I was meeting my ex's needs while caring for our sick baby.
That's when I realized my child needed me more and my looks, job, etc. could go to hell as long as this child was healthy. I kept trying to convince my ex "give me time, I'll go back to work and start bringing money in again, just let the little one get healthy". Nope, he continued cheating cause "I wasn't meeting his needs, I wasn't taking care of myself".
So I threw the whole dude away, my child outgrew his condition, I finished my bachelor's, got my professional certification, got the best job ever with great compensation, opened a side business, and feel a whole lot better about myself.
I wouldn't even look at him now 🙄🙄🙄
[–]Bitemebitch00FDS Apprentice5 points6 points7 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I don’t know you but I’m so proud of you!!
[–]venus_leeFDS Newbie18 points19 points20 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is honestly so fuuny and true, even personality has to be different
[–]pancakeCEOFDS Newbie11 points12 points13 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is so true... I leveled up haaaardcore after the disintegration of my first relationship. I don't know what happened to my ex but he gained what looks like 50+ pounds. It doesn't bring me any gratification just vague sadness for humanity.
[–][deleted] 9 points10 points11 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Lmao true. I look back with disgust.
[–]keepcalmandFREAKOUTFDS Newbie8 points9 points10 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Same and it's weird how this works. I used to look at the photos of my ex with love and thinking he looked good but now I only think "Ewwww". Like his face, while looking exactly as before, became fully ugly.
[–]Saving_Is_Golden4 points5 points6 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I can't wait to level up.
[–]SuccessfulShow5Pickmeisha™️4 points5 points6 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I’m trying 😢
[–]even_thrillerFDS Apprentice2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Pretty much this is spot on. Its healthy to complete a lot of self reflection and change after a relationship that eventually you turn cringe and think 'why did I ever date this person?!'
[–]em0873FDS Apprentice2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
True lol my type is girls now lmao
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[–]throwawayitstFDS Apprentice120 points121 points122 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]BluefoxcrushFDS Newbie23 points24 points25 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]queen-wannabeThrowaway Account1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]redpeithosFDS Apprentice107 points108 points109 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Solid-LiquidFDS Newbie55 points56 points57 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]PsychologicalBeat2FDS Newbie69 points70 points71 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]just_takin_the_dFDS Apprentice55 points56 points57 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]pickmieshaexorcistFDS Apprentice48 points49 points50 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]SreshmeFDS Newbie36 points37 points38 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]keepcalmandFREAKOUTFDS Newbie9 points10 points11 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]SreshmeFDS Newbie4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 38 points39 points40 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]trippyslothsFDS Newbie74 points75 points76 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Recommend_me_movies17 points18 points19 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]BovvsetteFDS Disciple12 points13 points14 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]msromperstomperFDS Apprentice18 points19 points20 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]bey124FDS Newbie78 points79 points80 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[+][deleted] (3 children) | Copy Link
[deleted]
[–]bey124FDS Newbie5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]QuodpotFDS Newbie1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]ThatTXHRladyFDS Newbie23 points24 points25 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Bitemebitch00FDS Apprentice5 points6 points7 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]venus_leeFDS Newbie18 points19 points20 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]pancakeCEOFDS Newbie11 points12 points13 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 9 points10 points11 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]keepcalmandFREAKOUTFDS Newbie8 points9 points10 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Saving_Is_Golden4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]SuccessfulShow5Pickmeisha™️4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]even_thrillerFDS Apprentice2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]em0873FDS Apprentice2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link