Porn is neither harmless nor fantasy

scorchedsouI · 2021-12-31T17:44:27+00:00

If a man tells you nothing, assume he is addicted to porn and likes violent "sex". If he tells you he's into BDSM, assume he pleasures himself to real videos of women getting raped, harmed and murdered. If a man admits to watching gore videos, search his basement for rape slaves and skeletons.

Mcccy · 2021-12-31T17:57:12+00:00

Ah yes how DARE you kink shame SNUFF FILMS. /S

bookworm1896 · 2021-12-31T18:05:15+00:00

"The only violent thing I can remember is him yelling at me"

Well there is your red flag, he is already yelling at you. Yelling men scare me shitless. I would be on my way out.

Bonds_Girl · 2021-12-31T18:18:47+00:00

Imagine masturbating to someone’s absolute pain, trauma, terror, and inevitable (insinuated) death…excusing it by saying it’s just porn (fantasy), and then expecting to rationalize this kink to someone you’re in a relationship with; and on top of all that HEAP of a mind F mess, expecting her to understand. Perhaps even throw in; We need to communicate about this, you need to work on your insecurities.

No. Just need to not date someone who cums to murder and rape.

This is just so dark, twisted and sick. Men who watch that shit need to be rejected by ALL women for their duration on earth. JFC

kansascitydream · 2021-12-31T19:07:11+00:00

**Trigger warning rape+ assault** This is very, very true. I used to be a kinkmesha. The most abusive man I ever dated , was a “dom” the lines between sex began to blur, he started hitting me and screaming at me in “real life”. When we had sex , he NEVER listened to our “safe word” he escalated to choking me until I almost blacked out. When I tried to communicate 🤡 that I didn’t like what he was doing , he laughed and said that I did like it, and was lieing. I never had consensual sex with this person. He would shame women who didn’t do kink, saying “I could never be with someone that wasn’t kinky” his favourite kind of porn? Women in straight jackets, being raped, and throwing up. I was so delusional when I made excuses for him. “It’s just fantasy” I post frequently on here about this specific relationship. Any messed up story I have on here, is about this individual,because it caused me immense psychological harm. I am healing in therapy, and suspect that I will be in therapy for the foreseeable future. If a man ever watches violent porn, 🚩NEVER make excuses for it. It is a big red flag for being abusive. He will gaslight you into oblivion, and cause you extreme harm. The way I see it, I am lucky to be alive. I work hard at my career and mental health, and I’m resilient as ef. I do not drink or do drugs. I am coping very well. I just believe that my life story would be a lot better, if I had listened to my gut, and avoided this sociopathic “dom”. It is not harmless. To any woman making excuses, do you really want to live with trauma? Do you want to put your life at risk? I’m hoping the answer is “no”. Avoid men that watch violent porn, and claim to be into BDSM. It is a reflection of how they view women. It will save you years, possibly a lifetime of trauma.

Mcccy · 2021-12-31T19:20:35+00:00

I genuinely wonder how men would react if women out of sudden started enjoying men being tortured in porn. Like one day you wake up and all that's trending on porn sites are men humiliation/pain/gore stuff.

They'd call us all monsters and sick but now that's it's women being degraded and hurt it's ok and just a link/fantasy????

BasketLow8411 · 2021-12-31T18:46:33+00:00

Oh good I was hoping she would break up with him. Her instincts are spot on.

mynameisrominka · 2021-12-31T19:17:54+00:00

I'm so glad she ran for the hills

abby_ch238 · 2021-12-31T20:01:02+00:00

How in the world did we ever come to a point where if you find someone gets off on watching someone getting STABBED it’s KINKSHAMING WHAT

THAT’S STRAIGHT UP A SERIAL KILLER AND PPL ARE SAYING DON’T KINKSHAME??? ARE THEY ABSOLUTELY NUTS OR ARE THERE MORE SOCIOPATHS IN THE WORLD THAN WE THINK????

onceuponasea · 2021-12-31T19:59:03+00:00

I’m so glad she dumped him I was worried she would listen to the incels in the comment section

onceuponasea · 2021-12-31T20:01:07+00:00

Avoid all men who watch porn. Period.

Davina33 · 2021-12-31T20:23:37+00:00

I commented on that post before seeing this one. Thankfully most people saw sense but there were still people minimising what that boyfriend was up to. That guy should be turned into the police. I bet he watches CP as well.

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AceFaceXena · 2021-12-31T17:45:59+00:00

This is so sickening. She saved her own life by breaking up with him.

Prestigious_Olive467 · 2021-12-31T17:46:50+00:00

Better safe than sorry...

Aht-Aht-Aht-Scrote · 2021-12-31T18:00:03+00:00

I will never trust a male who watches ANY porn bc they will just keep watching more and more depraved stuff until they reach THIS degree of porn. This type of porn user is created from becoming desensitized from watching so much porn they need to keep that high up by watching more and more extreme sexual acts that are almost ALWAYS violent towards women. And the fact that a man could get to this point of ENJOYING watching a woman being murdered during sex and just think “meh it’s natural” is so insane to me!! When are they going to actually realize that porn is not harmless or fantasy or “acting” or whatever else they want to cope w to not feel like a fuckin degenerate. This man needs to be locked up away from every woman bc he will no doubt murder a woman one day in the name of his penis. I am SO happy that she dumped him and I only pray that no other woman is victim to dating him.

Iiawgiwbi · 2021-12-31T18:27:34+00:00

The fact that she feels she needs to defend her decision from people who'll inevitably tell her she's wrong is so sad. And "harmless" fantasy? Isn't snuff porn video evidence of actual crimes being committed? Or is there now a slightly less deplorable genre of pretend snuff porn? Sis, if someone's masturbating to people being stabbed, RUN.

corkymuu · 2021-12-31T18:42:09+00:00

I don’t even understand this, why do men need violence in sex? Why do they want to hurt us so badly? I feel like women never think about the psychological driver of bdsm. Why does that exist in the first place?

usernamewhichiafree · 2021-12-31T19:41:24+00:00

How the fuck is it a "fantasy" if a real woman got stabbed and raped while crying??? What part of that is a fantasy, a "harmless" fantasy even???

I hate how she has to justify her decision.

"I have anxiety"

"I found it on accident, I didn't snoop"

"He only yelled at me"

"Yeah he warned me but only about BDSM"

As if I need to justify myself when I dump my stupid boyfriend when he watches women get stabbed and raped AND gets off of it.

pixiegaia · 2021-12-31T19:59:22+00:00

Other sexual red flags is a need to try anal, hentai, excessive masturbation. Most hentai has girls in it that look 12. Excessive masturbation is dopamine addiction. Guys who have a thing for anal are closeted 90% of the time.

fdsbackup4lve · 2021-12-31T19:59:47+00:00

Wow good for her for standing her ground. Was it an actual stabbing??? That’s illegal porn isn’t it??

Attheatelier · 2021-12-31T20:05:43+00:00

I really don't understand how the fuck m*n get off to women being harmed and killed. How is that normal? How does one get horny off of shit like that?

The OP in that post absolutely did the right thing. There's no logical excuse for why someone would be attracted to shit like that unless they have violent or murderous tendencies. Nothing sexy about rape, stabbings and murder. Disgusting.

Also as someone who comes from a third world country where violence is very real and people get murdered by their own government and their own people, I would never EVER date a man into snuff or anything remotely violent (or porn in general but I digress) and I'd be EXTREMELY horrified and offended.

ARealDame · 2021-12-31T20:19:03+00:00

That so many people call footage of real women being injured, tortured and murdered "harmless" is heartbreaking.

Title	Porn is neither harmless nor fantasy
Author	howdoilogoutt
Upvotes	186
Comments	34
Date	December 31, 2021 5:38 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/rsz1ys/porn_is_neither_harmless_nor_fantasy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/porn-is-neither-harmless-nor-fantasy.1089742 https://theredarchive.com/post/1089742

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