Checking Our Privilege

2011-07-08T07:33:42+00:00

A man who sleeps around is a deadbeat dad, or a false rape claim, or a date rape claim, etc etc. Not to mention creep (stole this from another comment).

The main issue woman have to deal with that men don't is constant female bullying. Women judge women all the time. This is what makes pregnancy so truamatic for many of them.

That aside all women should be giving birth squatting, not lying on their back, this is safer and would reduce tearing. The only reason they lie on their back is so the doctor isn't uncomfortable.

Also being a house wife while not actually that hard, is aspirations death for many. At least a nanny has a career and is building a resume.

megazen · 2011-07-08T15:00:57+00:00

You should check the Female Privilege Checklist.

spagma · 2011-07-08T08:21:59+00:00

"Slut vs stud" exists because of how courtship has evolved in our society. Men sleeping around is looked at as an achievement because that man has convinced or attracted many women. On the other hand, a woman who has had sex with a lot of men, simply said "yes" many times. If we ever get to a point where women ask men out at equal levels, the word "slut" will lose most its meaning.

Personally I think men and women should enjoy as much safe sex as possible, so don't get the wrong impression that I think women who sleep around should be shamed.

Faryshta · 2011-07-08T15:04:46+00:00

The word slut is more used by women than men.

mwPlusOne · 2011-07-08T09:50:44+00:00

I have never heard of any so-called 'male privilege' that deserves the word. We live in a society where being a woman allows you to commit crimes without punishment and perpetrate physical, emotional and financial abuse with the full support of the state. Seeing your own gender in political offices or not being called a slut, these are not 'male privileges' and calling them such is not only petty and misleading, its insulting. You cannot equivocate these with the privileges that women enjoy. To suggest that they are comparable is misandry and white knighting. The fact that we are even having this conversation is a result of female privilege. No one goes around talking about the 'privileges' of serfs and servants.

2011-07-08T08:21:14+00:00

pure vs loser double standard

re: virginity or lack of prowess.

Feckless · 2011-07-08T08:35:09+00:00

The slut vs stud thingie isn't necessarily so. See here -> http://feck-blog.blogspot.com/2011/03/slutty-studs.html

pompitous_of_love · 2011-07-08T10:39:18+00:00

Not in public. There are "male privileges" in private institutions, especially religious ones. Most churches do not ordain women. Freemasons is still a mens-only club.

I'm not aware of any formal "male privileges" in the public realm.

Among informal privileges, I suppose the "slut vs stud" double-standard exists, because of biology.

nlakes · 2011-07-08T07:32:54+00:00

Men definitely have it easier, on average, when it comes to sleeping around. However, we also aren't trusted around children.
For whatever reason, we're more confident on average negotiating better pay and therefore get paid more.
We absolutely don't have to take time off work to have kids, but the negative side of this coin, we often have a smaller involvement in the kids early years.
We're physically stronger. Which again does come with negative connotations, i.e. injured gf, people assume abuse.

I guess the list goes on, there are privileges to being a man. But there are also privileges of being a woman, being black or being tall.

ManThoughts · 2011-07-08T12:37:53+00:00

Slut vs. Stud is not male privilege, it is a form of protection against cuckolding. Up until recently, there was no such thing as paternity tests. And men, when they married a woman, needed to have as much assurance as possible that the baby she pushes out is his.

A promiscuous woman is less trustworthy in this regard than a chaste one. Therefore, if a woman was to be good marriage material for an upstanding man, she should be chaste.

It is not accurate to say that promiscuous men were/are known as "studs." Responsible parents used to bend over backwards to protect their daughters from promiscuous men, and male promiscuity was not deemed "studley" by respected members of the community.

In recent times, fathers have been forbidden from raising their daughters and mothers have become slut-enablers, so promiscuous men are not properly shamed and are considered "studs" by naive and horny young people.

jmnzz · 2011-07-08T07:28:45+00:00

While I have no way of knowing if men are shamed as much as women for sleeping around, there is an equivalent to slut used for men besides "man-slut" that I haven't seen anyone in the feminist-MRA argument mention; womanizer.

Men are indeed often congratulated by other men for bedding a large number of women but I feel there is a more practical reason for this.

Women are the choosers.

Sure there are women who will ask a guy out but the overwhelming majority of people who have to initiate dating are men. It is not as easy as men just walking up and saying "hi, you look nice, wanna go out sometime" and getting a date.

So I feel the reason men are looked upon as "studs" when they sleep with a lot of women is because it is damn hard to sleep with a lot of women for a lot of men. I think that is a large part of why men brag about the number of good looking women they sleep with.

Women, on the other hand, at least from what I have seen, look down on men who sleep around. Because either their parents or their friends warn them that "men are only after one thing" women will steer clear of men who are known for hooking up with several random women.

So while slut is used in terms of men not wanting to be with a woman who has slept with a large amount of men.

Womanizer is used in the same fashion.

nochanceofdownvote · 2011-07-08T20:27:59+00:00

The inverse of Slut vs. Stud is gold digger vs. tool.

If a woman gets a bunch of men to pay for her every need, she's seen as successful in the dating world.

If a man gives up his money to women easily, he's seen as a tool and looked down upon by other men, and easy by women.

photogrl88 · 2011-07-17T22:15:46+00:00

Wow...just...wow. Someone finally in r/mens rights tries to bring up the topic of men 'checking our privilege' at the door, and what does everyone here pretty much do? Deny that such privilege even exists. Just..wow. As a male, especially is you are a white male you have privilege, and do need to check it. End of story. Mens rights will never become an established movement, or even be taken seriously unless you being to do this.

memymineown · 2011-07-08T08:43:17+00:00

There are a two things wrong with claiming there is a double standard with slut shaming that I can see(there may be more but it is 4 in the morning and I got 4 hours of sleep last night)

Virgin shaming. This is almost the same thing but with one major difference. Most men who are virgins don't choose to be virgins. They are forced into it by lack of female response.
It is far, far easier for women to have sex then men. If a man has had sex with 74 women he has had to convince every single one of those women to have sex with him. If a woman has had sex with 74 men she is easily convinced.

The only place where males have privilege in society is that we can take our tops off in public. But let's not mention that this is being infringed upon in many places and that the original point of the law was against men.

Title	Checking Our Privilege
Author	misterdoctorproff
Upvotes	6
Comments	66
Date	July 8, 2011 7:04 AM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/ijtqm/checking_our_privilege/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/checking-our-privilege.1037628 https://theredarchive.com/post/1037628

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