https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/nep7gz/twelve-things-youll-learn-as-a-woman-dating-men-in-her-20s
Nested in the beginning of this article, the author writes:
Men Just Want to Fuck
Turns out your mom's not wrong about literally everything: Boys really are after one thing!
With that first breakup, you start to suspect that men are disgusting animals—pigs! rats! ratty pig-boys!—who see all women as pieces of meat and just want to endlessly have sex. Post-Dan, you're reading introductory feminism, which is confirming this miserable life lesson.
I think a fundamental disagreement that women have with RP as an ideology, is that it merely sees women as pieces of meat to bone. Let's talk about Kantianism for a second.
He draws a distinction between mere use – the basis of objectification – and more-than-mere use. While we might employ people to do jobs, and accept payment for our work, we don’t treat the person on the other side of the transaction as a mere tool; we still recognise that person’s fundamental humanity.
But really, what’s the big deal? Yes, we objectify each other in sex and let ourselves be objectified. Worse things have happened and will happen. At least with sex there is pleasure (if all goes well) and lots of it (if all goes really well). Whatever is wrong with sexual objectification can’t be that bad, surely?
But there’s a snag. The capacity to reason is what makes people ends in themselves, worthy of moral respect, according to Kant. And what’s objectifying about sexual desire is its ability to numb a person to reason, both in themselves and in others. Its power is such that it makes our reason its servant: our rationality becomes the means to satisfy its goals. It has been the downfall of kings and leaders; the ruination of relationships; the seedbed of lies in the pursuit of getting laid (‘Me too! I love atonal music!’). In my pursuit to fulfil it, I cheat, I deceive, I pretend to be not who I am – and not just to the other person, but to myself, too. I set aside the other’s rationality, and in doing so, set aside their humanity. That is not my concern; his or her body is.
Is it possible to have sex without objectification? Of course. Prostitutes do it all the time. So do many long-term couples. They have sex with people whom they do not desire. And with no desire, there is no objectification. Not even love can fix it. When the desire is high, when the sexual act is in full swing, my beloved is a piece of flesh. (Though love does lead to occasional cuddling, which is nice.)
Wrapping up a few of the past threads this week. Duty sex within marriage and the female distaste for male preferences. Do you agree with Kant that sexual desire and objectification are inseparable, and a force that morality must reckon with? Is objectification a male preference that women ubiquitously disparage?
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