Today there was a pretty controversial thread on TRP on how women deserve to be treated like shit. Awhile back this sort of post would have been pretty upsetting to me, but today I could read the whole thread easily and even understand where he was coming from. I think I'm getting pretty good about not letting the outrage bait affect my mental state. I'm even happy he wrote it for the additional practice. I'd like to share how I read TRP now in hopes that this might help some other BPiller or women not be so hurt from reading these threads. It may seem trivial and stupid to get upset over something on the interent, but it happens. Reddit attracts people with anxiety, codependency, and depression issues. Here is how to deal with it. I'm writing this from the point of view of a BPiller, but the same would apply to RPillers too.

1) Identify what it is that's threatening to you.

For me it was that part of me believes that I actually do deserve to be treated like shit. Since some man on the internet confirmed an insecurity of mine, the insecurity (me being worthy of abuse) was true.

2) Find a way to rationally difuse the threat.

Even if I do deserve to be treated like shit, I could still recognize being treated poorly and leave the situation. There is nothing stopping me from walking away from whatever I dislike, whether I deserve it or not. In addition, I do not particularly respect the man who wrote that post. Since "women deserve to be treated like shit" is only his opinion and not a factual statement (deserve is subjective), then I have no reason to value his opinion over someone that I do respect and who would likely think otherwise.

3) Reread the thread to find out what is threatening to OP.

OP talks about how society treats men. He gives an example of not being able to sit next to a child on a plane since men are assumed to be child molesters. He thinks society is treating him like shit. That is what is threatening to OP. He cannot follow step 2 because he cannot walk away from society. What do people do when they cannot walk away from a threat? They fight back. That's what OP is doing with his post. Now I feel as though I understand him and can even sympathize with him. Even though he may believe that I deserve to be treated like shit, I do not have to believe this about myself and I can look past this to see the other content of his post.

BP does the same thing by calling RPillers misogynist, toxic, neckbeard virgins. They don't know how to do step 2 either, so they fight back by mocking and shaming RPillers. It keeps going in circles, but all anyone has to do is rationally diffuse the threat until it doesn't feel threatening anymore. That is all that is required for us to understand each other.