Whenever I see a man bring up that women are incredibly selective - women unanimously agree in concert:
"women are independent, why don't need men, we ONLY want someone who compliments our life - and that bar is HIGH",
"I'm sorry but I just find the vast vast majority of men unnattractive, I RARELY find a man attractive, maybe 2-3 times a year when I go out"
"I mean, I get your point that women only find a few select men attractive, but isn't that like a basic foundation for a relatinonship, wouldn't you want to be attracted to your partner?"
etc etc etc.
At the same time, it is a fact that alot of people are partnered - far far more than what the online dating and real world experience with women (and on PPD) would suggest.
What I've also found is that the selectivity is not only extreme, but also targeted at men with overlapping attributes (the common retort from women is "well, we are selective but we like different men - which I've found to NOT be true in general).
In fact, I've seen this first hand in the city I'm in - being fortunate to make swaths of new friends, meeting new people, and meeting tons of women. the selectivity can only be described as mind-boggling. To illustrate my point - I'm in a few social groups in my city - mostly with people newer to the city. these social groups are probably 70% women.
We'll often go out, or bring new people into the group - and the question of "hey any cute guys/girls" sometimes comes up - either going out to the bars/other activities or just with whose in the group.
"eh..none of the guys are my type"
"ugh I havn't seen an attractive guy in like 2 months"
often times when someone finds someone attractive, everyone else ALSO finds them attractive - and then try to pursue the guy in some form. this typically only happens if the guy is tall and good looking, period. and the groups I'm part are full of decently attractive, successful people (doctors, lawyers, etc)
Basically, my real world experience consistenly shows that women find only a very VERY small % of men atttractive, and often the same types of men - which is aligned with the red pill theory of hypergamy and what alot of men state on here is causing alot of issues today such as male loneliness, etc.
Also, personality seems to play almost zero role in changing things - as in women have stated that they REQUIRE the initial attraction and for the guy to be their type, and getting to know them doesnt change anything.
This is my personal example, across different social groups and also across what I've observed on PPD and with my other friends as well.
The funny thing is, this has gotten more and more pronounced over the past 15 years - as in I've noticed women finding far less men atttractive and REQUIRING a high level of initial physical attraction, in contrast to being a "well put together but not her exact type" guy and him winning her over with personality/connection/etc.
Note - this is what I observe in the mostly late twenties/early thirties crowd, if that helps.
So women, how do you explain this extreme discrepency between stated irreconciable preferences and your statements that "most people end up partnered?
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