Pumping & Dumping VS Seeing Escorts

super-commenting · 2017-05-04T02:21:13+00:00

Seems like almost every guy does one of the two options at some point of their life.

Not at all. Plenty of guys only do relationships and plenty of other guys are able to get casual sex without making false promises of future commitment.

GridReXX · 2017-05-04T02:19:31+00:00

I don't see anything wrong with seeing an escort.

I do see something wrong with lying about wanting a relationship just to get sex and then leaving.

shoup88 · 2017-05-04T02:14:28+00:00

I think lying to women is "objectively" worse, but it's also the one I would prefer my SO to have done in the past. It may be worse because someone is getting hurt that didn't have to, but it's also way more normal.

uto-uto · 2017-05-04T02:16:37+00:00

going to go with the last question you asked, and say that i'd rather he saw an escort. neither of these are good, to be, but as others have said, there's no misunderstandings that took place with the escort vs. the girl who he lied to just to get into her pants. seems like a no-brainer.

TheChemist158 · 2017-05-04T03:06:53+00:00

Which one is morally worse

This question is very different from

Which one would you prefer your current/potential boyfriend to have done in the past?

Morally speaking, as long as the prostitute is of age and doing it of her own free will, I see nothing wrong with it. Stringing a girl along and lying is morally wrong and would be worse than seeing an escort. But if the escort is more of a sex slave, that would be much worse.

While I see nothing morally wrong with seeing a prostitute, I wouldn't want my boyfriend to have seen one. It's a pretty big negative. If I could choose neither, I would. But gun to my head, I would probably opt for the guy seeing prostitutes. Seeing prostitutes and having casual sex are pretty on par in my eyes. At least with the escort he's giving her what she wants in the end, implying he is a bit more of an honest guy. Maybe.

waciwazo · 2017-05-04T02:06:40+00:00

Lying to a woman. With an escort, there is an exchange that both parties agree to, and neither one is hurt. It should not be illegal.

Waleis · 2017-05-04T02:08:44+00:00

Lying to a woman. You're having sex on false pretenses. At least the escort isn't being deceived.

LeaderOfGamergate · 2017-05-04T03:37:01+00:00

I honestly have more respect for hookers and escorts than I do for women who deny they're sluts but demand full commitment. At least hookers know their worth and don't try to hide it, and monetise it in a fair and honest playing field. They don't play silly games like the average woman who sleeps around but demands commitment.

IIHotelYorba · 2017-05-04T03:47:30+00:00

Why are you comparing pump and dump to lying? The two have nothing to do with each other.

DupreeMcJones · Thu May 4 7:31:58 2017 UTC

I don't think lying about commitment is very common. Guys just stay silent on the issue and dodge the question a bit.

Wallstreet3 · 2017-05-04T08:38:29+00:00

Seeing escorts leaves less damage in your wake. These are escorts, not streetwalkers or lot-lizards. They do more than just sex. You get companionship at the club, dancing. Flirtatious talk. And then sex.

Pump and dump is deception. Using escorts is a simple transaction where both parties know what the other is all about.

Wolfsouls · 2017-05-04T13:42:27+00:00

Pumping and dumping is morally worse, but I'd still date a guy who has done that in the past, assuming he's changed and feels bad about it. I would never date a man who's seen an "escort" (prostitute).

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ManSentHisOwnWay · 2017-05-04T04:08:07+00:00

I think pump and dump is more often about leading someone on by implication than actual outright lying. Plus, leading someone on is far more usual than seeing a prostitute. I think most people will be okay with the former but not with the latter. Even though, if done right, prostitution doesn't have to be immoral at all. Can be a simple transaction.

Fijiwater69 · 2017-05-04T04:22:51+00:00

Honesty is good. Nothing wrong with seeing an escort I guess, though I'd likely think less of someone who used them in the usa seeing as how it's unregulated and illegal almost everywhere. You really decided to risk arrest to pay to have sex with a girl that could have any number of diseases?

disposable_pants · 2017-05-04T04:26:56+00:00

You're assuming that pumping and dumping by definition involves lying, even though it does not. It's simply sleeping with a woman and then deciding you aren't all that interested in seeing her again.

Zoidbergluver · 2017-05-04T04:50:43+00:00

Lying is much worse. I wouldn't date a guy who has done either of these things. I think prostitution should be legalized, but since it is used almost exclusively by low value men, I would not be interested in that man.

No. Not most men have done that. Only 7% of men are rapists, I don't know how many have seen a prostitute but a high estimation would be 10%.

SeemedGood · 2017-05-04T06:47:30+00:00

You really don't have to lie to women about committing in order for them to share their sexual energy with you. In fact, offering commitment first probably inhibits getting laid more than it helps.

Eastuss · 2017-05-04T07:19:30+00:00

What about there's no pumping and dumping and the dudes would stay if the woman was actually worthy?

Peter5930 · 2017-05-04T08:33:59+00:00

Pump and dump never entirely made sense to me as a concept. I mean, if if they're good enough to sleep with at least once, why would your game plan going into that situation be to sleep with them once and only once? A more sensible game plan is to sleep with them and see how it goes and whether you both agree afterwards that it was good enough to warrant a second go-around. Sometimes it's not good. Sometimes there's size issues or libido mismatches or personality clashes or differences in sexual tastes that weren't apparent before you were intimate and that's as far as things are going to go with that person, but that isn't a game plan, that's one possible and suboptimal outcome. Ideally, you sleep with a person and it goes fantastically and you sleep with them many, many more times.

tplg · 2017-05-04T12:17:58+00:00

Lying. The escort and the man have an agreement in which they both get something they want, there's nothing wrong with that.

MissMaude · 2017-05-04T18:04:34+00:00

Pumping & Dumping

Lying and manipulation is always wrong. But I don't think this is all that common. I think that often men are pretty honest about wanting things to be casual and women make assumptions. "Sure he SAID he's not going to be my boyfriend but we hang out all the time and I spend most nights at his house." Let's not normalize lying and manipulation... Hell, my husband has done the "we're not together, together but if you wanna come over you can..." to me. It's fine, he was being honest and my feelings were on me.

Seeing escorts

Ugh. There's just so much possible exploitation I couldn't move past it. My husband actually did voiceover work where he had to play a John (the dialogue was pulled from real emails/posts of men talking about sex workers) and he talks about it with such disdain which is a relief.

Title	Pumping & Dumping VS Seeing Escorts
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	2
Comments	86
Date	May 4, 2017 2:05 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/694to3/pumping_dumping_vs_seeing_escorts/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/pumping-dumping-vs-seeing-escorts.268376 https://theredarchive.com/post/268376

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