Why get married?

DemonConsulting · 2018-01-25T13:11:15+00:00

First of all the 50% divorce rate is of the total number of marriages, including second, third, fifth marriages of people who just can't make up their minds. The currenr divorce rate for first marriages is about 30% with worse odds for minorities, poor people, those without a college education, and those married at a young age and better odds for everyone to whom (most of) these don't apply.

Second of all this

in the other 50% you have the people on the honeymoon phase and deadbedrooms roommates, bored with each other and together only because of their children or for convenience.

Is a baseless asumption for the majority unless you can back it up with some actual sources. It seems to me like the majority dead bedroom situations are precisely the ones that get divorced while the ones without a dead bedroom and with reasonably happy marriages stay together.

As to your question, there are quite a few reasons why people get married instead of just being in a LTR (religion, children, legal stuff like taxes, immigration or health insurance, etc.) However that's only an issue for those who are already in a LTR and want to stay together and there is no reason why you should get married, if you don't want to.

The divorce rate had been dropping over the last decade, most likely because people are no longer expected to get married so those who dislike the idea of being tied to a partner don't rush into ill-advised arrangements like they used to. I do think that a good portion of the population are not fit for marriage or long term monogamy and should just stay single/ date people without getting married.

At the end of the day, you should only get married if you want to. There are practical reasons for it, there are legal circumstances that you will have a hard time working around without marriage and the divorce rate is by far not a 50/50 chance, nor are 5 those who stay married somehow universally bored or unhappy with eachother. But if you don't feel comfortable with marriage, you're probably one of the people who should not be getting married and that is perfectly okay in today's society.

Willow-girl · 2018-01-25T13:27:42+00:00

One reason to "make it legal" is to confer Social Security benefits on your spouse and kids (if applicable) in the event of your untimely demise. Also, if you're involved in any illegal activities, your husband/wife would not be compelled to testify against you. Finally, there may be tax benefits, especially as it relates to inheritance taxes and the transfer of property. (In my state, a cohabiting couple who own property jointly have to pay a whopping tax to the state if one person dies. Married couples are exempt from the transfer tax.)

squidracer · 2018-01-25T13:45:22+00:00

Don't get married. Marriage rates are dropping and there are currently more single people then married people.

The stigma of being single is long gone.

Electra_Cute · 2018-01-25T13:36:23+00:00

The question of "why get married?" that is asked ad nauseum on here is absolutely idiotic. The decision to get married is a personal choice, people are still clearly getting married, most people express intent to get married and want it.

Are humans really made for long-term monogamy?

Humans are "made" for long-term monogamy as much as they are "made" for driving a car or working a particular job, there is room for supplementation in humans.

wtknight · 2018-01-25T13:32:34+00:00

Marriage works for me. Personally, I can't picture in my head someone more suited for me than her. Besides, I'm a very reserved person, and I don't really enjoy the whole process of getting to know another person, so I don't see myself ever wanting to get to know anybody else.

On the other hand, I can see why people who are social and like to get to know other people might want more variety when it comes to a choice of mates, so I'm not quite sure why they get married so much besides social convention, religion and perhaps stability for children, although if one gets divorced then it usually makes things worse for those kids.

sublimemongrel · 2018-01-25T14:04:27+00:00

This again? We just had one of these literally yesterday.

Eastuss · 2018-01-25T13:38:51+00:00

Sadly:

So that if I die my wife, who has weak finances because of pregnancy and nurturing, can use my savings. Generally ease the whole legacy process.
So that my wife can use my name and dodge eventual discrimination/racism
So that I have more rights toward my son
Better handling of goods repartition when divorcing
probably other legal perks I'm not aware of

goatismycopilot · 2018-01-25T15:19:03+00:00

For fuck's sake we have had three trillion posts saying REEEEEEE marriage is bad for the menz the laydees just want to steal your resource. Fuck sluts! Just. Don't. Get. Married. Nobody cares.

GoonSquadMember · 2018-01-26T00:43:15+00:00

I never wanted to get married. The only reason I got married was that my wife was from another country and our long distance relationship was getting too expensive with all of the overseas plane tickets. We wanted to continue dating, so we got married. We've been married 5 years, together for 7. I think marriage has a lot of benefits, we have sex every night shes someone to talk to and do things with. We have a son together who I love. Sometimes I get bored, but the benefits outweigh the risks of going back on the dating scene. I was never comfortable dating strangers and have only dated my friends. Being on dating sites in my early 20s overwhelmed me because I would get hundreds of messages a day from guys and I would end up deleting the apps without reading all the messages, and not going on any dates. Marriage takes work, but it's worth it to me.

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ProgrammaticallyEgg · 2018-01-25T14:41:16+00:00

OMG dude.

If you're not cut out for marriage then don't get married. Just because you can't hack it doesn't mean that others can't and that others don't derive benefit from having someone to love and go through life with and always have their back.

No one is holding a gun to your head. Will you make a lousy partner? Then do yourself and everyone around you a favor and don't get married.

It's not for everyone.

goatismycopilot · 2018-01-25T15:19:56+00:00

Don't Marry. Don't Marry.Don't Marry. Don't Marry. Don't Marry. Don't Marry.

aNationofTwo · 2018-01-25T16:12:13+00:00

Your question seems slanted. Are you honestly asking why someone should get married?

[deleted] · 2018-01-25T21:52:09+00:00

I’m married and it only works because of how deeply I love her

I’m polygamous by nature like extremely so, her loyalty and love is worth the sacrifice for me

Fuck-your-misoginy · 2018-01-25T22:39:41+00:00

dont marry, no one will get hurt.

1UPZ_ · 2018-01-27T07:29:38+00:00

Humans adapt, so they can get bored with anything they spend time with or doing enough time.

With that said, the external environment and influences are PRIMARY reasons why couples divorce. Expectations from their partners change, they themselves change to something that is not desirable for their partner etc.... why?

Because humans are impressionable creatures.... we change, adapt, get influence etc.

Divorce rates are high, because mainstream media show that its "OK".... look at celebrity splits...

When in during the wedding ceremony... its CLEAR, the celebrant or priest ask both individuals to consider the "for better or worst" scenarios.... yet people split up with petty reasons.

The point is... humans change... they change because they are impressionable and adapt to their environment. Our environment shapes our thinking and our desires....

Do you think divorce rates would be high if the Mainstream Media condemns cheating, divorcing etc?

Of course not.

But the media, for the sake of sales and exposure, focus on controversial events and immoral events to attract attention, they glorify it... and in turn, people's perspective change.

On top of that... with social media.... STUPID people make STUPID people famous.... and those stupid famous people behave badly and the audience adapts to that bad behavior....

But to answer the OP...

People get married, well... because in the past at least... it was traditional.... also, its a step before having a family.... then it became a financial strategy, then it became a "status".... basically, women have to be married by a certain age to appease her social circle or atleast keep up with her friends.... Men get married because they feel that its the gateway to formally start a family.

Today?

Marriage is just an event, where the caterer, events venue owner, photographers, decorators etc. get to charge 5 times the normal rate for their services and products.

DaphneDK42 · 2018-01-25T12:52:04+00:00

What's so bad with divorce? It's like you think its the end of the world. I'd say if you have a good long run, raised a few kids and end on fairly amicable terms, then you had a successful marriage.

Maikowski2 · 2018-01-25T15:19:28+00:00

I always wanted a wife. Not kids, not some family bs, but having a wife, a person that is my "equal" (women will never be equal to men, get triggered radfems) and somebody waiting for me and caring for me even when I am in bad mood. I also like to care for people. Actually this is one of my weak sides, my women get "princess" status too quick. But fuck it, I like it. As long as it is appreciated.

But I will never get married, probably, since marriage without kids... which women gonna want that? I do not think I will ever want kids.

Title	Why get married?
Author	Minhoquento
Upvotes	16
Comments	136
Date	January 25, 2018 12:43 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/7svtcg/why_get_married/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/why-get-married.263859 https://theredarchive.com/post/263859

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