why ghost then

2023-04-13T12:04:15+00:00

Depends what the topic is, if a man interested in guns or cars and you start sharing your knowledge he might be “wowed” but not necessarily attracted to your knowledge on the topic.

Scared-Tea-8911 · 2023-04-13T12:41:28+00:00

They may feel threatened, or feel like you have masculine interests which don’t align with their desires for a woman. You may also be subconsciously putting them down or purposely “showing off” your knowledge for them to be “amazed”, which doesn’t always come across as feminine.

SunshineSundress · 2023-04-13T15:11:08+00:00

One thing we can apply from the men over at TRP is having a sense of abundance. If these are men who you’ve never met, or only been out with once or twice, it should not be upsetting you if they stop responding. It WILL happen - that’s just the nature of online dating and the digital age. If you continue to let this bother you, you’re going to have a pretty hard time dating.

Instead of putting these men you barely know on a pedestal, just see it as a random man who you barely know anyways who fizzled out of your life. I am 100% for dating multiple people until you start developing a bond with someone and consider exclusivity (this works better if you’re not sleeping with any of them yet - once you do, things get pretty complicated and it makes sense to stop seeing other people). That way, you are not so hurt when one of them decides, for whatever reason, not to be with you.

It seems like you just had a little bad luck streak. You truly don’t know what’s going on in these people’s lives - they could be feeling overwhelmed with work, they could have been dating someone else before you and things got more serious, their grandma could have died, etc. I wouldn’t take it personally unless this happens to the majority of men you date. Then you should probably consider if there’s some kind of off-putting behavior that you have that makes men not want to pursue anything further.

Wife_and_Mama · 2023-04-13T12:22:47+00:00

No one wants to talk to a know-it-all. You don't have to pretend you know less to stroke his ego, but it sounds like you might be coming across too abrasively.

kochIndustriesRussia · 2023-04-13T15:27:13+00:00

It's just making conversation while you're considering your options. Dude is probably chatting up a half dozen girls or so, running the same "wow, I'm so amazed..you impressed me" game on all of them, while he whittles down the herd to the 2 or 3 he really wants to pursue. We ghost because you have been culled and are no longer in the running.

Kyonkanno · 2023-04-13T20:53:46+00:00

This reminds me of the joke:

My wife just left me because I'm insecure.

nvm, she just went to get some groceries.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2023-04-13T16:07:45+00:00

Online relationships are subject to what I call the "Amazon Prime Effect". We want EXACTLY what we want and we want it within 24 to 48 hours. And if it turns out to be not what we wanted, we want to return it.

Online "relationships" aren't really relationships. We don't think of them as "real" yet (if we are smart, that is) because we're sitting at our computers or tapping on our phones and we are thus "in the Matrix" and not irl, where we tend to be more considerate of other people because they are "real" to us.

No-Statistician1782 · 2023-04-13T11:32:27+00:00

Either something you're saying to them is changing their minds later on or they're finding someone else they have a better connection with OR the connection with you just isn't strong enough to compete against whatever else they have going on in their lives.

You can self reflect on yourself and just work on you.

Real talk, as long as you're working on you you'll find someone that complements you perfectly one day.

confkim · 2023-04-14T22:53:16+00:00

gets bored tbh thats usually what happens they just realize theyre not as into you as they thought they were, sorry OP…

danhaas · 2023-04-13T13:32:48+00:00

It's more common for girls to become jaded in online dating, but it can happen to guys as well. That happens if your expectations are extremely low.

On the other hand, having high expectations is a recipe for disaster in OLD.

Try to be more forgiving for OLD messages. If he ghosts you on WhatsApp (or whatever you use for personal messages) then it's a different story.

Edited

jenna_grows · 2023-04-13T19:01:43+00:00

They saw you as a potential avenue of exploration and set themselves up for success if they chose to explore it. Then they decided they didn’t want to explore.

Also. Define ghosting. The guys that “came back” - what made you feel they ghosted you?

INFeriorJudge · 2023-04-13T11:43:49+00:00

Rather than a girl engaging with me in a knowledgeable manner on a topic I am passionate about, I would much rather she shows interest but allows me to be an expert on that subject. Asks questions, discusses the topic, but doesn’t fully push back or challenge me in that area. If I think I’m knowledgeable in something, I would prefer not to be shown up by a potential date/mate. Some other dude might call me out or demonstrate better mastery in that area but a girl doing that would make me see her as a dude, not a girl.

Even if it’s a minor area, or of no significance. My ego—and I believe that of many other men—wants to impress women and be competitive with other men. Not the other way around.

AutoModerator · 2023-04-13T11:15:17+00:00

Title: why ghost then

Full text: is 'im amazed' a code hahaha

Imagine talking to a guy, connecting, being interested in the same topics, same sense of humor. You say something knowledgeable about the thing he likes and he recognises you like it too/you do something which impresses him and he goes wow you've impressed me with this and then he ghosts.

This has happened to aprox 3 guys i've talked to and now im vary of that amazement effect, like if you're the one saying that, and everything up until was genuine connection why would u ghost me? Two have came back but i didn't respond and the third one happened today and hurt the most lol since i actually like him a lot

so, why bother communicating how wowed you are when you ghost the next moment

with guys who just talked and flirted i continued to text but for the third time?? that i've heard this i was ghosted

^{This is the original text of the post and this is an automated service}

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

CranberrySoftServe · 2023-04-15T18:10:14+00:00

How long are you talking for? Is this an online dating thing? Is it realistic to meet up to have an in-person date? Some dudes I know will block/remove/ghost women from apps after a certain amount of days if she isn’t willing to meet IRL.

eckarttollecanEAD · 2023-04-27T22:19:31+00:00

Was the topic "serial killers"? He was looking for a victim, not a fellow professional!

Title	why ghost then
Author	cekaosam
Upvotes	7
Comments	41
Date	April 13, 2023 11:15 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/12kld4w/why_ghost_then/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/why-ghost-then.1214330 https://theredarchive.com/post/1214330

Comments