Why do single mothers sabotage their children?

MattyAnon · 2017-03-21T01:48:20+00:00

It's all a game to these women. I don't know what her endgame is but it's a matter of spite. All women are like this. I know if i ever got divorced from my wife, no matter the picture I would be painted in the worst light and they would be used to hurt me.

wheresMYsteakAt · 2017-03-21T01:33:33+00:00

Same here. At first thinking these lesser men abandoned their kids. Then you get involved first hand and realize there are dudes paying child support still not able to see their kids if they piss the mother off, don't give a little extra for her other kids by other guys, the wind blows the wrong way,etc.

Same with amber alerts. Some(many)times it's the fucking father and the mother put the alert out.

MattyAnon · 2017-03-21T03:05:51+00:00

Why would any sane woman intentionally chase off a good father from their daughters lives!? Let alone a man who was trying to better himself educationally?

Because in her mind you're weak, because the state is stronger than you are. Once you're on the hook for child support, you yourself are no longer required.

Why would any sane mother intentionally try to destroy her daughters identity!?

They don't see it like this. You are not the father in her eyes, you're the mistake. Keep the child support coming though.

This isn't just me, there are so many great men, amazing fathers, obliterated from their children's lives, their children never allowed to reap all the positive benefits of having the love of a father. Many of these fathers genuinely wanting to be a part of their childrens lives.

Yup. Society has taken a massive step backwards in removing fathers from their children's lives.

After my break up & family court experience I look at "deadbeat dads" in an entirely new light.

Deadbeat dads are mostly a myth to give women more power, even HuffPo agrees: http://huff.to/1g1NPbq

aanarchist · 2017-03-21T09:03:13+00:00

because they are stupid, that's why they are single moms, and for the same reason they are bad parents. they have bad programs running in their head, no wonder they'd be bad parents they're the governments plaything.

trpthroway123 · 2017-03-21T02:00:35+00:00

Own up to your responsibility.

You sprayed a kid in some dumb ho. That doesn't make her less of a dumb ho, that just gives her leverage.

Get it in her hair, bust on her tits, spray in your hand and eat it for all I care, just don't shoot your load in the only hole that results in child support.

MrAnderzon · 2017-03-21T04:05:10+00:00

Wasn't there a post where the kid is always better off with the father than the mother.

untonyto · 2017-03-21T06:52:10+00:00

I would hate to experience such an ordeal. Stories like this make me quake at the threshold of LTRs, and to regard modern women with utmost distrust. They think they are clever but they are foolish.

mcr00sterdota · 2017-03-21T11:56:04+00:00

Oh god. I cannot stand the beta's that are created through single mothers. I was raised by a single mum and man has it fucked me up in so many ways.

DongleNocker · 2017-03-21T13:18:42+00:00

My own mother did this constantly to me in high school, my parent's divorce agreement state that she got to use the house as long as the children (I am the youngest) were still in high school. Next thing you know she actively hoping I fail my senior year, and all but actively sabotaging my schooling. After I told her "I am going to graduate, on time" she still went about life acting like I was going to flunk. So far to tell the social security administration (my father died shorty after the divorce) that I was going to flunk and to keep the death benefits rolling in, which caused me great trouble to get them to stop sending the checks and later trouble when they demanded that I repay them the money for checks that I didn't cash/deposit.

Oriiso · 2017-03-21T13:01:08+00:00

I was a blue pill up until about 2 years ago. Very introverted and very subservient. I was divorced 5 years ago and lost both my kids. At the time I made good money, spent time with both my kids. Pretty good father and i washed dishes, did laundry.. The works. She found herself some biker jerk off and the women she worked with convinced her to drop me for this low life scumbag dude. So her friend with 15 different husbands and her mom who was unhappy with her own marriage convinced her of leaving me. The things I was accused of were absolutely insane. I was accused of abuse and doing drugs. Small offhand jokes I would make were used against me. The guy she left me for only lasted 3 months. She now married with her 3rd kid on the way. I havnt seen my kids since then. Homelessness caused me to move across the country and she refuses to let me talk to them. Using them as a weapon. Since I've found TRP I've gotten my dream job. I've worked on myself , I understand women SO much better. I've slept with more women than I could have ever imagined and I can look back and see what a little bitch I was. Had I found TRP all those years back, I would still have my family for sure.

Frenetic_Zetetic · 2017-03-21T14:19:26+00:00

Imagine if the state punished women for cheating/leaving a man she is married to...especially if there's children involved; culture would shift REAL fast.

Too bad the revenue is fatter with our current system. Fuck, this shit makes me sick!

LiveFreeorDieMAGA · 2017-03-21T07:01:59+00:00

They tell themselves they're good mothers because their ego can't take it. Few people could.

The reason she chased you off, is probably due to her own issues and nothing to do with you. If she comes from a divorced family then she's probably subconsciously trying to replicate that. If you weren't confrontational enough, she hamstered reasons un-consciously to find fault with. If she's insecure in what she deserves, then she probably self-sabotaged, because she either didn't think she was worth it, or you made her feel bad about herself because you're that much better than her.

When I was BP i had oneitis for a girl from a divorced family. Obviously I was the shoulder to her emotionally abusive BF who would cheat on her constantly. The only reason I can fathom why she still chased him, was because of lack of self-respect, and the fact that we want to recreate the relationships with our opposite sex parent. So she was chasing her absent father vicariously through him. Now this is fairly common knowledge, but a little rarer knowledge is that girls like mine, don't want to actually catch their father. The chase for them is finding an absent man like their father then trying to bring him home. When they've done that, the chase is over and he's no longer her father figure. So she goes back on the hunt. Repeat until she gains self-knowledge of what she's actually doing, typically post wall if at all.

Sandman616 · 2017-03-21T01:36:07+00:00

don't have children out of wedlock

wsba910am · 2017-03-21T05:37:49+00:00

I would like to suppose that not all single mothers do this. Mine did.

Looking dispassionately at her, because she is so dishonest I don't know what really happened to her in childhood, she has said over and over that having kids was the best thing that ever happened to her. After failed relationships, lost jobs, a divorced husband she hates, and etc her sad life.

Her life really is sad. But not for those reasons she uses to prick people's pity. It's sad because of how evil she is (and being a single mom doesn't mean the gal is evil, but the media account that all single moms are angels is just fiction) ..... and how she treats people who see who she is.

I used to be just like her but by the favor of God I came back to the land of the living. She is literally crazy. But I think the reason she eats her kids minds alive is because of some sense of deep insecurity. A mother feels for her kids in ways no man can. Me being a man I can intellectually empathize but I cannot feel it probably as she can. She needs to have kids who love her, who are there for her, who stabilize her, etc. and she does not see what a monster she is. So when I called her out on it she went ballistic and threatened lawsuits and called the FBI on me. Her firstborn child. Her own reputation matters to her than I do. This need she should have given to God and her husband.

But she does not have the wherewithal or maturity to take them even to a therapist. She doesn't see herself.

AtlantaWeddingDJ · 2017-03-21T02:22:55+00:00

Usually it's a cycle. Gotta look at how they were raised as well as the generations before them. Hope it gets better for you!

jonknownothing · 2017-03-21T07:38:09+00:00

domestic violence, child abuse, being a drug addict

Have you ever do drugs or hit your kid/wife?

2kute42 · 2017-03-21T12:52:56+00:00

You should have seen the red flags from her mom

wanderer779 · 2017-03-21T14:21:38+00:00

The deadbeat dad label is usually bullshit in my experience. They are out there are, but I've seen 3 times as many stories like yours.

I am not sure what the point of it all is. It's obvious that the policies we've implemented have been a disaster. I think around 1/3 of kids have no father present in their lives now. I know that there were situations in the past where women were stuck with men who were abusive. However I wonder what the actual numbers on that are? My guess is probably 1 in 10? And my guess is that if men are living in a system where they can earn a good wage, have rights and be respected, that number goes down to almost nil. Contrary to the feminist narrative, very few men are innately evil. So they fucked up half the families in this country to save a very minute percentage of them.

Also, as with many policies, second order effects were not adequately investigated before implementing change. The 'best interest of the child' policy sounds good for a single case. But what happens when a generation of male children watch the men in their society being thrown out of their homes and families (but still require them to pay for them)? What is the incentive to be a good family man? What type of attitude are these men going to have about family and marriage and women? You can answer that question by browsing this subreddit.

If you start thinking about this issue you will really start to see the holes in the philosophy of the left. Ostensibly they are a party for working class people and a check on the right who are the pro-business side. Instead they have morphed into a party whose main concern is identity politics. Women have to be kowtowed to at all times. Men, especially white ones, are evil. I don't know if I've heard them mention a single initiative to help poor white men in my entire life, which is nearly half over. The result is you have this enormous epidemic problem that is crushing working families, but the working people's party can't address it because it would mean taking some power away from women.

I don't see much sign of any of this getting better either. The left seems to be incapable of any introspection. They quickly explained away their failure at the election as being due to racism and misogyny, or maybe and lack of voter turn out or maybe bad messaging on their side. There was never any mention that maybe something was wrong with their policies. Basically if you didn't vote for them you were either stupid or evil.

I think I could rant on this forever but it's probably time to stop now as it does absolutely no good. Since there is no sign of any of this changing I would recommend following TRP and keeping yourself safe.

prodigy2throw · 2017-03-21T19:29:15+00:00

That's like asking why retards can't do math

Ovadox · 2017-03-21T04:51:00+00:00

Because society, their families, and men in their life can no longer beat them.

Roaring40sUK · 2017-03-21T09:11:34+00:00

This isn't just me, there are so many great men, amazing fathers, obliterated from their children's lives, their children never allowed to reap all the positive benefits of having the love of a father.

This is what happens when women get power (of the state).

Like you, one of the hardest things I have had to come to terms with is that my ex would rather break up the family than "try".

Of course this is Bluepill hamstering as we know, but you cant help but think about this shit.

ZuruckDerMac · 2017-03-21T09:17:48+00:00

I'm so sorry to hear that brother. It is messed up completely. I went through something similar, but not as bad. I have to have supervised visitation, but on because she wants to control me still and doesn't want me to have a true one-on-one relationship with my son. She wants to be involved.

Lawyer up. Fight it. The courts do recognize this behavior, IF you speak up and fight for your right. Believe it or not, the courts focus on the best interest of the child. And that normally means having a relationship with BOTH parents.

I'll pray for you brother. Stay strong.

_Cold_Hands_ · 2017-03-21T09:29:47+00:00

Now the cunt from cuntland is out of your life your only connection is your daughter who you should pay 100% attention to. Take her out as much as you can and buy her nice things. Never forget her and always say you love her and remind her you're her real dad. The mum will try anything to sever the link between you too. Lies never prevail

dicklord_airplane · 2017-03-21T19:26:55+00:00

For guys who dont have much experience with dysfunctional, sabotaging families: stay the hell away from women who come from shitty families. They are almost certain to resemble their parents after the honeymoon period ends. Sirens should be sounding in your head when you find that her family is difficult.

A girl says her dad is/was an asshole? Danger!

A girl says that her mom is hard to deal with? Danger!

A girls mom has had multiple failed marriages or has kids with multiple men? Danger!

Her mom says anything negative about men or relationships with men? Danger!

It pains me to say this because its not their fault that they were born into shitty families, but the fact remains that they are very likely to turn out just like their parents. Ive given chances to too many girls from bad upbringings, and it has blown up in my face 100% of the time.

Dont be captain save-a-ho. Dont get into a relationship with a girl if you need to change the values she inherited from her family in order to have a functional relationship.

I wish more young men were told this. Its sad to see guys get blindsided when a girl's true self finally shows after its too late to eject unscathed.

Knives91 · 2017-03-21T12:07:53+00:00

It's not a question of why they do it, it's a matter of why do you let it happen to you. You said so yourself, the mother has 4 children with 3 different dads. What made you think your ex would be any different?

Daddie0 · 2017-03-21T12:35:54+00:00

I had a friend years ago who's wife cheated on him (they had a son together during their marriage), they got divorced and the ex-wife moved in with the guy she cheated on him with and eventually married him.

My friend goes to pick up his son one day and he can tell something is bothering the kid. When he asks he tells him that he is confused because they want him / pressuring him to call her new husband "Daddy".

When he went to drop the kid back off he had a conversation with her about it, and she got pissed off at him, telling him it was none of his business!

This same woman had to nerve to send me a friend request after they were divorced. Shows how clueless some people can be.

Metaleka · 2017-03-21T12:46:53+00:00

I recently was in a LTR with a single mother. It astonishes me on how manipulative they can be and she thought she was the one wearing the crown perfectly. She wanted me to adopt her son because her BD was a piece of shit. One night she was intoxicated and told me of a plan to get her BD to sign adoption papers. She and her son were going on a Disney Cruise and release papers needed to be signed by the sons father. She was going to tell her BD that the papers he was signing was release papers, but they were actually going to be adoption papers to give up his rights. If I would have known about TRP at the time I would of ghosted on the spot. It's insane on how these singles mothers think. Always thinking they're the perfect mother with absolutely zero flaws.

Dio_Brando_Joestar · 2017-03-21T14:31:02+00:00

Sounds like you're ex is latina ?

I'm Hispanic man and I avoid Hispanic women because a majority of them are like this.

thedaynos · 2017-03-21T15:34:26+00:00

The mother was a dumb whore and MANY parents worst fears is that their kids are going to be better than them. All they have is their kids to boss around because the regular people in their lives leave when they can. Kids only have one set of parents. They can physically leave, but they can never emotionally leave.

In this case, it's obvious the mother was raised wrong and is a slut whore. She really knows no better. The daughter feels guilt because hey, this is my mother and she knows better, and i'm all she's got. It's up to you to recognize this and explain it as best as possible to your gf. Give your own context, give a story about how you're turning into your father and give a good example on why that's a bad thing. This might cause her to look at herself and recognize that she doesn't really want to be that whore herself.

telenoobies · 2017-03-21T15:59:43+00:00

None single mothers do it too... seems like they are never content with what they have.

Somethingwrong22 · 2017-03-21T16:25:42+00:00

It's absolutely sickening. I'm a single dad myself and so far things have went ok between my ex an myself. However, her mum is very much in the "if he doesn't like it, tough shit" mentality. That gets thrown around a lot when I have a suggestion or an issue with anything regarding my son. Luckily my ex isn't really buying into it at the moment (long may it last). Co-parenting should be about the kid and the kid only. Parents should be able to put their differences aside for the kid. Sadly, some women are just out to cause a world of hurt. My friend tried to kill himself because his ex turned crazy and spread lies about him when in all honesty he is a fantastic dad. Too many good fathers out there literally dying to see their kids. I hope in time things get better for you my friend.

Original_Dankster · 2017-03-21T16:37:05+00:00

I look at "deadbeat dads" in an entirely new light.

I got a vasectomy years ago so it wouldn't apply to me, but in theory if I ended up in your situation, I'd liquidate all my assets, and fuck off to the Philippines.

yomo86 · 2017-03-21T18:45:25+00:00

Ok the automod got me, so here is my post again:

I really do recommend you to read "You got a stranger pregnant what now" it is on the sidebar in askTRP, obviously you can skip the getting pregnant part. The author talks about the custody battles and the inner mood or setting you should get yourself into. It works. I advised on of my basketball fellows the same way when his divorce came through. From a lawyer's standpoint: CPA and the courts are used to the domestic violent and abuse accusations as part of the game, there will be no bias against you (besides the bias already included in the system against men) unless you give them reason to. You should deny them but act with the utmost respect - be the perfect courtier so to speak.

Liam442 · 2017-03-21T17:09:33+00:00

Your story reminds me of my own story, I was raised by a single mother myself. I also experienced my mother trying to remove any trace of my father from my life. She would always tell me how my father was a bad man and how I should just ignore him and remove him from my life. Even though this all started from a very young age, I knew it was bullshit and eventually left my mother when I was older. But just like you said, like your exgf believes she is doing a wonderful job, so did my mom. She believed she was doing the best for me she could but only I knew better.

Kalidane · 2017-03-21T10:01:16+00:00

You want a rational reason for her irrational behaviour?

At this point you're playing stupid games to win stupid prizes.

Walk away man.

redaftrp · 2017-03-21T11:59:43+00:00

Crabs in a bucket mentality, I didn't have a good relationship with my father, so you don't get to have one with your(kid's) father. Or in the case of my Ex, I didn't have a good relationship with (Ex's mother) therefore Ill be absent in (my kid's) life. Thankfully I caught a break when I returned from Afghanistan and I was able to get custody (Full legal and primary physical) in 4 months. It took very little work on my behalf oddly enough. Apparently abandoning your child to your ex-husband and cutting all contact with your kid for 3 months will annihilate your chances in family court, didn't help she refused to lawyer up.

ransay3277 · 2017-03-21T15:31:21+00:00

They really don't try to sabotage their children. It's an inevitable byproduct of leading a shitty life.. Just as happiness is the byproduct of leading a good life, their miserable and destructive lives breed horrible offspring.

TryhardPantiesON · 2017-03-21T16:05:45+00:00

Because Americans live in a nanny state, which encourages women to drop their husbands knowing that they will get custody of the kids and get half of his money and assets. If i am not mistaken, women have to drop their husband and NOT live with another man if they want to collect welfare. This only destroys the family.

They are also told that they are equal to men, they are told to be strong and independent, instead of being dependent of a husband.

dumstick · 2017-03-21T16:14:26+00:00

I'm in the exact same situation but kids side. I'm so sorry to say but she won this round. The only thing that is going to lead you to victory is if you adhere to the visitation and try not to fight the mother. In due time the daughter will hopefully see how unusual her mother is and be curious about you. It's around that time you can tell her the truth and start your real relationship with your daughter . Again I'm so sorry that this happened to you. But if you fight the mother she will demonise you to the daughter and you loose the long term too .

test822 · 2017-03-21T18:30:23+00:00

animal mothers have an instinctive urge to kill or hurt their own children if there isn't a father around to help raise them.

it's sort of an attempt to cut your losses and free yourself up to try and find a new man.

a good movie that demonstrated this was Lars Von Trier's "Antichrist". in it, the woman ends up spending a lot of time away from her husband, and her subconscious animal mind reads this as abandonment, so she starts getting the urge to hurt her son. her concurrent research on witchcraft and how the puritans saw women as the devil, mixed with her own horror at her own instinctual urges to hurt her kid, drive her insane.

edit: oh, your post was more about your ex replacing you with a different dude entirely. idk, but I'm not sure that really counts as "intentionally sabotaging her child"

redribbongoku · 2017-03-22T04:01:05+00:00

If you look at it from an evolutionary perspective, there is naturally a dynamic equilibrium that is reached between the mother's interests and the father's. In general, if a guy is good for the mother, he is good for the daughter (at least back in the day), so it would make sense that if she doesn't like you personally, she will instinctively try to keep you away from her daughter. Now, some women override those instincts consciously, but others give way to them, which seems to be the case.

Single motherhood is not a natural condition, to put it bluntly. Back in the day, you either had tribes where everyone took care of everyone else with tight-knit social groups or you had widows and divorcees clinging to the first man that would take them. The rise in divorces and break-ups during child-rearing years is actually really bad for kids.

falconpush · 2017-03-21T12:54:27+00:00

[deleted]

Your_Coke_Dealer · 2017-03-21T19:39:35+00:00

Let her BB take the kid. No child support for you then

[deleted] · 2017-03-21T16:56:42+00:00

All single moms right?

Ignorant as #@!#

yes_we_can_t · 2017-03-21T09:59:51+00:00

[deleted]

Why do single mothers sabotage their children?

Comments

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Title	Why do single mothers sabotage their children?
Author	jizzledfreq
Upvotes	175
Comments	183
Date	March 21, 2017 1:24 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/60kq8r/why_do_single_mothers_sabotage_their_children/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/why-do-single-mothers-sabotage-their-children.41953 https://theredarchive.com/post/41953