Really don't know whats wrong with me.

BigBoyTouche2799 · 2020-09-14T03:09:44+00:00

Isolating yourself in your room can leave you with this sense of loneliness and depression. Idk dude. Always keep up with anybody who may turn out to be a friend and actually be nice and communicate with your family. You could just start by leaving your room and working around the house and doing stuff. Try to join bootleg flag football team or something. Go to bars with a friend or two on weekends if they’re open. Go on walks. This time isn’t healthy for anyone but you should start by taking initiative and finding things to do like hobbies, sports, or volunteering. Sounds lame but this is life.

failingtheturingtest · 2020-09-14T05:07:10+00:00

"I feel like I'm a fun guy" who chooses to avoid fun...

You're not tired, you're bored and lacking direction. Stop waiting for motivation to hit, waiting to be invites to something cool, waiting to be dragged out of your hole into some miraculously fun life just because you feel like you deserve more. Go and fucking take more.

Take action like your life depends on it, because it does.

Go and fucking lift. We all know you don't have a good gym routine (or maybe any). It's hard to have a shitty day after spending 45+ minutes getting blood pumping, adrenaline surging and pulling twice your bodyweight of the ground.

And stop worrying about girls cheating on you. Worst thing about this sub is the fearmongering that women are going to castrate you and steal all your shit. My car is going to die one day and need replacing, but it's useful now. My underwear will get tired, old, and probably have holes before I throw it out, but I like wearing underwear. I make my bed each morning even though I'm going to mess it up again each night.

Stop letting the fear of losing shot stop you from enjoying it while it lasts.

grayonede · 2020-09-14T05:31:42+00:00

Take a break from red pill. Sometimes it can get too rational and fear-based here. Come back to red pill after your love for life comes back. And when you do, pick and choose what you actually apply to your life. You don't have to listen to everything on here

TheBadGoy · 2020-09-14T04:04:51+00:00

Low testosterone and lack of sun

gotmilo11 · 2020-09-14T03:42:18+00:00

There's nothing wrong with you.

You are just making dumb decisions and carrying through dumb actions.

Make smarter choices and decisions.

Take risk amigo.

Read my journey through hell post; it'll help you.

RevolutionaryPea7 · 2020-09-14T08:27:44+00:00

Do you even lift? Are you ripped? Forget women just get out and fulfill your potential as a man. You need a project. Women sit at home watching Netflix all day. Men do shit. Work on your body for starters.

balalasaurus · 2020-09-14T15:19:28+00:00

You have victimized yourself and now come asking us why you are a victim. You make excuses for why things will go wrong before you have even made attempts at them. Stop complaining and start actually doing something with your life.

cat_magnet · 2020-09-14T04:38:20+00:00

It's sounds like you don't have any meaningful mission in your life. When you have a pursuit you are passionate about other people are drawn to that energy and positivity.

Yashugan00 · 2020-09-14T08:52:23+00:00

"because im tired"

Stress will tire out even the fittest person quickly. It has a draining effect.

I do my best mental work when my body is fit.

Stress creates cortisol, which inhibiting your T levels. Gym will counteract that.

"I always have a positive outlook in life, but recently that just died out of nowhere. "

Depression is a sneaky ninja that creeps up on you. People often don't recognise it, and don't realise it's happening to them. You know what helps get you out of the haze. Gym/sport, will create endorphines and make you feel good again.

Feel like a broken record, sorry for that. But it helped me so much.

Spartawolf · 2020-09-14T11:37:52+00:00

Cut out the netflix and shoot for hobbies. Don't cut out your social circle and get involved more. From the sounds of it if you're being honest with yourself you have the personal traits to get laid, you're just minimizing your opportunities to do so. Your gameplan should be to increase those opportunities, meet more people and aim for at least 1 approach each time.

JohnQData · 2020-09-14T13:03:57+00:00

I feel you man, I’m 27 in a similar situation; spend all the time at home, mostly do work from Monday - Friday, on weekends I do chores, play PS4 or watch Netflix. Social life is almost inexistent, I have two friends, but I see them very rarely. Only have had sex with one woman, was in a LTR with her for 4 years. Would like to meet new people, make new friends, have a girlfriend but COVID is making this even more difficult. I try to focus on being productive on my work instead and keeping healthy habits but I get to points where I just get tired of it and abuse myself with masturbation, porn, social media, drugs...only to bounce back to disciplined me once again so the cycle continues...

Aw0lManner · 2020-09-14T05:31:53+00:00

I feel you man. I struggle with this too. Ultimately, you gotta have mental toughness and resilience. There's shit you're not good at, things you're not doing right now. You have to form a long-term mental picture, and work on what you can do right now to get there.

For me, it was a transition into one of my hobbies. It gets depressing sometimes when I'm alone in my room doing the same thing day after day without any external validation or significant progress (kind of like how you won't grow huge muscles after a month), but when I think of the long-term outlook if I keep on my purpose (e.g. being semi-professional at it, and being at a level where I can have fun with others doing it) that refreshes me and motivates me to wanting to do it again and gets me out of that depressed state. It keeps me from playing video games or watching netflix, etc.

I'm not saying this is the best solution, just mine. Of course, you can always be more social, plan things, and not make excuses, but for me doing hobbies seemed to be the best thing to do. I will have to ramp back up on the social stuff though in a couple months.. I'm kind of socially retarded right now ngl lmao.

distraff · 2020-09-14T05:46:38+00:00

Covid is a bummer. One thing you can do is learn a skill or improve yourself in some way while we are all at home. Once its gone cancel your Netflix and get out there.

KillaJewels · 2020-09-14T11:21:23+00:00

Use that time after work to challenge yourself - select some things you want to improve on in your life, read up and watch vids, then execute. Do it one thing at a time. Hold yourself accountable.

Something fun and challenging I can recommend to accelerate the process is to do a 30-day challenge, i.e. 2 days on 1 off workout challenge for 30 days, cold approach everyday for 30-days, cook 1 new meal each day for 30 days, diet challenge for 30 days, reading, etc.

3dasak · 2020-09-14T13:20:36+00:00

Check your vitamin levels

laiyaise · 2020-09-14T14:09:38+00:00

This is what worked for me. Your body is in a sad state, that is why it feels like shit and you're tired all the time. When your body is in a good state it will naturally want to do things, it will want to exercise, it will want to socialize. Focus on your meat vehicle and you'll find 90% of the mental shit ends up being physiological.

Start off with Vitamin D. If you work in an office all day, stay inside when you don't, have black skin, you're probably more deficient than a holocaust survivor. Aim for a low inflammation diet, inflammation makes your body anxious and irritable. Start with unprocessed foods and go from there, rule of thumb is if it has more than 5 ingredients it's probably processed. Make sure you're drinking mostly water.

Try lessen or get rid of high dopamine activities that you suspect is fucking up your neurochemistry. Delete porn, watch less Netflix, less social media, less phone, less video games, and so on. If your dopamine receptors are fucked you'll not want to do anything and have zero drive. Porn is especially horrendous in this regard, it's like your water supply is spiked with shit that's sedating you, get the fuck away from it, and you won't have a problem wanting to fuck anything that moves.

If you aim to do these things, even slowly chipping away at them over time, you will not have a problem with feeling tired anymore. Don't worry about fucking up, the only way to fail is to not get back on the saddle. I won't even need to tell you to lift (which you should be doing because there's nothing more satisfying than feeling like you can snap some cunt in half after deadlifting a PR) because you'll just want to do it. You will naturally assume a confident and low stress state which people will be able see through your body language, which you won't even think about.

319Skew · 2020-09-14T15:28:54+00:00

You're stuck in a negative feedback loop and your outlook is destructive. You don't go out and you rationalize why. It doesn't sound like you've got any positive or interesting things and that may make you boring to hang out.

So you're boring, average looking (which isn't particularly attractive), and depressed. These things are people repellent so you become more lonesome. You rationalize your position and excuse the behavior to avoid addressing it.

If you're having problems with making friends, dating, escalating, etc. It's always best to look inward and change. So what can you do?

Additionally, the whole logic of 'shell just cheat' is bullshit excuse. You can use the excuse of fear of loss for everything. What's the point of having a family if she'll leave? What's the point of getting a job if you'll get fired or laid off? What's the point of getting a motorcycle if you'll get into an accident? What's the point of working out if you'll just stop down the road? Leading your life through fear is just a way to ensure that you don't live but exist through yours.

Finally, it's OK to be sad and depressed at times. It's OK to be feel some emotional jealousy or envy. People these days are quick to only seek happiness in life and abhor any other emotion. That's not practical or healthy. Allow yourself to acknowledge it and process that feeling and then move the fuck forward.

You're young, you have options, you have dozens of years to enjoy YOUR life and no one here is going to come over to your house and give you an action plan to follow and live.

What a higher lay count, go out and meet women. Want to make friends. Go out and make friends. Want to improve your looks? Dress better and lift more.

There's a wonderful side bar with a crap load of game, tips, tricks and actionable ideas. Read up on that and apply it OUTSIDE.

Remember that your life is IN YOUR CONTROL. We can sit here and give you all ideas but YOU NEED TO DO THEM and you have a FINITE amount of time to action it off.

Best of luck.

UltimateCrypto · 2020-09-14T16:10:22+00:00

You’re just in a rut. You have to start hitting the gym and find a hobby that gets you excited.

Laying around all day watching Netflix is what fat lazy broke people. Stop doing what fat lazy broke people do or you’ll turn into one.... wait.

XXXMersenne · 2020-09-14T17:10:17+00:00

Keep lifting, go out & kinder a flame of hilarity with whatever "acceptable" social contacts you have left. If you know what you're doing like you say:

an extrovert not afraid to start plans, don't need alcohol to get lit and have fun

It won't take long before you snowball from mutuals.

Walking back from work earlier I ruminated on how I've kinda wasted this entire year juggling all sorts of shit & the cost benefit of cute college chicks I could've been tonguing down in various Beer Gardens. It. Sucks. So get crackalackin man

That is, unless you have other plans & this is a Ruse so proficient that even your conscious mind has been duped?

STFU. 30mins+ sun daily, weight training, Gallons water, CHUGG down dark green & leafy juices for a massive mood boost.

A social circle of sorts is an extrememly powerful leverage for enforcing all those because from within you are greatly encouraged to keep your shit together, better yet, to be in a surplus of energy in order to be and intensely uplifting presence around them.

AllMyHoesWearJoggers · 2020-09-14T17:56:21+00:00

Lift

absolutelynp · 2020-09-14T19:23:02+00:00

watch south park season 15 episodes 7 and 8. because it sounds like growing up to me and this will give you some perspective

NexusReflexX · 2020-09-14T21:04:00+00:00

Learn to enjoy being alone.

Optionsmfd · 2020-09-14T21:54:53+00:00

buy yourself a used bike and start riding.

fresh air.......... great exercise...... plus maybe meet people that also ride

gotmilo11 · 2020-09-14T23:58:30+00:00

[deleted]

dutchgguy · 2020-09-15T02:11:04+00:00

try to meet some people

Omardumet · 2020-09-15T14:22:52+00:00

You can have the cure for cancer but if you keep it in your room no one will ever buy it

DatDudePB · 2020-09-16T04:19:36+00:00

Move to a fun city, get a nice apartment with a pool for the summer. Bam you have friends

cunningcaring · 2020-09-14T10:14:07+00:00

Hobbies and education. Get on it.

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Nergaal · 2020-09-14T06:59:10+00:00

get a tribe. virtual interactions are not interactions

holyshocker · 2020-09-14T07:13:37+00:00

Lose the fake friends and work on you. Lose the envy, the fear of cheating. You can't control anyone or anything but you. If she cheats it's not the end of the world just move the fuck on to the next and find those red flags. Sitting home alone may seem safe but that's just the anxiety fucking your life up.

urbanfoh · 2020-09-14T07:46:27+00:00

I gave up finding a girlfriend because I don't see the point of having one if she's going to cheat, if I don't hold something that does not come natural to me (frame, kino, etc)

I think you overestimate how good you have to perform in a LTR. You can still have a long LTR by vetting properly or dating below your SMV or by raising your SMV during the relationship.

Sure you should not be a pussy but its not necessary to keep the PUA game up all the time.

If I were you, I'd start joinging some PUA group in your city. You'll also meet some fun dudes there and have a blast approaching girls. Then take your time, vet, go in a few dates and go on from there.

EXandRR · 2020-09-14T08:13:51+00:00

I think you answered your own question in the first paragraph

ntkstudy44 · 2020-09-14T08:28:20+00:00

Been in your situation, could give you a whole speal but the best advice that I can offer is that you need to get mad at life not sad

walleyworld · 2020-09-14T08:46:59+00:00

If you're so concerned with getting laid just hit up Fling, 2nd get hormone panel check test levels. MY advice would be pretty much keep lifting but maybe also hit some cardio up in the park for a bit. Start remembering faces so you can tell who is local and there on the regs after a few runs talk only in the parking lot, setup date anything to socialize. Winter is rolling in get that shovel out and help people with their snow problems, sounds weird but it's a good workout and you can meet a lot of folks and will have your choice of friends. Get yourself back in mental shape first because on the off chance you get laid I guarantee you onetis is going to own you. Hobbies bro.

Skinny_Wizard · 2020-09-14T09:13:54+00:00

Do something new everyday even if it is something small like changing your route to work. Then everyday do something bigger so you get out of your comfort zone and be more interesting.

jackandjill22 · 2020-09-14T12:40:19+00:00

What do you mean all your college friends are fake, what happened to your social life, I do understand that quarantine makes it more difficult. But that makes you seriously sound depressed.

Vynxe-Vainglory · 2020-09-14T13:26:48+00:00

First of all, you need to realize that you're not alone.

Many people are mentally going through a lot of isolation issues right now. And as you can see when you look on the internet, an entire world of communication with others is still at your fingertips.

Personally, I feel like it's a fantastic time to build discipline and inner strength; to focus on skill-building, growth-mindset, and embark on projects that will shape the trajectory of your life.

You have so much free time with no distractions (other than those imposed by a lack of discipline) or people expecting shit from you.

Trust me, use this opportunity while you can. This time alone with yourself to get creative and do some deep work on something you find interesting probably won't happen very often in your lifetime, if EVER again.

Make plans, get organized, figure out what kind of future you want to see, and create a step-by-step guide to making that happen.

Then, do step 1.

Rimefang · 2020-09-14T13:40:15+00:00

Your expectations are too high. If you expect anything, expect to be disappointed.

DrunkOldBear · 2020-09-14T13:54:14+00:00

Lack of optimism perhaps?

Are you tired when you are back from work? Is your diet fine? Too many carbs perhaps? Sugar?

Minerals? Sleeping enough? Give more data.

cglehosit · 2020-09-14T14:16:25+00:00

I feel you brother, specially the part on fake college friends post graduation. I’d write yourself a list of outdoor things you want to do between now and December and try to contribute one day a week to getting that list done. Stuff like fishing, visiting that trail you’ve heard everyone talking about but never tried, or just going to a park with a lawn chair and a book. Explore some cool spots so you have a couple good locations to share with people in the future. As for meeting those people, I’d try some clubs or hobby groups. If that doesn’t work, and you have time in the evening, try looking into some graduate evening classes and you’ll meet people there.

thatguyhanzel · 2020-09-14T14:18:57+00:00

There MUST be someone you know that has a solid friends group. Go out for drinks with him, they might invite you out with his boys. Once you have that comfort after a few months, then go for girls. You need that friendship confidence first

kollegah1337 · 2020-09-14T14:25:55+00:00

lemme give you fucking advice

find good friends you can talk about everything

fuck redpill, fuck everything and start being authentic which means not filtering any words that come in your mind

goodboy3245 · 2020-09-14T14:31:18+00:00

This post threw altogether a new meaning for me. You said you are very worried about your low body count, so if a virgin ( like me ) even manages to somehow lose it, I still be worried about low body count. Lol. I guess the worries never go away.

I am a complete shut in, but I don't worry about what other might be doing or what their numbers be right now. Who cares! Live your life man. Stop the comparison, coz it's endless. Maybe stop netfilx, find something you enjoy enough to stop feeling lonely, which makes you highly engaged. Maybe find a different career which is a bit less taxing. At the end of the day, only you'd have to take the initiative. And stop comparing with other guys coz life isn't fair, never was, never will be.

gotmilo11 · 2020-09-14T14:56:49+00:00

Pick up an instrument or learn something new. Since this quarentine started Ive been learning the guitar. Thats better than just sitting around consuming netflix. Also try reading more.

As for the social aspect, I completely understand. I still leave the house daily just to be around other people. I go sit at a coffee shop or hit up a local brewery. Yea the social energy isnt like it used to be but it beats sitting around inside.

I would also look into volunteering in your community. Theres a lot of pain right now in the country and maybe you could do some good in the community. I may be do the same because im lacking in the friend department also but thats because im living in a new country and volunteering is a great way to meet people while doing something important for others

Mr_Badass · 2020-09-14T15:41:09+00:00

Sounds like a Quarter Life Crisis.

Snowboard18 · 2020-09-14T19:04:48+00:00

If one things for sure, dealing with depression myself taught me this one key lesson...

Motivation is a fucking lie, discipline is what makes the greatest the greatest.

While depressed I would make excuses which were all based around not having enough motivation. Then I finally figured out that if I just sat around waiting for this magical motivation bs to hit me, then I’d never achieve shit or be happy again.

ma-agentz · 2020-10-02T09:30:49+00:00

start bjj

razenha · 2020-09-14T12:33:19+00:00

I am lonely as fuck. 25 year old living in my room with the lights off just straight up watching Netflix. Monday thru Friday I work a salaried job and come home just to sleep because im tired.

That's a classic sign of clinical depression. It might just be that you are just unsatisfied with your life, or maybe you have an imbalance in your brain chemistry. Seek help.

SmurfSC2TW2 · 2020-09-14T07:49:13+00:00

if you are 25 and not working 10 hours day to build up your network/ experience to make that plunge by 30, you have only 1 problem, you are too free.

go learn some online courses or something. or heck, just go outside and run 2km if you have time to post on reddit.

Title	Really don't know whats wrong with me.
Author	gotmilo11
Upvotes	104
Comments	136
Date	September 14, 2020 2:59 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/iscnte/really_dont_know_whats_wrong_with_me/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/really-dont-know-whats-wrong-with-me.213867 https://theredarchive.com/post/213867

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