After what date can you start discussion about exclusivity?

shittybillz · 2024-05-24T15:53:21+00:00

I initially thought you were a guy, and I was going to say, "Let her bring it up," because I feel like the girl bringing it up just works better.

Can you answer some questions for me? How old are you guys, how many dates have you been on, and have you slept together, and if so, how many times?

Answer those and I can give you an answer

harrysquatter69 · 2024-05-24T16:55:55+00:00

As a guy, if I really like the girl, I will try to see her once a week for 3 weeks.

After that I’ll have the more “what are you looking for” conversation. And if it’s the same and I want to escalate, I’ll move more for twice a week for another week or two.

From there, if I still really like her, I won’t waste much time in asking her for a relationship. So I’d say between 6-8 dates.

I wrote the above so you know what’s ~normal. But this guy does not want exclusivity with you.

MrAnonPoster · 2024-05-24T15:50:14+00:00

He is playing you. Move on

KingOnixTheThird · 2024-05-24T17:43:54+00:00

You start talking about exclusivity when the following conditions are met.

You like him enough to the point where the thought of seeing other people doesn't even cross your mind. If something in your gut is telling you to see what else is out there, then that's a sign that he's not the one for you.
You feel like you know him enough as a person to see that he is a good fit for you as a romantic partner. He doesn't possess any deal-breakers and there's no huge incompatibilities that you're seeing.

This process typically takes 1-3 month for when you two start talking to one another.

If it's been longer than 3 months and you're still hesitant about being exclusive with him, then that's a sign he's not the one for you and you should move on.

Blitted_Master · 2024-05-24T18:17:12+00:00

It’s on you to push for a relationship, you’re the woman. Push for it if you want it and see what happens.

g00g0lig00 · 2024-05-25T01:40:32+00:00

at least you’re not ted mosebying it

bannedcanceled · 2024-05-24T21:40:02+00:00

Girl logic. Im not sleeping with him but i want him to be my boyfriend

trifling-pickle · 2024-05-24T15:54:02+00:00

I think you can talk to him about it whenever you want, several months is a long time. It might be a good idea to think of how you will respond to him when he answers your questions. If-then questions, if he says he wants to be exclusive then what, or if he says he’s not interested then what, that way you will be a little more prepared for the conversation.

surfershane25 · 2024-05-24T16:48:27+00:00

I wouldn’t start with exclusivity when you’re getting no indication he wants that. Going on infrequent dates doesn’t suggest a desire for it. What I would do is see what he’s looking for and go from there.

bas4784 · 2024-05-24T17:15:23+00:00

There's never a prefect time to discuss it - the earlier the better imo - why waste time with someone who doesn't want what you want?

Girlinawomansbody · 2024-05-24T21:37:15+00:00

If he’s the right one you don’t discuss it after any particular date it just happens. You both just know that you only want one another. Is that isn’t happening naturally they’re not your person x

nerospawen · 2024-05-25T04:39:14+00:00

I know she’s the one I want after the first date tbh buys that’s just me

ArcaneAces · 2024-05-25T11:32:36+00:00

Just ask him what he wants if it's not what you want, then move on.

EddyStarkFit · 2024-05-31T01:36:57+00:00

Depending on your intentions and the scenario you see in front of you, it might be wiser to ask early on what is he up to as a conversation topic, as asking if he usually dates exclusive an so on... So you can shorten the ordeal if you feel it might be a trap.

Usually good guys get defensive at first mainly because of bad past experiences, also not wanting to demonstrate lower value or seem to be too eager to commit in order to avoid turning you off. It is not necessarily a red flag, think of it as a genuinely nice girl holding off sex on the first weeks of dating, because she likes the guy that much and don't want him to see her as an easy lay, even if she feels he is the one, wants to show affection and connect immediately.

In case you want to go for a LTR, then being sincere, demonstrating interest in helping him in his life, signaling loyalty and willingness to commit before requesting exclusivity tend to make men more willing to accept exclusivity earlier on in the relationship.

PeanutAnnual6119 · 2024-05-24T15:23:06+00:00

You'll get better advice in a dating advice forum and not this one... this forum is for autistic 25 year old and under children that can't get laid and are scared shitless to leave their houses and talk to people in the real world.

This is not a forum for women seeking relationship advice.

DependentAd1504 · 2024-05-24T18:10:19+00:00

After An*l I guess is probably the right time.

Available_Bass9725 · 2024-05-24T16:02:29+00:00

After tenth date.

Title	After what date can you start discussion about exclusivity?
Author	NectarineLate5884
Upvotes	8
Comments	32
Date	May 24, 2024 3:15 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1czn530/after_what_date_can_you_start_discussion_about/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/after-what-date-can-you-start-discussion-about.1519394 https://theredarchive.com/post/1519394

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