I invited a girl out to breakfast after work, and she gave me an excuse. I teased her, and wished her a good night. Did her next response leave room for something else? [recovered]

Master_Musician_223 · 2022-07-07T14:11:59+00:00

Not a good move to ask a woman to wait for an hour. She is just pointing that out to you. Don’t overthink

Ok-Share-8775 · 2022-07-07T13:54:35+00:00

Pretty cringe bro, don’t say stuff like that again

TechnoGeek423 · 2022-07-07T17:23:04+00:00

What on earth is a man dime?

Edit: just googled. So cringe. You don’t have to be that try-hard. I know teasing is seen as an end-all but it works best in moderation. Don’t come across like a clown.

ignitedwolf9200 · 2022-07-07T19:17:12+00:00

“Wow, i can’t believe you’re turning down breakfast with a man dime. Jk have fun with your friend and have a good weekend.”

Okay, my guy… this line is SO fucking cringey. Am i the only one that sees that? I am a woman and if a guy said this shit to me I would not even look at him as a potential suitor.

I’d even argue that this is a weird form of negging. Yikes.

Nefertiti2021 · 2022-07-07T14:53:12+00:00

Never say shit like that again:

have fun with your friend and have a good weekend!

choad_the_cat · 2022-07-07T13:47:30+00:00

Who was the man dime?

YourDustyLampshade · 2022-07-07T14:15:59+00:00

Is there any reason you didn’t just invite her to breakfast in person? But yeah, next time it would be better to find a place that is open. And I get that you were just having some fun and whatnot but don’t ever say anything like that again.

KidKannabis · 2022-07-07T15:34:33+00:00

It seems like you're pushing it a bit too hard

Waiting an hour after work to eat isn't convenient, so that is a valid excuse. Also don't call yourself a "man-dime" again.

When she said "they're not even open yet", you should've immediately found a place that is open and see if she truly wanted to go to lunch with you.

For next time, don't text her until work and just chit chat, I wouldn't bring up hanging out for a week.

GordonGecko69 · 2022-07-07T15:38:26+00:00

Problem 1: you are texting someone while you are at work with them instead of talking to them. That’s your first b@&ch move.

Viktor2500 · 2022-07-07T17:08:44+00:00

Do nothing for a week or two. She may start flirting with you trying to get you to ask her out again

bcool_returns · 2022-07-07T17:09:04+00:00

So I work graveyards with a beautiful woman. I texted her and asked her to get breakfast with me today as we were leaving. The place in question didn't open until an hour after our shift. She said she would go, but she has lunch with a friend in a couple hours, and didn't want to spend an hour waiting for the place just to open.

Logistics are something every man needs to know how to handle. One key concept in that is learning how to differentiate between a condition and an objection. This sounds more like a condition and it is perfectly reasonable for someone to not want to wait around in limbo for an hour after a long work shift and when they have plans later in the day. So you need to be a problem solver. Surely there are at least a dozen other places you could have taken her right after work. An early morning food truck. A bodega. A coffee shop. A 24hr diner. A grocery store where you could grab something to go and sit in a park. A park. A beach. The rooftop of your apartment. But something. And as you decisively make your pitch, her compliance will reveal more clearly whether this was a condition like I suspect, or a true objection/rejection.

"Wow, I can't believe youre turning down breakfast with a man dime (face palm emoji) lol jk, have fun with your friend and have a good weekend!"

Not to be harsh but this is an incongruent, and childish mess. But you are making a common mistake I've been seeing a lot here recently, where guys don't realize how much wiggle room and opportunity they have in an interaction. But because you didn't do the simple thing 1 text ago, now you're going scorched Earth and getting in your feelings about what you (I'd say wrongly) perceive as a rejection.

She then replied with, "They're not even open yet!"

This is more evidence that this was a condition. But you don't get it. That's when you say "Tragic... Let's meet at x park instead then. We can grab something from that bomb food truck."

I didn't really know of anything else near by that was open at the time, so I just teased her some more and said, "Starting to doubt the work hard play hard life style you claim"

Now in just 3 texts, you've exited completely out of the idea of meeting this woman and are now teasing someone who is being cooperative with you. Not the move. Next time, solve problems and be a man with a plan.

Specialist_Cycle_342 · 2022-07-07T18:25:05+00:00

She seems to be playful right back so ask her out another time when she doesn’t have to wait an hour

MO_drps_knwldg · 2022-07-07T19:42:12+00:00

Sounds pretty much like common sense, place wasn’t open. Not everything is a test or a game. She just didn’t want to sit around waiting an hour. You did a shitty job planning.

Your texts reek of insecurity. You ‘tease’ her, then say just kidding lol, then close with an over enthusiastic statement with an exclamation point. Nice Guy 101 move. The ‘man dime’ line was cringe.

Just say, “Understood. Have fun with your friend.”

Sounds like she’s far more mature and upfront than you are.

Vinegar_Tits_9 · 2022-07-07T14:56:03+00:00

Ya blew it. Sorry. But honestly did you really think she was going to just wait around for an hour doing nothing? Then that cringe response 😬 Sounded like you we’re trying to pick a fight or egging her on (of course that’s just the tone I got from what you wrote, that’s the problem with txt, you can’t sense the tone)

Soft-Durian3245 · 2022-07-07T16:13:40+00:00

You were pushing too hard, stay cool, but yes the door is open to another try. Just be cooler…..not so intense

Peacebone000 · 2022-07-07T18:07:55+00:00

Its possible that you can ask her again because she didn't exactly say no. Just make sure your timing and plan is solid next time.

And I honestly would have suggested another time if she didn't or tease her and say she owes you one.

wwwhhhgggwq · 2022-07-07T17:48:40+00:00

Why are you hollering at a coworker?

modsRlameIRL · 2022-07-07T22:53:50+00:00

Teasing women via text is so cringe if you haven’t slept with her already imagine a male friend sent you that tease text because you said you didn’t want to wait an hour before going to breakfast… you’d be like wtf? N that’s probably how she responded to your weird attempt at a tease.

Just say what you want to say n stop being weird about it

Majestic_Meal_5655 · 2022-07-07T15:21:43+00:00

I've been advised and have found out for myself to never joke orc tease over text because it can get misunderstood. Humor don't translate that well over text. Only text to set stuff up, never just chat. Or get friendzoned.

Equivalent_Ad282 · 2022-07-07T20:29:39+00:00

You may of threw it dude. Keep things on edge next time and just say okay maybe another time!

The man dime.. She probably laughed out loud with cringe common dude you gotta know better.

NiNj4_C0W5L4Pr · 2022-07-07T21:02:51+00:00

Keep it light & playful. Don't invite her anywhere ever again and wait to see if she ever counter-offers. If she asks you to breakfast in the future, it's on. If she never brings it up you know exactly what her feelings are towards you. Keep the texts to one or two. You do not want to have a relationship over the phone. If it bothers her you don't text much it's because you have a life (if she wants to be a part of it she can then talk to you anytime she wants). Remember: you are the prize. Make her earn you. (But be playful, not a dick!)

ExpensiveNinja · 2022-07-08T00:53:19+00:00

"Man dime" 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

In all seriousness, you tried way too hard and she could smell it. Just be normal next time. If it feels cringey, it's probably cringey.

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