How do you be an asshole without being an asshole?

MeWuzBornIn1990 · 2022-05-03T18:24:55+00:00

Speak your mind and don’t be afraid to be your authentic self.

CompetitionFair7686 · 2022-05-03T20:17:56+00:00

I tend to get friendzoned because I'm nice.

False. It’s fine to be nice, the problem is that you are not behaving in a masculine way and you make things platonic with the girl by playing it too safe.

In other words you don’t flirt sexually with her and don’t even try to build sexual tension first, which leads to getting friendzone as soon as you start being sweet and available and acting like an ideal boyfriend.

in other words you skip the sexual tension phase, and jump straight into acting romantic with a girl that just isn’t feeling the spark with you, so when you reveal you want some for you get turned down because the vibe is platonic rather than sexual.

Being nice has nothing to do with it.

Like not just being a sweet, nice, always available guy - but someone attractive, confident, and desireable as more than just a friend

You build attraction by doing sexual flirting which is basically to create sexual tension with a girl by expressing verbally and non verbally your sexual desire for her.

nosepickergabe · 2022-05-04T00:25:59+00:00

If you get friendzoned don't be afraid to walk away. Have self respect, being that you don't always have to put other people's needs in front of yours. I have more to say but, I'm about to get a haircut.

Neo-Rio · 2022-05-04T01:33:02+00:00

You don't have to change who you are, but you do have to have discipline to defend yourself from emotional abuse as well. You have to know what you want, and what you will or will not accept.

Most niceguys don't understand their value and just give it away for free. Then get upset when the woman doesn't reciprocate.

What you have to do is force the woman to invest in you (by getting her to chase after you), and limit your interactions with her unless it's under the context that you want.

Learn to say no to women when they're offering you something you don't want.

Avoid friendships between men and women. The minute one of you start seeing someone else regularly on a sexual basis, that friendship is as good as dead anyway. You or her will spend more time with the sexual partner than the non-sexual friend. At that point it's "goodbye stranger"

DetainTheFranzia · 2022-05-04T00:29:56+00:00

Don’t give yourself up fully. Nice guys, like I tend to be sometimes, are people pleasers. We feel like we want to tell everyone the FULL story all the time. It leaves no mystery with you. There’s nothing to wonder about you, nothing to be desired. Stop giving her the full explanation for who you are. Give her short answers and let her ask questions about you. Keep her wanting more.

willgo-waggins · 2022-05-03T21:24:15+00:00

Don’t take anyones shit.

Have an opinion and have it be truthful and fact based. And don’t be afraid to admit if you are wrong but don’t lose confidence because of that.

Take the lead. The vast majority of women are followers even when they are adamant about their “independence”. They will generally automatically fall in line even as they play at resisting and countering you. It’s actually quite amusing to watch. My girl is a spot on perfect example. Miss independent all the time but when it’s time to go somewhere, do something or perform a task she immediately defers to me and takes direction.

Have fun with life. Joke. Make people laugh. Poke a little fun at things. Don’t be hurtful or cruel about something that she opens up about as a sensitive subject. You’re done then. Maybe she acts goofy and is a little embarrassed. Prod it along a little as a joke. Then when she naturally gets a little pushed back, laugh and clearly let her know you were just having fun with her and if possible create physical contact to bring her back in and create bond.

All this stuff but let it flow naturally not awkwardly.

mjornir · 2022-05-04T00:13:26+00:00

Enforce your boundaries rigidly. Say no to things that won’t make you happy or benefit you. Put yourself first and others after.

You won’t actually be an asshole by doing these things, but some people who think they’re entitled to your time and energy may label you as one.

Rikthelazy · 2022-05-04T02:45:13+00:00

Why do you guys always say nice, why not use the word respect, it makes everything easier to understand.

Ok-Professional2756 · 2022-05-04T09:44:34+00:00

You are confusing being a rug women wipe their feet on with being an ass.

You can be perfectly nice, respectful and polite and not be a rug for women to wipe their feet, you know.

Ambitious-Ice2357 · 2022-05-04T10:21:33+00:00

Stop caring what women think and be yourself.

NineteenAD9 · 2022-05-04T12:15:23+00:00

The most confident people are very social because they are comfortable with the judgment and results of anything they say or do, whether it's something positive or controversial.

If that makes them assholes, then it is what it is.

If you can accept those things, then you'll gain confidence. If you can't, then you'll typically find yourself people pleasing and only saying things that sound good to other people.

kiramdahanett · 2022-05-03T18:24:28+00:00

https://mikemehlman.net/2021/09/09/relationships-as-a-polygamous-male/

read this article , all U need.

Smokeythemagickamodo · 2022-05-04T05:15:01+00:00

Speak your mind be direct. Don’t insult or neg. I almost bagged a chick with a bf but had to respect boundaries today. Quote, “you are wild.” Why yes I am.

atomant88 · 2022-05-04T07:15:40+00:00

Dont be an asshole

2022-05-04T09:02:13+00:00

I speak fluent asshole without even trying.

jao_vitu_bunitu · 2022-05-05T04:28:10+00:00

You get friendzoned because the girl is not interested most likely, no girl that likes you will friendzone you. You don't need to be an asshole either.actually that's pretty bad. you have to be yourself and understand nuances. If people are not interested in the things you like to talk about or the things you like in general, move on to a different person. Sometimes men tend to force sympathy and act in an artificial way and they end up being a creep or a weirdo or too submissive. You need to be assertive, always being nice ofc. Being nice is not treating a woman like a a superior thing wanting a reward from her, it is treating her with respect and being educated and proactive.

Title	How do you be an asshole without being an asshole?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	12
Comments	37
Date	May 3, 2022 6:19 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/uhmcbs/how_do_you_be_an_asshole_without_being_an_asshole/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-you-be-an-asshole-without-being-an-asshole.1260553 https://theredarchive.com/post/1260553

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