Rejection making me suicidal. [recovered]

1keentolearn12 · 2022-04-08T13:08:28+00:00

Stop linking your self worth to a women

victorhugogime · 2022-04-08T14:04:27+00:00

Most people will actually say for you to either

Quit dating and improve your life,

Get better at game,

Therapy (this is valid, i am fine now (not really) and still go),

My advice would be, strangely enough, to kind of give up, but its more than that,

First would be to find the absolutely hottest girl, and DON'T hit on her, just friendzone yourself,

Now you will get intimate and try to learn about her life, you will find out, i bet, however ridiculously stupid they are, she has problems, very likely too, you will realize she is deep down miserable,

This will be good for you, because you will understand everyone as misery, doesn't matter how hot they are, how happy they look, vast majority nowadays are miserable,

Then you will realize your situation is completely normal, you aren't especially suffering, the problem is clearly not you, at this moment you will give up

Giving up is wonderful, because if everything is shit, and barely anything can be done to change it, you will realize nothing matters very much,

If nothing matters very much, her rejection won't either, sure if she accepts you it's nice, if she doesn't you will feel bad, but it doesn't matter much, neither why she rejected you btw, her opinion is as irrelevant as she is,

Thus you are then free, to do whatever the fuck you want, say whatever the fuck you want, if you find a girl hot, just go and flirt with her, the outcome is irrelevant, sure trying to say the right things is valid, but in the end, it might mean that if you get rejected, she didn't find you hot, but again if she isn't going to fuck with you tonight she is more likely than not, uber irrelevant in your life,

Thus you are free, you might have lost all hope and dreams, but you attain something much more valuable, you are free, and powerful,

The moment you don't care anymore, nothing can really hurt you anymore, you are capable of doing so much more because you don't care, that it becomes a superpower, women would start wondering, wtf he has that he is so confident, this ugly mofo came without any insecurity and hit on me, when i tried to scold him he just walked away?

Why he thinks himself so special?, you become to walk above social norms, by riding above it you make yourself almost a criminal, women love criminals because they have this power btw,

They are capable of things law abiding common men can't that is why even chads lose to thugs sometimes, because he is capable of walking the extra mile,

And in the end, your only goal becomes getting your dick wet or your back hugged, the shame will disappear because you don't care about it anymore,

THIS IS NOT EASY, HUMANS ARE HARDWIRED TO CARE, BUT THE MORE YOU BREAK THIS CIRCUITRY, THE MORE YOU BECOME SUPER HUMAN,

Believe me, i really grew much more confident, capable, my social circle grew, my possible woman that, i can have a chance with grew, because now the excuses are gone, i'm starting to get a rep in campus even, but i don't care,

People don't matter, morals don't, opinions don't, outcomes don't, the girl doesn't, and you, ultimately doesn't either,

At this point you are a vessel to realize your deepest desires, your body suffering, other people suffering is irrelevant, all that matters is the goal you desire happening,

So quit caring, just do whatever the fuck you want, and if people judge you, just laugh at them, for they are weak and afraid, and you no longer are,

This will lead to suffering, a lot of setbacks, judgement, people treating you like a villain or something, but it will likely happen anyway, and if you remember,

If they aren't helping you they are irrelevant, ignore them as you ignore ants in the sidewalk,

I typed too much already, now i will wait for replies...

xDuelx · 2022-04-08T15:28:16+00:00

Man I feel ya. I had the best date of my life a year ago and ended up getting ghosted for no reason. I think it's just bc women have so many options. I don't really know what to tell you though. I wish I had some advice.

Shakur2c · 2022-04-08T12:56:03+00:00

Its kinda desperate to plan a date while on a date. Should just hang out, have fun and hook up. If she ghosted you that means she wasnt into you, or she saw the red flags. The red flag being your serious lack of self esteem. No one wants to date someone who wants to kill themselves. Look inward and figure out whats going on in your head. You're only 19. I felt that way at 19. They say it gets better and it actually does.. good luck

Delicious_Ad_1853 · 2022-04-08T15:27:51+00:00

Everything you're describing is all a pretty normal part of dating... except the suicidal thoughts.

Please reach out to someone you trust about that. That is NOT a battle you want to fight alone.

We can help you with the rest of it when you're ready to venture back into the dating pool.

Robofrogg1 · 2022-04-08T16:08:00+00:00

Comparison is the thief of joy. There is always someone better off and worse off than you. Self worth comes from within. Know your value and don’t let others tell you what it is. But this is all most likely not going to help until you really, really, get it. And to do that, you need therapy.

Chief-Blackberry · 2022-04-08T17:32:32+00:00

That sucks man. The only thing I know with absolute certainty is, you will have a tough time finding someone else to make you happy, if you arent first happy with yourself. Kind of cliche, but an accurate statement.

I’m the oldest of a few siblings, I never had issues getting women, nor did my younger brother, but my youngest brother did. He would constantly ask “what do I say, what do I do here”…heck, I would even respond for him in texts, he would use them, and even got a few dates, but nothing LT. He seemed massively depressed for a few years and talked like you did and even said he was generally accepting the fact he would be alone forever. I introduced him to some new hobbies, he jumped in them completely, and by 25-26 he seemed a lot more happy and busy. As soon as he started focusing on his hobbies, I noticed him changing a bit, and Christmas that year (he was prob 26-27), it seemed like a different guy. We went out a few times together, I would try to offer him some tips and he would basically say he didn’t need them. He probably dated 3-4 women seriously over the next couple years, ended up getting married and has kids now. You would never know a decade before he was depressed or somewhat suicidal.

Not sure what the change was…maybe it was keeping himself busy, maybe it was accepting his “fate”, maybe it was maturing a bit…no clue. All I know is the guy who couldn’t get women and was distraught by it, now is the exact opposite, and is living a happy and fulfilling life. I don’t doubt things will probably turn out the same for you in the long run, or others in your similar position. Good luck

Low_Fondant9911 · 2022-04-08T18:07:59+00:00

Bro, women are bullshit and stop being so existential at 19. You don't know your ass from a hole in the ground. Just chill out and maybe lower your standards if getting pussy is such a big deal

norwegiandoggo · 2022-04-08T14:39:17+00:00

Everytime I get rejected by a girl I start questioning my self worth

Well don't. Why would you tie your self worth into a rejection? The guys who get laid the most also get rejected the most. Getting rejected should give you a sense of pride. That you have the balls to hit on women when most men don't.

I've been rejected probably 1000 times. Am I feeling horrible about my self worth? No. Because rejection is not a reason for me to question my self worth. I don't take it personally.

Rejection is feedback + part of learning dating life + I know not everyone can be attracted to the type of guy I am so it's partially just a numbers game. Some of it is within my control and some isn't. That's it. The more you risk rejection the more you will learn and the more successful you will eventually be. But even the most amazing players out there who can get women left and right, still get rejected a bunch. So you might as well get used to it and learn to deal with it in a healthy way.

MO_drps_knwldg · 2022-04-08T16:34:19+00:00

Stop thinking in terms that rejection is something that only happens to you.

It has happened frequently for me, the people who post here, and anyone else on earth.

Start thinking in abundance. You’re 19, there are so many other girls out there that will make you forget about her. Have fun dating and hooking up with girls. Don’t place your romantic hopes on someone you just went out with a few times.

I posted on this idea yesterday.

FlatDistance5 · 2022-04-08T17:11:27+00:00

Fucking soft-ass gen zxywabc generation….. dude your fookin 19, 19!!!!! Change your thought pattern. Think of like this how many 19yo in this generation, assuming they aren’t a basketball player or football player at your school are getting this far with women. You guys (gen z) have a record high virginity rate, why because you guys don’t act like men, you don’t look like men, and you take small things like a rejections like it’s something that is critical to whether you live or die. Bro if you don’t realize it now women are very fickle especially to normal guys. They’ll change their mind just because the wind changed directions. It’ll make you want to kill yourself multiple times over with the sheer amount of rejection you’re facing in this dating market.

Dude women are only loyal one thing….. their emotions. Once you accept this taking rejection and increase in experiences as a dater becomes way easier.

Now will you still face rejection, yes waaaaaayyyyyyy waaaaaayyy more rejection. I’ve slept with 40 women in 8 years I’ve been close to sleeping with over 100, been on multiple dates with 100, been rejected by all of them at one point including the 1000+ approaches to get me those women and 100+ dates. Only thing you can do is control what you can control going to the gym, meditating MEDITATING MEDITATING LIKE CRAZY ok only 10 mins a day, dressing well. And putting yourself out there.

This is what I say college is practicing just cold approach a few times a week so you don’t get reputation. Become a social leader or group leader so woman and men can look up to you. And if you sleep with women in college then cool if not cool.

But once you leave, and let’s say you’ve been doing consistent cold approach in college, built your body up, leader of student council, now you have a great job and crazy social experiences stories and great place to stay dude as long as you not trying to fuck women at your job you’ll be prime beef in the real world.

College is all about experiences low expectations (except studying) and having fun, women are goofy build you up into the man women want to fuck learn social skills ignore women goofiness and let the chips fall where they may

Now give me ma damn dislikes

Separate_Taste3428 · 2022-04-08T15:14:51+00:00

Gain control of improving yourself before women got involved, take a break for a while and get back on track on becoming the best you.

putcoolusernamehere · 2022-04-08T18:16:48+00:00

(1) see a therapist or talk to a trusted friend/family member.

(2) in my personal experience, rejection started to hurt less when I got rejected more. If you go get rejected by 20 random women doing a cold approach next week, by the end of the week you’ll just shrug off rejection.

EelWithATopHat · 2022-04-08T20:02:47+00:00

I’ve been in a similar situation almost completely the same as what you just mentioned. I recommend you join a club where you will be able to interact with more people. The more people you are exposed to the more chances you have of hooking up. Also, go to the gym to get some dopamine and self esteem

RsGaveMeDiabetes · 2022-04-08T20:26:38+00:00

Unless you see yourself as a 6/10 7/10 first you really shouldn't focus on dating too much, get the confidence first the self esteem & put in the work on yourself and the rest will follow.

kathruins · 2022-04-08T20:53:47+00:00

you are focusing on the wrong things. you got the farthest you've ever gotten!!! you're here to keep upping your game and improving your self worth, so it only gets better from here. soon you'll make it a little further and then even further than that. keep learning from your mistakes and growing.

seeing how its so detrimental to you right now, definitely take a break and try to find self worth from within. work on a hobby or creative outlet. find joy in yourself--the chicks will come much easier and you wont care as much when they leave.

ksmith11011 · 2022-04-08T21:37:33+00:00

Try not confirming the date. Wait for her to do it

Mau_Fernandez · 2022-04-09T00:38:02+00:00

You're too young and you have a lot to live for! The more rejectings you have, more stronger you will be, don't give up, if one girl rejects you, another one will come soon or later... this is not the end of the world and your life.

I'm 41 and when i have your age i lived the same sh*t so i know what i'm talking about.

There's a lot of girls around but now you need to focus in yourself: do some exercises, practice some hobby, meditate (mindfullness), do the things that really makes you happy and most important: don't chase girls for a while, you'll be more attractive to women if you don't pay attention to them.

sienfiekdsa · 2022-04-09T04:12:53+00:00

You are 19, you gotta chill out.

Everyone deals with rejection. Welcome to adulthood where you’re now available to face rejection from jobs you really want, programs you want to get into, friends you want to connect with, clubs you want to join, apartments you want to lease, and a whole lot more.

I met an attractive man at his house party my best friend took me too. He has a penthouse, with floor to ceiling windows on the top floor of the fanciest building in our city. He is a CEO of a company he started, is wealthy, extremely attractive, good hair good skin, good smile and a huge package. Because everyone has heard about it 🙄 He asked my friend (she is model pretty) to stay the night after. she kissed him and they spent an hour talking getting to know each other after. She said no. I was like why?! “Because I don’t wanna sleep with this man I just met. And after getting to know him we just aren’t a match.” He’s a cool guy but it’s not for everyone and that’s ok.

I’m mentioning it to say even the guys who seem to have everything get rejected. It is not the end of the world for everyone not to love you immediately. Everyone will not love you. Or even like you. No one owes you love or sex. What matters is that you like you and the other people who do too. So stop comparing yourself to what you think you should be experiencing because you think other men are and go your own journey.

Title	Rejection making me suicidal. [recovered]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	21
Comments	43
Date	April 8, 2022 12:52 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/tz2ure/rejection_making_me_suicidal/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/rejection-making-me-suicidal.1262622 https://theredarchive.com/post/1262622

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