I read enough theory to become a professor in it. Just about any book that tends to pop into your head, I've likely read it. I've done a few approaches, all cold approach. Some got to the number, but all were flakes. I mostly had nervous energy because I was reading theory and put aside my purpose at the time. I was just focusing on approaching and lifting, and my confidence was there but I was overthinking to the point of anxiety. I would go to the mall JUST to learn how to approach, thinking it would allow me to "learn how to approach without being anxious". I was treating it as a challenge.

Unfortunately, I realise now that going to a mall to do cold approach to me was literally the opposite of abundance mentality. I was giving so much of a fuck that I became crippled when it came to approaching. And honestly, I think that if I continued going to malls to try this shit out, that mentality would remain no matter what bs mindset I read online to "reframe" the situation. Doing cold approach rather than warm approach felt super uncalibrated in a social sense, since there was little context to bounce off of, outside of your frame of pretending it's normal. Yeah, you can comment about a chick's shirt, or the mall, or the fact that you both like "starbucks", but if you internally know that you're doing this shit JUST to approach chicks, it fucks with your head. If it's your job like those PUAs online, their mentality going into it is different than some random. They're doing it FOR their purpose. It's not the same thing. It's like those prank videos. When you're being filmed or doing it for work, you will grind through it. If you want to cold approach a chick in the mall and make out with her for that ego boost though, more power to you. I saw this shit where the chick didn't even speak english and the dude is straight up saying some bs then grabs her neck and makes out with her. I mean do you.. But to me, it's like if I was on the bus, on the way to work and you had my purpose in mind, cold approach in that situation makes more sense. You see a cute chick on the bus to work and say what's up. You have less abundance. On your mind is your purpose. The approach is just a side thing. It's more natural.

Actually doing cold approach for the sake of cold approach and "getting over approaching" made me realise how fucking strange it is. It feels autistic. Even if I manage to "get over it" one day, it would still come back the next day. No particular inner change. Others might disagree, but for me personally, from my limited experience, I believe that unless you're at a certain looks threshold, it'll usually come off as scummy to approach, unless your charisma is inborn, or you go DEEP into the numbers game. This could change in the future, but that's what my experience has lead me to for now.

What did I do after that? I let go of theory and started focusing on my purpose. I'm focusing on classes, hitting the gym 3 times a week consistently with a well-maintained diet, and on my hobby. There's literally barely any time for anything else. I have to fit in friends into MY schedule, rather than just hanging out to hang out. It's WAY easier to make friends now because I stopped giving a fuck, and I'm seeing more IOIs. I'm also feeling fucking good pretty regularly, and I'm not being down on myself for personality traits that I'm still working on. I'm just fucking existing. Sure, the girl situation didn't magically sort itself out, but now I feel better equipped to go for it and have fun with it without care for the outcome. I'm not intimidated by chicks. I knew we were all human before, but now it's different because I KNOW inside that I don't need chicks for my purpose. So subconsciously, I see them as a matter of "yo, this is me, come with or peace out". If I had to put aside some of my current purpose to chase chicks, I genuinely feel like this would put a dent on my confidence that I currently have been gaining. It's weird to explain, but it's literally some shit that I FEEL. When I walk in a hallway, I'm not overthinking eye contact. I'm walking confidently and think "what will I do NEXT to accomplish my goals?", not "did I break eye contact, did I look beta?". Shit like that.

TL;DR I read a shit ton of theory and did a few approaches just for the sake of getting better at approaching. It didn't help me because I still had that shitty overthinking mentality and no abundance. Now that I said fuck it and I'm focused on my purpose, I feel better equipped to cold approach WITHIN the context of what I'm doing (ex. on the bus, on my somewhere, in class, at work etc.). From my own experience at least, I feel like approaching in the mall just to approach, regardless of techniques, will lead to an unhealthy inner mindset and can fuck you up.