Is this a good convo starter?

Intelligent_Text_791 · 2025-11-09T05:49:37+00:00

"Sorry to bother you"

Alarmed_Box1198 · 2025-11-09T08:58:48+00:00

If your go to is an apology in your opening line, you need to reset your entire perspective. I know this seems minor but it's not.

FreeNicky95 · 2025-11-09T06:08:20+00:00

Nah. Keep it simple. Just say something funny relative to where you’re at. It’s rlly not what you say but how you say it and how your body language is.

InFoolSpate · 2025-11-09T06:20:22+00:00

No. Less "nice guy" shit.

OpinionThink481 · 2025-11-09T14:11:45+00:00

Remove the "sorry to bother you" because you are not supposed to apologize for going for what you want or doing or saying anything you wanted to say... 99% of the time you should never apologize for absolutely anything to a woman.

And you are making assumptions about bothering her which only shows your insecurity which is unattractive. If anything you can instead say "i know this is random".

Remove also the "i'm sure a lot of men come up to you to tell you this" because if you already know that a lot of men say it then you shouldn't be another one who says the exact same thing like a robot, be original and say something different.

And if you can't come up with something different, then don't remind her that you are just as unoriginal as all the others, and just say it without making any assumptions about what she must have heard from other men.

Add that you want to get to know her after saying you find her pretty. Don't just jump into the name, say why you are there, don't assume she should now why you are there just because you told her she is pretty.

So verbalize it by saying "and i thought i wanted to get to know you because i would regret it if i didn't try".

So the phrase would be something like:

"Hey, excuse, just one thing real quick, i know this is random, but the thing is i saw you and wanted to approach because i find you very pretty, and i thought i wanted to get to know you because i would regret it if i didn't try. What's your name?"

That's it. Zero apologies, zero assumptions about what she must have heard, and zero

Spirited-Challenge94 · 2025-11-09T06:02:44+00:00

Na man i am no expert, but that sounds too formal and not fun.

InvestigatorFull1364 · 2025-11-09T08:57:37+00:00

Lets dissect it.

Excuse me, sorry: these are ok to make her stop. Not afterwards. Also let her stop before rolling out the opener. Like completely stop and paying attention to you. Stopping and opening are too different things

Compliment part (you look nice): this is standard daygame opener. But… the value is not on the opener. It is more an acknowledgement of the seduction frame. You are in the clear, you can keep using this. Just stack afterwards

Everything else: unnecessary to damaging. You don’t need to acknowledge her attraction by others or the social situation (unless it is uncalibrated to not do so)

The opener is short because it is just that, the excuse to stop her. Standard pua theory has you that you should be stacking afterwards. That is a fun observation or an assumption story

BurnItDownSR · 2025-11-09T09:32:09+00:00

Funny how the same people who parrot "It doesn't matter what you say but how you say it" get overly critical about what this guy is saying to women just because it hits them in their insecurities.

Just test the opener yourself.

I never asked any group or forum for confirmation before testing something out. Most guys here only approach once every 3 months or never anyway, it's not like their guess is gonna be any better than your's.

If you need reassurance before testing something due to fear that you will get rejected or humiliated then all the more reason you should test it because you shouldn't be avoiding rejection and awkward situations.

You can't play to win unless you stop playing not to lose.

Go out there, take risks, open yourself up to rejection, test stuff, and learn the truth.

A1Horizon · 2025-11-09T10:21:07+00:00

sorry to bother you

Assuming you’re bothering her already puts you behind the 8 ball

I’m sure a lot of men come up to you and tell you this

Pedestalising

You’re very pretty

If plenty of men say it to her, and none of said men are around right now, why would you do better saying the same thing?

I’d say one, don’t start your approach by apologising, two reduce the formality, and three comment on something about her outfit or just the environment you’re in rather than calling her pretty

cemj86 · 2025-11-09T15:19:23+00:00

What are you sorry for? 😂 I'm not sorry to walk up to anyone.

It makes you seem like you're asking for permission to live in her space.

Then you shift your attention to other men completely disregarding the connection you want to make with her.

It screams "Validate me!"

Killing all the tension or any curiosity before it even starts Man.

Bro it's as simple as telling her that you were about to leave but you'd regret not saying hi or something along the lines that's NOT a script or pickup line. It's the truth, it's easy and on top of that you said hello. A lot of women will admire that even if she's not feeling it oh well, you did it without being sorry.

You've been you for however many years, you don't need permission to express it and introduce your presence.

At least you're curious and asking questions just don't get stuck here.

TemperatureNovel7668 · 2025-11-11T02:15:07+00:00

Don't start an approach with apologizing for your existence twice, it signals low value and she will get the ick. Don't praise her looks outright, it is kinda lame and she has heard it 9999 times before. Just "I saw you, and I just knew I had to approach you." isn't too bad.

AlastairXXL · 2025-11-09T15:24:40+00:00

Hey, I like you, wanna chat?

observer2121 · 2025-11-09T18:10:41+00:00

Why do you have to comment on her looks? It's so played out.Compliment something else. Even if you were to say "I just have to say great shoe paring, I just have to talk to any woman with style like this, what's your name?". It's complimentary, a little funny cause it's not something a guy would normally say and it kind of puts her at ease because it's not all about her physical appearance. It's also a much better conversation starter than how pretty she is.

fluxginshanks · 2025-11-09T18:25:09+00:00

Eye contact…. If it’s reciprocated even a simple “hi” is powerful

LonerOnSorensen · 2025-11-09T18:53:09+00:00

"You seem interesting so I came over here to say hi, what's your name?"

Prestigious_Water336 · 2025-11-09T07:23:01+00:00

I always comment about what she's looking at or doing. Maybe what she's wearing and then I introduce myself. I try to not comment about her looks. They've heard it so many times it means nothing to them. Make some more small talk then ask for her number or ask her what she's doing right now. If she's not doing anything ask her to get a drink or a meal at the nearest bar or restaurant.

ElBajitoGordito · 2025-11-09T10:50:34+00:00

Cold reads / specific compliments work great.

Trip_seize · 2025-11-09T11:29:18+00:00

Hey! I really love the way you <insert thing you love about the person here>.

ThatChromeCR · 2025-11-09T12:56:42+00:00

“hey, excuse me, sorry to bother you (playful laugh), i just thought you were really pretty.” *wait for response.

that’s my go to like 90% of the time.

Dandys3107 · 2025-11-09T13:40:35+00:00

Drop this casual tone, speak to her like you are already good friends, but obviously without being too direct at the start. Make some interesting or funny or positively shocking statement. It's all about emotions and sexual tension, you don't need to follow any social protocol or get any information from her, fixate your mindset on having fun and escalating intimacy gradually.

FateInHaze_Re-Pac · 2025-11-09T07:15:48+00:00

I like Johnny Soporno's opener: Hi I'm johnny what's your name? Just replace Johnny with whatever your name is.

Title	Is this a good convo starter?
Author	SuCCeSSvS
Upvotes	0
Comments	31
Date	November 9, 2025 5:46 AM UTC (9 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1osbfs8/is_this_a_good_convo_starter/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/is-this-a-good-convo-starter.1566065 https://theredarchive.com/post/1566065

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