stop TEXTING women

RunsFastAfterCoffee · 2020-11-23T06:50:14+00:00

Dear lord thank goodness there are others who feel the same. I only enjoy texting with people I already know. It's a terrible medium for communication between strangers. I use it mostly for logistics or very brief comments.

GrandMasterB19 · 2020-11-23T12:00:59+00:00

This is good advice but you don't have to lie to women about your stingy friend to justify why you're asking her out. Just own the fact that you're attracted to her. No explanation needed. If you approached her and she barely knows you, she knows why you're asking her out.

FlanneryODostoevsky · 2020-11-23T08:02:14+00:00

Morr advice that just works sometimes. Ive had plenty good convo with females thru text. Plenty flirting. Plenty long ass texts that made ME not feel like responding back. In general, id rather hang out in person, but shit, im bored in the house and in the house bored. So i text back when I get some time. Not keeping a convo going van be a bad sign too.

someonesomwhere27 · 2020-11-23T07:20:19+00:00

What do you do if you have gotten there number but not made intention clear but know they like you... in this circumstance the girl was actually working at my place and I caught her looking at me a few times but forgot to get her contact, she ended up friending me on facebook so I shot a message the next day and said "forgot to get you on facebook glad you found me though". No response all day... should I follow up and straight up ask her out, wait for a response or just send something else?

sabana_wanna · 2020-11-23T08:35:40+00:00

As a woman, I completely agree with this. It feels so strange and uncomfortable to be texting someone and trying to get to know them over texts. I’m also someone who hates texting so it makes it even more uncomfortable for me. I prefer to get to know someone through face to face conversation, which also gives me the opportunity to flirt with them and show other cues to let them know I’m interested in them.

Surprisingly though, I have a couple of female friends who mentioned that they need to do the texting phase first before they actually meet in person, because then it gives them some common topics to talk about on the actual date itself. I never understood this logic, but it’s not a unique opinion amongst some of my female friends.

AligatorTears · 2020-11-23T11:17:44+00:00

For women you don't already know I absolutely support this message.

I've had a few cases where bored text chats with somebody I'd already had a few dates with kept the game alive while we were both busy with other stuff, but the vast majority of cases it is a waste of time at best and an opportunity to mess up whatever you did have going at worst.

I have a friend who somehow owns it on text game though. He's not much to look at but he has found this niche for himself of girls who any normal guy would give up on because they never want to meet up in person or even face time. He'll just chat with these girls for a few months and then one day he just shows up with this smoking hot new girlfriend who he ends up dating for a few months before moving on. I've seen his technique and it is something I just don't have the patience for but this guy is punching above his weight on account of his quality text game.

CaptainHatGoose · 2020-11-24T04:26:29+00:00

I needed to hear this BAD. I literally was hitting up girls on social media i haven’t talked to in months and tried to build something up. Worked zero % of the time lol. Now it looks like I gotta forget about girls who I know/knew and go all in for girls I have yet to meet.

Thankfully there’s a girl at my favorite restaurant who I see a lot who’s pretty cute and last time I was there we had a nice little chat. I’ll make sure to chat her up more the next few times I see her and then give her my number

Therocksays2020 · 2020-11-23T05:11:07+00:00

(Nods head profusely)

I was looking at one of my most successful hook ups from hinge and we sent very few messages. We met up and I killed it.

I will say for those guys who get girls who say stuff like “I don’t want to rush into meeting” don’t let them use that as an excuse to be her text buddy.

Video calls and phone calls are totally appropriate alternatives to texting. That way you’re getting her full attention.

RunOrDieTrying · 2020-11-23T15:30:51+00:00

Some people (men / women) don't like phone calls. They prefer texting, and it's totally fine.

django329 · 2020-11-23T15:24:59+00:00

But bitches love smiley faces.

CanIstealYourDog · 2020-11-23T11:27:36+00:00

Just to be clear, when you say we should only text her that when we make it clear that we'd setting up a date, so when we ask for the number from someone, we tell them right then that we'd take them out on a date sometime and ask over text right? Or just get the number, after a short intro, and then text asking about a date first?

LakersAreTerrible25 · 2020-11-23T22:11:29+00:00

I dont care to talk to people over text in general. I use it for logistics and thats it

DorkyDwarf · 2020-11-24T04:38:14+00:00

How does the dinner message work if you use the wrong you're*?

Giu_bag · 2020-11-23T11:15:38+00:00

What do you mean when saying you shouldn't say "too much"?

Rare-Yam-3626 · 2020-11-23T13:31:51+00:00

I’m female and trying to get this boy that I like. Since quarantine (past 8 months) we’ve had no chance to see each other in person. I was stuck building a friendship online. I think I’ve mostly succeeded with that by now, but he’s still not enthusiastic to text me. And I wish calling was more acceptable but it seems weird and unnecessary with someone I hardly know. If he can’t allocate time to text me, how can he agree to a call?

Alex_O7 · 2020-11-23T16:05:52+00:00

This is real a poor suggestion. I mean this is good and perfect if both you and the girl your are/wanna be texting are socially awkward, introverts and boring people (which a lot of people are, even the ones that says the contrary). Sincerely I never found a problem in texting girls, of course like everything in the world you don't have to exaggerate this and you still have to know how to do it right.

Knowing someone else through message is NORMAL, it's nothing to stigmatize or to avoid. Using text only for logistics most of the time is creepy. If one of your friends text you only to plan your meetings would you consider him a good friend? Of course you would not send him dozens of messages and you wouldn't bombing him with notification... it's just easy like this.

Hate to continue reading bullshit like this from wannabe player...

dingleberry555555555 · 2020-11-23T16:38:32+00:00

How do you text only for logistics and not to build rapport? Always seems when I text for logistics without getting to know her first or getting her comfortable to meet it never works and they always ghost

quickjump · 2020-11-24T11:19:26+00:00

🖨

Connect_Operation · 2020-11-26T22:25:24+00:00

There is so much bad advice on this sub but every now and then I stumble on nuggets of gold like this one. Thank you sir.

relentless_pma · 2020-11-27T22:53:26+00:00

But what do you do in the days before the first date? Like I have planned a date with a girl I met onlin. the date will be friday. But the talking has stopped for now. But I cant keep it silent until friday so what should I do.

wondercat333 · 2020-11-24T15:47:41+00:00

This is good advice that I [24F] give to my friends. Sometimes a text conversation is REALLY nice, and I think that its good occasionally. However you dont want to use texting as a crutch to getting to know someone else. I asked for my current boyfriends number when we first met (we were 21 at the time) and honestly I had no idea why I was asking. Of course I wanted to get to know him and I was attracted to him, but I didnt say why and I wasnt even sure what I was ready for. I think tho cause I am a woman and in our society we expect men to make the move this worked in our favor cause me asking for his number gave him the confidence to initiate conversations and hanging out. I also reciprocated well because clearly I was into him since I gave him my number. He is an attractive guy, but didnt have much game because of his own insecurities (he only had one gf in hs and I was the first person hes been with, but when we met it was his first semester away at college) which is crazy to me because I personally think he is more conventionally attractive than me (although he is sweet and would disagree.)

This has gone super off track, but I think him and I work because there was and is this natural give and take flow. Neither of us felt like we were giving too much or taking too much and were “on top.”

Texting too much of the convos I think can have an unhealthy balance in the relationship. Honestly, the people closest in my life I never am texting because I am SEEING them or at least speaking to them on the phone. We only have drawn out texts when there is some hotgoss/tea (😂) or something really crazy happened.

Honestly my biggest advice is stop caring if you arent coming out on top. Dating isnt zero sum. If you are interested in someone let it be known once and if they reciprocate great! If they dont then keep it pushing the second that flow stops. Sometimes when you keep it pushing they will show interest (men and women do this) but honestly if you feel like dating is a competition between you and the other sex you will be left frustrated. That sounds frustrating.

Title	stop TEXTING women
Author	j2swole1
Upvotes	144
Comments	53
Date	November 23, 2020 4:44 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/jzb2ka/stop_texting_women/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/stop-texting-women.1506100 https://theredarchive.com/post/1506100

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