Trying to get back into dating, is cold approaching still relevant or is their a better way?

Rhino3750ss · 2025-02-20T00:51:41+00:00

Cold approach is now more effective than ever before.l, it's how you set yourself apart from her thousands of Internet options.

People among the younger crowd will throw around buzz words like "cringe" and "weird" in regards to approaching without internet involved. That is because most guys act weird when they attempt it.

Don't label it as "cold approach"; you are giving a regular greeting and having a regular convo with a human being. Go in without "try hard" energy and never sell yourself based on your self improvement victories, carry yourself as if you were born exactly how you are right now. Go in with 100% outcome independence, don't even flirt. Often when you talk without motive, the girl will flirt first or initiate physical touch because you appear preselected. Once you get a verbal or non verbal green light from her you can escalate and ask her out. The key is the hotter the girl; the more logic you remove from your speaking.

Red_Cat69 · 2025-02-20T02:17:12+00:00

Yeah, no, in the span of 3 years people have completely changed.

Now women self-destruct at the first 'hi'

LizzoBathwater · 2025-02-20T03:24:19+00:00

One thing to be aware is despite the success stories you may see, when you cold approach the likeliest reaction is “why the fuck are you talking to me” lol. Not verbally, but the vibe.

The onus is on you to lead the convo in a competent and interesting way for the first few minutes. Don’t expect the girl to be overjoyed you approached. I relearned this the hard way recently lol.

Western-Month-3877 · 2025-02-20T00:54:26+00:00

Better in what way? If you talk about bonding, I can tell you sleeping with someone from your circle feels better in quality (bonding-wise) than someone that you met from cold approach. This is coming from someone who finally stopped counting body counts from just using cold approaches.

You know stuff like fast food, fast fashion: Quicker for you, but quality is secondary. So if you don’t wanna spend months and years trying to court your female friend so she can eventually be your gf, then cold approach is your alternative. Instead of months or years, it’s just weeks, days, or even hours in some cases. But it’s mostly pure carnal. Unless you and her agree to still see each other.

DaygameCode · 2025-02-20T02:26:44+00:00

Cold approach is always a thing brcause it’s not a trend, it’s just a timeless way of meeting someone. It’s irrelevant if more or less people do it, because it’s not about what’s in or out. It’s about connecting with people in the way that works for you.

For some it’s cold approach, for others it’s dating apps, for others it’s social circle, for others it’s nightclubs, etc…

So whether it’s a good idea or not, it depends on each individual and their capacity to connect with someone doing that. For some it works for others it won’t, much like woth everything else.

For me it works, for others other things work.

CoachSlyDating · 2025-02-21T06:32:47+00:00

All of dating is a numbers game.

Cold approach is the best way to take control of your dating life. You choose how many approaches you do. You choose how to portray yourself, etc.

Social circle can keep you trapped unless you already know a lot of people. It’s not a reliable way to attract new prospects unless you are organizing events or the leader of a group.

Online Dating is a great supplement to your cold approach game. The two work in tandem because you will feel more abundant. But it is a crutch and you will not develop the confidence that cold approach requires. That will harm your in person dates with girls.

MineDesperate2920 · 2025-02-20T19:34:35+00:00

Online game is good if you aren’t already. And yes come approshc is still a thing.

Cold approach will always be a thing. It likely was a thing 5000 years ago. And will still be in a 1000 years

Chasin1337 · 2025-02-20T11:44:46+00:00

Everything is better than cold approach but doesnt mean its not succesful.

Depends how you do it, but personally i hate cold approach just because i imagine myself being a woman just trying to get groceries, while random men speak to you, would be very annoying/creepy to me.

Even in a bar i hate cold approach, because you are giving yourself worse odds. If you are somehow good looking/take care of yourself you can easily just look around in a bar/club and spot atleast some girls that are interested in you. Walk up to them and you dont waste time/effort. My succesrate went up just knowing how to spot signs a girl wants you to approach.

AAtmozfears · 2025-02-21T10:49:33+00:00

I'm based in Australia. Ironically I've found more success online even though I've done several cold approaches or day game but I'll admit likely not enough volume. Just did one today and was rejected but that's inevitable. At least with online you know they are single and looking to date, day game is numbers game.

liftingnstuff · 2025-02-20T18:55:50+00:00

Cold approach allows you to practice your social skills, flirting, escalation, problem solving, story telling etc at a higher volume than anything else. The skills you learn from practicing cold approach make you better at dating via dating apps, via meeting people through friends etc. Doesn't mean you shouldn't use dating apps or other ways of meeting people but practicing cold approach with intentionality is the most efficient way to improve.

Either_Tart_3834 · 2025-02-20T15:05:18+00:00

cold approach is probably more relevant today than it was in the past. point being, people used to know each other alot more. now they dont, so theyre forced to cold approach whereas before, communities were much tighter. theres also more mentally ill people today who are socially unaware. this means they are unable to build social circles, and therefore must cold approach.

are there better ways? of course, but if you need to even consider cold approach, then chances are, you probably have not been able to build social circles, and create relationships that wuold facilitate dating. other ways are not an option for you because cold approach is usually a last resort.

even if you were a loner, and maybe a semi likable guy, the people you come in contact with in your day to day life, public transport, cashiers, coworkers, shopping, someones going to invite you somewhere. this doesnt happen for most men who do cold approach because theyre usually not likable people. they dont get invited anywhere so they have no other choice but to cold approach

the best way has always been going through introductions. again, this relies on you being an upstanding member of the community, which is the opposite of guys who cold approach who usually have bad reputations. being an upstanding member of society means thinking before you act, and having a pattern of behavior that is deemed likable. men who cold approach dont care what people think about them, and thats partly why theyre unpopular. they do things that piss people off and before they know it, get shunned.

something else l noticed about guys who cold approach is that they usually surround themselves with other guys who get no dates. l dont know if they are conciously choosing other dateless men, or is it because normal men don't associate with them, so they have no other choice but to hang out with other dateless men.

something l noticed about people who are good with people is that they talk about alot of things that seem to be meaningless. like astrology. but for some reason this draws people closer to each other. on the opposite end of this, l notice that men who cold approach just say the wierdest things, like "how old are you", "whats your nationality", which are really not things you say when you pull up to random females on the street. the problem is that theyre unable relate to others, and thats why they ended up having to cold approach in the first place

Title	Trying to get back into dating, is cold approaching still relevant or is their a better way?
Author	FarFromThere2
Upvotes	22
Comments	30
Date	February 20, 2025 12:31 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1itldyt/trying_to_get_back_into_dating_is_cold/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/trying-to-get-back-into-dating-is-cold-approaching.1544366 https://theredarchive.com/post/1544366

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