Feminism lied to me. I am of that generation, the first that will work til retirement, just like a man, first that will be judged on her achievements , just like a man. What feminism says is that I am the same as a man. but I'm not. I'm a woman, and there isn't anything wrong with being a woman.

zarisin · 2010-12-14T00:26:22+00:00

You had me up until magical journey to the rainforest.

A-H · 2010-12-13T21:52:48+00:00

I was so loyal that I would have rebuked and dismissed anyone who spoke ill of my newfound soulmate.

This right here is why /r/mensrights gets all the kneejerk reactions it does.

Feminism should not be beyond criticism. It is not misogyny to criticize the flaws and hypocrisies of an ideology.

mdoddr · 2010-12-14T00:28:19+00:00

This sounds like it could be the basis for Eat, Prey, Love 2

zyk0s · 2010-12-13T22:58:07+00:00

Doesn't sound like this woman has learned anything. Sounded like a whole bunch of BS.

rantgrrl · 2010-12-13T23:04:01+00:00

You know what this piece is missing? Any mention of how the author's husband felt about the miscarriage.

She loves him but apparently his emotions are a complete void to her.

zyk0s · 2010-12-13T23:40:29+00:00

Interesting stuff. But I have to say, I think that we can have a passion for equality and fairness without having to call ourselves feminists. That always seems to confuse feminists...you say that you are not a feminist but you of course think that men and women are equal, and they tell you that you're a feminist and just don't know it yet. I guess what I'm saying is that the feminist movement doesn't have a monopoly on belief in equality between the sexes.

I have to agree with her assertion that feminism lied to her, though! I think that's definitely true. We can't have it all at the same time; we have to pick and choose. And many, many women find themselves more satisfied with their families than with their careers and their "independence". Yet feminism tells us that we CAN have it all, tells us that we can do whatever we want - well, unless we want to be mothers and homemakers, in which case it tells us that we'll be deeply depressed pill-popping closet alcoholics - and tells us that having a career will make our lives more full and enjoyable than "just" being mothers.

carlottavaldez · 2010-12-14T02:40:16+00:00

This is probably one of the most corny, poorly written things I've ever read.

Il128 · 2010-12-14T07:05:31+00:00

Yup. That career thing isn't all it's cranked up to be. For most people it's basically work work work work die.

dehemke · 2010-12-13T23:06:16+00:00

Maybe the next generation of women will understand that we don't have unlimited reproductive choices that last forever. Maybe they will stay grounded in feminine energies and wisdom as they live their lives and do their work in the world.

My feelings toward feminism have softened, and I see how I made her into the villain. I see that while feminism didn't really understand me, I didn't really understand her either. We were both young and spunky, ready to take on anything. Now we're ready to become good friends again.

the bitch is crazy.

Zombie_Killer_Jen · 2010-12-14T06:12:17+00:00

She waited too long to have a baby. How is feminism to blame for that? Everyone has to make choices. She didn't plan well.

Pretending that men and women are the same is not realistic, and the biological clock is one example. But wanting fairness and equality are still good things. A woman can be a feminist without being irrational.

Wordfan · 2010-12-14T07:26:25+00:00

So she pursued a career and then, at 36, met the love of her life and started trying to get pregnant right away, but she was too old. And now she regrets it, which apparently means she wishes she had settled for someone other than her great love so that she could get knocked up and step away from her career. She can dress it up all she wants, but what she's really saying is, "Fuck everything, I want a baby!" And she acts like that's somehow special.

machineloop · 2010-12-14T05:18:45+00:00

The title here is extremely misleading and most likely is worded this way to get all the nods of approval from feminist haters. If you end up reading the whole article, the author regrets the choices she's made because of the choices she has in life due to the social advances of feminism, not because of feminism.

ex_ample · 2010-12-14T01:37:43+00:00

"Wah wah wah, it turns out I don't like working." Whatever.

2010-12-14T06:03:18+00:00

This lady. Still shrill after all that life-learnin'. At least the generation of ladies after her learned how to laugh and relax.

ShakeyBobWillis · 2010-12-14T06:56:28+00:00

I love how everyones a fucking expert on what Feminism is as if you could sum it all up with one ideological mission statement. It's like summing up religion without acknowledging that there's a vast spectrum of ideas that fall under the umbrella of that term.

s0nicfreak · 2010-12-14T15:45:55+00:00

Maybe the next generation of women will understand that we don't have unlimited reproductive choices that last forever.

I'm pretty sure most of this generation and many generations before us already know this. I'd say adopt, but she's such an idiot that she probably shouldn't have a kid at all.

croqueenbouche · 2010-12-14T07:06:48+00:00

men and women are different. it is not fair to have to compete at things that men tend to be naturally better at and enjoy. i have struggled my whole life doing this, ignoring my natural inclinations, even to the point of feeling guilty about having them. equality should be more about valuing mens' and womens' work equally.

chrismorin · 2010-12-14T07:29:34+00:00

I think this is a little silly, she blames the choices she made on the freedom feminism gave her. Why would she think she could "have it all"; men also have to choose between family and career

2010-12-14T11:35:26+00:00

Not sure what this article is trying to get at, or why this is posted to MR. Obviously the woman is having some real issues after having to deal with an extremely tragic event in her life. She is tying feminism to her miscarriage - and while yeah, waiting longer to have a kid will lead to having more miscarriages, this is a pretty big stretch IMO. I wouldn't really pay much head to what anyone says in this state of mind.

2010-12-14T14:37:37+00:00

did anyone else find that article quite insulting to (a womans) understanding of real life? seriously. Oh yeah, and the "trip to the rain forest" is quite hilarious.

2010-12-14T18:59:06+00:00

Maybe the writer of this article confused "work" with "happy fun playtime that slows the aging process and allows you unlimited reproductive powers" and had an unrealistic expectation. Why it took her 40-some years to realize, I do not know.

pandemic1444 · 2010-12-14T05:57:28+00:00

When will people learn that in order to be equal you can't keep trying to set yourselves apart. Feminists don't want equality any more than the Black Panthers did but they pretend to.

rantgrrl · 2010-12-13T21:30:44+00:00

I posted this comment from the article cause it sums up what many women today seem to be realizing. Feminism is about envy and self-hate and control. Unfortunately it's taken many years and will take many more before enough people realize this truth. It's cost countless men, women and children their happiness and the freedom to be themselves.

The martyrs to the downfall of this hateful creed are the men who lost their freedom and children to false accusations and biased laws; to hateful innuendo and to outright lies at a personal and societal level.

A moment of remembrance is due to them this Christmas season, and to their children.

May the next generation have the strength of character to resist hate groups like feminism in whatever guise they next appear.

mpb92 · 2010-12-14T00:28:46+00:00

the first generation of women to be judged on her achievements.

If a women is good to her family, then she's a success; otherwise she's a failure. Who cares what you earn? You sold your heritage for a handful of dust.

wondergay · 2010-12-14T01:39:35+00:00

Work till retirement? The women I work with cut out 10-20 years early.

2010-12-14T07:20:18+00:00

It's not too late for you to make me a sammich.

arabis · 2010-12-13T23:43:52+00:00

Feminism doesn't suggest that men and women are identical; it suggests that they are EQUAL. Don't judge the entire ideology based on the behavior of a few extremists.

2010-12-14T07:16:51+00:00

Relevant clip from the West Wing: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lpcBWA1K9Xw

Edit: Oops, wrong clip. This is the one I was after: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NXPLirJRGDQ&feature=related

2010-12-14T12:40:10+00:00

People lied, feminisn just had lofty goals.

AaronCompNetSys · 2010-12-14T15:10:46+00:00

This topic and viewpoint hits home with how sad I feel for some of my friends. Well said.

ghostchamber · 2010-12-14T16:31:29+00:00

You're not the same, you just deserve the same options.

lolkiteez · 2010-12-14T18:35:11+00:00

neofeminism is a different concept. what you are referring to is the old school of thought. women should have the RESOURCES and ABILITY to do whatever they like, regardless of if it is to have a child young or pursue a career. daycare centers, equal pay, abortion, etc. those are the options neofeminism asks for.

the definition of feminism is "the advocating of womens rights." doesnt seem so bad to me.

2010-12-15T08:36:52+00:00

Not really sure what this has to do with men's rights. I actually think it would be more appropriate in r/feminism or whatever. It is a cautionary tale to women, and a true one if a little too colored by mystical euphemisms. Women need to be aware of their own biology and plan accordingly. Not really a men's rights issue.

2010-12-14T07:31:14+00:00

Ahhh. Feminism. Destroyer of chivalry.

Irradiance · 2010-12-14T12:57:33+00:00

I honestly don't know what's so bad about the traditional female role. Taking myself on an imaginative reverie, thinking about how it would feel....

... and it feels great! What a wonderful feeling of relief! Imagine, being financially supported while you get to engage in really meaningful stuff.

Raising a family, keeping a household's affairs in order, and the other traditional roles of females sound a whole lot more satisfying than slaving away in an office, an abstract cog in a company that you're bound to in order to fulfil your manly duty.

I can understand why women who are unable to carry out their traditional role due to being lesbians, prohibitively ugly, etc. would find limitations imposed upon the ambitions of women to be oppressive.

So, I can't really see why women can't simply accept being given equal opportunity in a meritocratic fashion to pursue whatever they please without having to debase the traditional woman's role, and especially without seeking to punish men for their millennia of supposed oppression.

stringerbell · 2010-12-14T00:13:35+00:00

'I am of that generation, the first that will work til retirement, just like a man, first that will be judged on her achievenements, just like a man...'

How naive! If women were really equal. If they really worked as hard.... Well, they wouldn't live 20% longer than men! And, that's just for starters...

kragshot · 2010-12-13T21:37:50+00:00

self-loathing r/mensrights chick-hating scumbag posts bias-confirming article written by self-loathing chick-hating scumbag. film at 11.

2010-12-14T18:04:42+00:00

But when we take a maternity leave, it is because of feminism's hard work that we have that opportunity.

And do men have paternity leave? The author skips over this fact b/c shes still a brainwashed feminist when it comes down to it. And this is exactly why MRAs exist.

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