Family court horror stories

she_shis_shim · 2023-11-18T12:10:28+00:00

My son was taken from his lifetime home at 13 years old, he had the same home, same doctor, school district, family pets, even his best friend since age 3 lived 3 doors down, simply because the judge decided at the last moment that she wanted to punish me for something, completely frivolous and not nearly worth the punishment she gave, which also has punished our son as well, however I never even did what she said she was doing it for anyway. He now lives 3 hours away one way and his father does things like send the clothes our son and I purchased together that he said he wanted to wear at his new school back to my place with him, telling him he had to leave those clothes at my place. All the things I used to practically beg my ex to be able to do while our son lived with me, like sports and plays, only to be denied voting the parenting plan, are now down as much as my ex likes and without a single word to me about it. I have been kept out of the loop about doctor appointments, school conferences, the world, just like I told everyone I would be if they took our son from the home he lived in since birth. My ex knows I have no money to afford any attorney that will even do anything to fix this and he knows I have no time because I am trying to work as much as possible to pay off the debt incurred from the 3 year custody battle that I shouldn't have lost at all. I am devastated. Utterly, entirely devastated. I cannot believe my ex would do this after I never kept him from his son, save for a couple weeks during the pandemic because he worked in an ER and the governor had called a brief lock down. I kept contact otherwise liberal during that time and there was no parenting plan in place when that happened anyway, but the moment the ban was lifted, our son went to see his dad. My ex is literally doing all he can to remove any trace of me from our son's life and the only reason he has him now is because of a judge that overstepped her power entirely and I can't fight it because I am broke but make too much to qualify for moderate means. I used to think that things like this were nightmare stories on the lifetime network. I used to think there was no way anyone could have their rights just taken from them that way by a court of law. I was so wrong and now I have no joy in my days at all. I love seeing him for the scant visits that my ex doesn't make up some reason to postpone, but then I remember he has to leave at the end and I just cannot even fathom that this is my life now. He once told our son he was being brainwashed by me because he had said he was going to take me to court and use it to bury me and ruin my life (he was angry at him about some trivial things he had done, he was 9 at the time) and my son had tearfully asked him not to take him away from his home because he loved me and he loved his home where his life is. I found out about that from a sibling who watched the whole thing pan out. How is it possible that he was able to get the GAL to lie for him, the lawyer to lie for him and the judge to even do it, too. I think even my pro bono barely out of law school lawyer may have gotten taken by my ex's side to just let me lose. The gal didn't even call any of my references to get any good points about me or do a meeting to see how our son and I got along but she did no background check on my ex, didn't even call his other mother's of his other children. The gal literally lied about me and my eldest son on the stand. I used to think all I had to do was be honest and the truth would tell the story. It didn't. I hate my life now. I have no idea what I am going to do or if it would even do anything. Sorry this is so long. I am bereft. I am so sorry to anyone else in this boat and I hope that my offer of hugs from a long ways away and an ear of you need to vent are taken with the kindness in mind that I am sending them. This is the most painful thing I have ever experienced in my life and I cannot just give up. I need to get him back home. I need a f00king miracle.

Super-Towel7854 · 2022-09-25T06:23:37+00:00

Stay Alive brother. It is hell. I miss my kids all I wanted to do was be a good father but I have to move on to survive.

When my kids were almost 4 and 2 years old I lost custody of them with no due process and under false pretenses. My kids were then neglected, abused, and alienated from me. At every hearing I was either ignored or lambasted by the Judge. A few years later my kids tell the police and social workers they have been beat senseless and neglected by their mother and other members of the household. The state takes custody, the state doesn’t allow me visits, my kids have trauma bonded with their mother, the state initiates the reunification process with their mother.

My son was held hostage in a police raid when he was two. It was during his mother’s parenting time and at her girlfriend’s domicile and it was that woman’s boyfriend who held him hostage. Both of those people had multiple meth possession convictions. The judge denied the approval of un-redacted court documents and police reports, one police interaction report was when witnesses saw their mom be violent with me while I was holding my daughter. Last year he asked me “If I was over her”. He also said it would be “inappropriate to talk to me at a hearing a few days ago.” He kept referring to the their stepdad’s parents as their paternal grandparents, their stepdad is accused of assaulting other children in the home.

No one who can do anything about it has ever cared. My kids are going through hell. I am fully capable of providing for them my fiancé and I will take care of them. I have a farm that I wish to pass on to them one day. This is unbelievable. “I’m not part of the plan.” Says the social worker, and I don’t even get phone call visits.

My kids have gone through hell. I’ve tried everything else. Journalists have passed the buck on this story one even laughed. All I can do is pray and get this story out there.

It has got worse, that was from about 6 months ago. I copied and pasted that from another post from another time when I was trying to explain my story.

How I lost them in the first was also a huge disgrace to not only justice but life its self.

New_Reputation_4623 · 2022-06-11T19:57:49+00:00

In family law is it best to hire a fiction writer to work with your lawyer? “Building a case” is just about making stuff up. *A story is even better if it fits with a cultural narrative of the day (pick any one). Appalling that it is like this. A form of law that seems predicated, most times, on third-rate lawyers eager to make hay.

Alright_So · 2022-04-28T19:06:28+00:00

Any facts to share or just gripes?

AcademicRelief6687 · 2022-04-28T15:40:55+00:00

The court is bias against breadwinner. I got shaft bad for making twice than my STBX who is not a SAH parent. I can't switch career to be a teacher for example so I can spend more time with my kid bc they will impute my income. I have no choice really. Meanwhile STBX can enjoy earning less and getting subsidy from me. I wonder if the law can ever be changed.

traveller1976 · 2022-04-28T05:48:37+00:00

Really sorry for the injustice against you, but really not a surprise. The only way to prevent such horrors in the future is for men not to play the biased games. All you single or divorced men who are thinking of marrying or impregnating, just don't. If a woman wants to prove herself she'll have to beg like a dog for your commitment.

Eve-3 · 2022-04-28T05:44:16+00:00

How is this system still in place? I do believe they broke me. I may need to change careers and fight for change. This cannot continue.

If there is any seriousness in that, please do! So desperately needed. I'm sorry you went through hell. It would be great knowing there's one more voice trying to stop it from happening to anyone else.

bacon-wrapped-steak · 2022-04-28T04:01:11+00:00

I got fucked in the ass. Ex lied. Got kids 100% without even having any hearings. Court system is absolute bullshit. I have zero respect for it whatsoever.

Also, attorneys are the most useless pieces of shit in the world.

BobQuasit · 2022-04-28T03:57:47+00:00

My ex has successfully delayed a court hearing for five years now. She hasn't been paying the court-mandated share of child support for years, even though our son chose to move in with me full time rather than stay with her and her abusive fiance.

She has continued to collect alimony despite having "married" her fiance; they deliberately didn't get a marriage license so they could keep forcing me to pay alimony. She and her fiance-husband go on luxury cruises and vacations every year. I'm lucky if I can take my son to stay with friends or family for a couple of weekends a year.

I filed to have the court recognize that our son is with me full-time and that she has been living as man and wife with another man for years. The court kept recommending mediation. I agreed every time on my lawyer's advice, and she always refused to cooperate with the process. When court dates came up, she always had an excuse. And the court never seemed to care.

I still have another year and a half to go of alimony before it's supposed to expire, although I have a sneaking suspicion that she's going to suddenly have time to go to court and try to get lifetime alimony. She has successfully taken over $60,000 from me and my son. And that's not counting what she took from my retirement funds, which I'm quite sure she has cashed in and given to her ex-felon boyfriend. I will never get to retire.

I obeyed the rules laid down by the family court faithfully. She violated them non-stop for years. The court has done nothing. And yet I can't help but believe that if our positions had been reversed, I would be in jail now.

Family courts are absolutely broken.

Grousers · 2022-04-28T02:54:37+00:00

Simply yes. Shuttered a business I spent 20 years building to make sure I got 50/50 bc I was expected to drop off at 730 and pickup at 3. Three years later still not settled and my contacts are long gone

pegleg_legal · 2022-04-28T02:34:50+00:00

without specifics ... meh.

toooldforthisnonsens · 2022-04-28T01:20:48+00:00

I was called a horrible father because I couldn't cite the grades my son received on days randomly selected by the judge.

Then there's this: https://www.reddit.com/r/atheism/comments/qq41vv/my_lack_of_religious_beliefs_was_used_against_me

fewdo · 2022-04-27T23:00:14+00:00

I didn't get the shaft as bad as it could have been but I share your opinion of the courts and laws. I have had some very bad thoughts during the process. My therapist helped me through that.

If you find any way to improve the system, please let us know so we can help.

Title	Family court horror stories
Author	JonathanApple
Upvotes	19
Comments	32
Date	April 27, 2022 10:17 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/udfh0c/family_court_horror_stories/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/family-court-horror-stories.1113148 https://theredarchive.com/post/1113148

Comments