LTR wants sex constantly, but doesn't take care of herself.

brinkleybuzz · 2017-08-28T16:59:32+00:00

So if the roles were reversed and you were overweight and dressed like a slob and she was a fit, attractive personal trainer, you realize that she probably would have banged someone else by now, right?

Does she ever see other women giving you IOIs and flirting with you. If she doesn't, then start employing dread game. If she does and hasn't stepped up her game, then you have every right to find a woman who will.

LordThunderbolt · 2017-08-28T17:14:30+00:00

How about you stop porking fatties?

[deleted] · 2017-08-28T17:54:28+00:00

Just drop her. This is a common occurrence with girls in LTR.

She gets too comfortable & lets herself go to the point where she's not someone you would have dated in the first place.

chachaChad · 2017-08-28T16:22:05+00:00

I want to tell her I don't find her attractive but I feel like she has a lot of potential, she just needs to take care of her appearance...

DO IT, FAG!

How in the hell is she supposed to know what you want if you don't fucking state it outright. You need to use the exact same words with her that you've used here with us.

EDIT: I do want to point out that I normally don't use the word fag. I don't have any problem with gay people. Was specifically referring to OP's behavior. In the future, I'll try to be a little more respectable to people who are gay. OP is still a pussy.

EDIT: Goddammit... now I have to apologize to pussies.

OP - Sit her down. Tell her.

Metalgear222 · 2017-08-28T20:53:21+00:00

MY question is why isn't this girl a plate? The fuck. Why would you lower your standards and accept a man with a vagina as your girlfriend?

My friend. Listen.. The girl you described in your post is a moped. Fun to ride but you would never want to show/tell your friends.

Mescuzzi · 2017-08-28T16:13:55+00:00

You make her jealous by talking/flirting to girls IN FRONT of her, not while watching TV... lol

Need to brush up on your dread game.

nofilmynofucky · 2017-08-28T19:07:00+00:00

Great example of scarcity mentality

trpthrowaway2003 · 2017-08-28T16:56:27+00:00

You're basically deciding to stay comfortable and unhappy with your current girlfriend.

You will probably have to deal with everyone shaming you, which is likely what you're dreading.

Now, to play devil's advocate.

Good fuckin luck getting a woman to lose 30lbs and wear makeup to sit at home.

If everything is good besides some weight and makeup, I would say at least have the conversation with her about how you're feeling.

Make an effort to be more social as a couple, join a gym and eat right.

If she just decides to play the victim during the conversation, hey you were just honest and you were willing to make changes but she wasn't.

max_peenor · 2017-08-28T18:23:06+00:00

How do I get her to raise her standards for herself?

I don't know, how do I get you to raise your standards for yourself? 15-30lbs? She's fat. Next.

Rian_Stone · 2017-08-28T19:56:13+00:00

She doesn't have to, you haven't given her any reason to believe she will lose you

Chemlab187 · 2017-08-29T00:03:58+00:00

How are you motivating your clients if you can't even motivate your LTR?

Be careful with the "talk to her" advice, don't come across as weak and complaining.

Don't make it a choice for LTR, "I am going to start training you, is MWF better or is TThSat better?" If she doesn't respond appropriately then pick for her.

"We are going out to dinner, I like when you wear that red dress, but that blue one is ok also."

Captain your F'ing ship! Your crew is lazy because you aren't inspiring them to greatness and then requiring it of them!

returnofthemackX · 2017-08-29T02:38:58+00:00

but she just smacks me and says shut up.

What the fuck? Did everyone skip this line?

Viking_RnP · 2017-08-29T00:07:07+00:00

Get your nut off on the side with some chicks you train. Use some of your options out there. Then make a decision. You might find that it's actually you with the problem when all you can pull is a bunch of 30lbs overweight dumpy chicks.

You can't be her discipline or drive. She has to make the decision herself. You have to be worth it. Always look at yourself before you blame the creature you put your dick in.

recursoinominado · 2017-08-29T01:32:07+00:00

Dude, been there twice. Two of my exs were fatties, I tried EVERYTHING to change them ( I know I a lot about gym and nutrition), applied dread and shit. You know what happened? They didn't changed shit. I came out as the evil asshole for not being happy that my gf wasn't even trying to make an effort. Society will judge you for it but you know what? FUCK THEM. Best. Decisions. Ever. Nexted them both, they continued to gain weight and end up with betas while I am happier than ever. You need to raise your standards, dude, for yourself.

iHadou · 2017-08-28T16:05:12+00:00

She might not have any interest in that what so ever. Try some more hints or straight up honest conversation and decide for yourself if its enough to leave over if you dont get the results you wanted. I dk man good luck

[deleted] · 2017-08-28T22:19:54+00:00

Leave her fat ass for a hot woman who actually cares about herself

fromdario · 2017-08-28T23:31:45+00:00

In my experience, you will have a very difficult time changing others.

Personal change needs to come from a motivation within, otherwise it won't last.

You are not getting what you want. It is easier to drop this girl and seek someone who is more on your level. It's your life, don't compromise.

Whisper · 2017-08-28T23:45:42+00:00

Use your words like a big boy.

How can she know what you want if you don't tell her?

JackGetsIt · 2017-08-29T00:54:05+00:00

You'll need to walk away from this one. The minute you denied her sex you changed the dynamic of the relationship irrecoverable. Something breaks inside of women when they are denied sex because they don't have the emotional tools to cope with it. Their hamster goes into overdrive and even if she does clean up her act it's out of intense dread and she will probably resent you for it. Remember in LTR's and marriages you need LIGHT dread not heavy dread. You don't turn women into workout bunnies that rebuild their closet when you stop fucking them.

[deleted] · 2017-08-29T04:51:58+00:00

She is secure in the relationship and convinced you're not going anywhere. Dreadgame her and she will doll up in a hurry.

AfterC · 2017-08-28T23:13:48+00:00

get some side pussy

rahl_r · 2017-08-29T00:29:24+00:00

Telling her, as mentioned, seems like a reasonable solution.

What else?

Some Machiavellian might resort to leaving a laptop on in a place she can't miss, with r/hardbodies on it.

A semi-skilled troll would do similar -- with a fat-shaming site open.

psikosen · 2017-08-29T00:47:56+00:00

Bro be direct tell her period that while you care for her, you are less attractive to me. I like the way you look, u just want you to take care of yourself. I want you to be healthy along with me, and u need you to out that effort in to make it work between us. You need to lead and be direct, don't beat around the bush. If she does not shape up, you guys are not fit to be with one another.

Big_Daddy_PDX · 2017-08-29T02:22:23+00:00

She is setting you up to accept her mediocrity by fucking your brains out. Tell her you don't want sexy as much anymore because she's not as physically attractive at her current weight. Of course she will get pissed and your pussy self is going to have to handle some shit tests, but she'll either lose the weight or lose you.

My ex-wife was like that. Always DTF and great at sex and even liked to bring other girls home for us to fuck. BUT, she could never kick the weight off and she always acted like it was acceptable for her to overweight. Meanwhile, I'm fit like few people in my age group and flirt and get hit on frequently. Yada, yada, yada, my new GF is smoking hot with a great body and we have sex all the time. Sure she's a lot younger, but she's her great body is so sexually satisfying that I don't care about not having threesomes anymore. An amazing upgrade really.

SpinPlates · 2017-08-29T02:35:04+00:00

This is 100% your fault for letting it go this far. Tell her, break up or quit bitching

MattyAnon · 2017-08-29T03:04:04+00:00

my girl wears sweatshirts and sweatpants everywhere and could lose 15-30lbs.

You can't make girls lose weight if they don't wanna. They really hate that shit.

All you can do is say "I'd prefer it if", and that's your lot.

Looks are important to me

No they aren't.

You date a girl you're not really attracted to. Looks are less important to you than something else. What is it? Loyalty? Needing her? Not wanting to offend?

You're keeping this girl (and wanting to change her) rather than getting another. Why?

The questions above are not rhetorical. Answer them honestly for yourself.

I thought I could make her jealous by making comments about girls while watching tv etc, but she just smacks me and says shut up.

Right.... next plan.... dread game. Get more options. Don't see her as your only sexual option (she is using that to avoid losing weight).

How do I get her to raise her standards for herself? I want a girlfriend, not a loving, bloated, baggy dressed homebody.

Then go out and get that.

Moreofmore · 2017-08-29T03:08:11+00:00

This is straight out of no more me nice guy. Read the book. You want her to react to something your not doing and now your upset. Makes no sense until you realize she can't read your thoughts.

NightwingTRP · 2017-08-29T13:43:04+00:00

I talk about going to the gym with her all the time but she shrugs it off.

Do you talk about your feelings too? What the fuck are you "talking" about? You don't talk to her about it. You tell her to get her fat ass down the gym.

but she just smacks me and says shut up.

Oh wait. You allow total disrespect of yourself. You carry on porking fatties then. You get the level you deserve for your efforts. This is all correctly in line.

chachaChad · 2017-08-29T13:54:00+00:00

Honestly I know of guy that loved his wife and she wanted sex with him all the but since she became a hamplanet, he just could fuck her. Took him over a year of therapy to come up with a list of shit she had to do for him to stay. Top of the list of was take care of herself and lose the weight. She finally got it. Lost the weight, exercises like a monster and had skin reduction surgery. Now all she talks about is how she's glad she made the decision to lose weight and take care of herself. He doesn't care who takes credit for it but now he plows her day and night.

Tell her. If she changes, fine. If she doesn't, leave her and go fuck human size women. Takes balls to do something like this. Good thing OP has two, right?

[deleted] · 2017-08-30T03:24:37+00:00

You can bet your ass when you dump her she'll be hitting the gym and out at the club in some skimpy getup.

normielife · 2017-08-28T16:56:32+00:00

So you want your gf to dress like a basic bitch in public with her tits and cameltoe out so that a greater chad will steal/fuck her.

Ok

I'm older and think these women in yoga pants and tons of cleavage look like cheap tarts.

LTR wants sex constantly, but doesn't take care of herself.

Comments

triggerwarning

Title	LTR wants sex constantly, but doesn't take care of herself.
Author	normielife
Upvotes	41
Comments	67
Date	August 28, 2017 3:59 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/6wkasy/ltr_wants_sex_constantly_but_doesnt_take_care_of/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/ltr-wants-sex-constantly-but-doesnt-take-care-of.113290 https://theredarchive.com/post/113290