Husband asked me if I’m slow… is this contempt?

herzogin_eva · 2022-11-02T23:32:10+00:00

So, according to your other post, you agreed to let your husband have hall passes ('because he's an Alpha male' or whatever) and now he's telling you that he thinks you're dumb? Worse than that, he buckles down on it, like he has a right to tear down your self-esteem? And he never apologises?

No, this isn't normal, at least not for couples that love and respect each other.

sparklyyblueberryy · 2022-11-03T02:56:49+00:00

"I'm sorry you felt that way" is a red flag...

Competitive-Gas3935 · 2022-11-03T07:10:25+00:00

Just right off the bat, so no one gets the wrong idea.. your husband is 100% wrong in this

Other than that. I think Laura Doyle suggests responding with “ouch” In these situations rather than lecturing your partner on what he did wrong and he he didn’t handle it well, as it won’t go down well. I myself noticed that my partner is a lot more responsive to my needs and is much quicker to recognise when he’s harsh when I just say ouch and spare him the tirade

sunglasses90 · 2022-11-03T00:33:49+00:00

If it were my partner I’d be out the door immediately and off to a friends house family’s house to cool down from that level of disrespect. He can cook his own dinner and care for himself if he doesn’t respect me. I wouldn’t be back in the house without an apology.

Your man really isn’t very high value if he’s disrespecting you.

teaandtalk · 2022-11-03T05:02:35+00:00

Would you like him to talk to your future children that way?

TheBunk_TB · 2022-11-03T13:35:42+00:00

How much abuse can you handle?

bear_sees_the_car · 2022-11-03T08:49:40+00:00

Being dominant can go fully fine with being respectful.

I do not understand how a loving husband can talk to his woman like that.

It is simply not a way a man respecting/loving you would talk. You should reconsider the whole marriage.

Wicked1Perceptions · 2022-11-03T12:13:17+00:00

It sure is.

Parsnip_Useful · 2022-11-03T16:05:38+00:00

This is a very small issue but speaks alot about what I find unacceptable about red pill or patriarchy. Though sometimes I find myself understanding patriarchy. But when the man, in the name of being a 'leader' misuses his authority to degrade you, make you feel inferior, control you, thats when liberal way of living seems better in the aspect of being recognized as a person and not be dismissed.

Its important to have a man who has the best interests for both you and him.

brushshstrokes · 2022-11-03T11:45:02+00:00

Some people suck at apologizing. It may not be one of his strong suits. Just let him know it bothers you and notice him when he does well.

AutoModerator · 2022-11-02T23:09:43+00:00

Title: Husband asked me if I’m slow… is this contempt?

Full text: My husband was explaining a sports concept to me (I know next to zilch about sports) and I had a slow moment and wasn’t understanding something very obvious. In a non-joking way- he even said “I’m serious” afterwards- he said are you slow?? That was very remedial. Then when I told him that wasn’t a great way to handle things he just stonewalled me by not responding and going back to what he was doing. I don’t know if I’ve ever heard him say “I’m sorry” for something he’s done- at most it’d be “I’m sorry you felt that way”. Is this normal? Can anyone else relate??

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werthtrillions · 2022-11-03T20:25:02+00:00

Good God. Girl, he is walking all over you. He literally does not have the ability to say "sorry" because he's emotionally immature and no amount of giving him what he wants or needs will change that fact, that's something he needs to come to terms with on his own, but the only way he will is if he's forced and honestly if you left him tomorrow, it still wouldn't force him because he already knows he has you wrapped around his little finger. This man is not going to change for you. What you need to work on is gaining some self-esteem and self-respect. You need to know your worth. Is this man worth your time, a man who's unable to say sorry, who's immature and calls you slow? If you're answer to this question is "yes," you have some deep soul searching to do.

Title	Husband asked me if I’m slow… is this contempt?
Author	dressedindignity
Upvotes	32
Comments	30
Date	November 2, 2022 11:09 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/ykl3pm/husband_asked_me_if_im_slow_is_this_contempt/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/husband-asked-me-if-im-slow-is-this-contempt.1138361 https://theredarchive.com/post/1138361

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