I've had 2 girlfriends before, the first being in freshman year college (we were each other's first), and the second being someone I met shortly after college.

That second girlfriend had a "hot girl summer" before me. And she was open about it, didn't feel the need to hide it. And contrary to what you might expect, I wasn't bothered by that as well. This is because she still vetted the guys she encountered, whether it was through apps or in person. She told me how she would always meet them in person first, maybe for a drink, and she would see if she vibes with him or feel comfortable, before eventually going back to his/her place. And if the guy gave off fkboy vibes, she would not continue with him. She also had a preference towards FWBs instead of one night stands. And most importantly, she made sure that each one of her partners wore a condoms, no exceptions. In total, she had slept with 6 guys in the summer before me, which was after a breakup from a long relationship as well.

Regardless of the number of bodies, I was never at all intimidated by that because it's totally fine to have casual sex, as long as it's done safe (emotionally and physically). The fact that she made sure that there was a bare minimum connection and effort to vibe made it easier for me to respect her for not going below her standards (even for a casual fling).

Recently, being single for a while now, I've tried using dating apps to put myself out there again. My 2 previous girlfriends were also my only sexual partners, and I had no interest in doing anything casual. I was able to get some matches with women who claimed that they wanted a relationship. But this is where things differed from that last ex I mentioned.

As an example, one of the last women I spoke to also had a hoe phase. However, the way she explained it, she told me how after her breakup she had needed validation, and happened to seek the hottest guys on tinder, who just so happened to be fkboys. This is to say that those guys put no effort into vibing with her, or talking about anything beyond "U up?" and "DTF?". And worst of all, she told me how she used condoms with "most" of them, but some didn't because of alcohol and the heat of the moment. (although she tried to justify it by saying how she was on the pill...). This bothered me, because I was turned off by her desire to seek validation from the worst possible guys you can imagine. She described their personalities in the most possible ways, yet she still willingly wanted to hookup with them (unsafely nonetheless). Meanwhile, those guys had to make no effort at all to hookup with her, and likely just saw her as an object rather than a human being with mutual needs.

My point is, past sexual encounters aren't so bad if that person acted responsibly. The difficult thing, however, is that you obviously can't go around asking your dates about their past hookup history (in my case, we both randomly talked about it when discussing past relationships). But this is just to show my view on it. Couldn't care less about the body count (as long as it isn't overwhelming, which I know most men/women can agree on), but just the type of people that they chose to do that intimate act with.