Adding stats since I didn’t last time:

I’m 42, 5’11”, 210 lbs, 16% BF (inbody, down from 19% in September), lifting Strong Lifts Madcow 5x5 3x per week, cardio and other lifts 2-3x per week. I have a shoulder injury that affects my bench so I’m not as consistent as I need to be yet, but did 255 x 3 in my SL workout last week. Couldn’t repeat this week. DL 215 x 5, SQ 165 x 5. I obviously need to continue work on legs.

I’ve been using lots of kino and affection the last couple of months, say since October. For the most part it’s been ignored, sometimes she’d pull away. We’d have shitty sex every once in a while, but outside of that she even stopped changing in front of me. She’ll go in her closet and close the door to change when I’m standing right there in the bathroom.

I’ve been initiating frequently, several times a week, and almost always get denied. She said once a week is plenty and normal and I should be happy with that. Obviously I’m not, it drives me crazy every day. I try to hide it, STFU, and go do something else. Lately she’s been accusing me of being butt hurt since I don’t get in bed and watch a shitty show with her anymore.

We had an unexpected week of good sexual activity the week before and up through Christmas. A bet over something on tv led to me getting a bj for the first time in almost 5 months. A couple days later she initiated and we had an awesome session, then again the next day. I got another bj a couple days later, Christmas morning she woke me up for a session at 4 am, then another bj later that day. I thought things had finally turned around.

The next week things slowed down and I started getting rejected again, nothing over NY weekend, and one lackluster session this past Sunday where I didn’t get to finish. I’ve initiated all week and been rejected. So obviously the good week was a fluke and now I feel like I’m just wasting my time and effort and getting angry again.

I know you’re supposed to “always be gaming your wife”, but is there a limit when she’s not responding? It’s to the point where it’s just adding to the frustration of getting denied and shitty sex when it does happen. What about reduced initiations?