I have this hypothesis that men and women project their expectations of an ideal partner onto themselves. What I mean by that is that they behave the way they would like their partner to behave even though the partner doesn't necessarily like this behavior. They do so because men and women have different expectations and often fail at recognizing the expectations of the other.

To name a few examples:
1. Men work hard to obtain ideal physique because that's what makes women attractive to them (obsessed exercising can turn off women)
2. Women often communicate they are highly independent because they want a man to be highly Independent (and independence often repels men)
3. Women often like to surprise their partners with a trip to romantic places (because that's what they find exciting themselves) while many men consider this bothersome
4. Men get overly (and I mean in an exaggerated manner) sensitive and caring when dealing with their partners because they want to be treated like this themselves, while it can lead to repulsion
5. Men please women too much because they want to be treated this way (opposite would be to occasionally say "no" and only stick to their own values) but experience has shown over and over that this repels women

In contrary, what partners often do not do and what speaks in favor of this hypothesis:
1. Women rarely spend time gaming or doing technical things with their male partners because they consider it bothersome, without understanding the importance of it for their partners
2. Men tend to not make sexual acts mysterious or special but rather "go directly all in" with animalistic traits, because well, they like it direct

You could also describe this as a lack of understanding of what the opposite gender really needs in a partner.

Like always, when making generalizations we are talking about statistics. I think that this is a tendency (about heterosexuals) that people must be aware of. Even though sometimes we dislike traits of the other gender we have to accept them how they are and make the best out of it. Relationships are a balance of giving and receiving, so act accordingly.