Why is being single "wrong?

eatfleshdrinkblood · 2023-06-03T21:48:57+00:00

There isn’t anything wrong with it, if you want to stay single it’s your choice. It’s just I’ve been single pretty much my entire adult life. And I don’t really want to be anymore but I don’t know how to get a girlfriend. Also I’m a guy so it’s probably a little different for me than it is for you .

thetruthishere_ · 2023-06-03T22:17:49+00:00

Its not, its others projecting their own issues.

osm0sis · 2023-06-04T11:14:36+00:00

It's better to be single than sacrifice your happiness to force a relationship into your life because that's what you feel like "you're supposed to do".

Building great relationships is extremely rewarding. Having great bonds with friends, with family, neighbors, and your extended community will make you a happier person in my opinion.

If you find somebody you click with romantically and want to spend the rest of your life with that's awesome! But don't fall for the trap of thinking that finding a spouse and making kids is the only path to a rewarding life. That can make you happy under the right circumstances, but a lot of people end up absolutely miserable because they overlooked toxicity in relationships because they were so focused on marriage and kids because "that's what you're supposed to do" and that miserability has life long consequences.

Focus on finding happiness and authenticity.

KingKunta2-D · 2023-06-04T06:57:32+00:00

Thing is it's not wrong for a woman to be single in my eyes or in anyone's eyes that makes sense. You're waiting for the guy. The one! And you don't need to compromise for that.

But there is a difference in that view. As a man if you're single. "It's a red flag"

"What you've never dated anyone before? What's wrong with you? Are you not a man? Are you that sweaty that you can't attract a woman romantically".

There's no glory in being a virgin as a man. And I know we're not talking about virginity we're talking about singleness. But let's be honest if a guy single single he's probably never had a wiff of getting a girlfriend. If a woman single she's just rejecting until she gets the right suitor which is appropriate in society. Unlike the former

BaDubz15 · 2023-06-04T02:24:57+00:00

There is nothing wrong with being single. Its important to keep improving yourself and maintain your career no matter your relationship status. I think ideally, finding a partner whose lifestyle fits yours and you can have a relationship where you can work together and encourage each other to reach those goals together. We all have emotional, social, and sexual needs and finding the right partner can satisfy all of those, but its not required. You can find friends and family as well as groups for different hobbies to fill any companionship roles you need. Sex toys, porn, and other avenues can also satisfy people sexually, of course in moderation as to not develop addictions. Not everyone needs a partner but its best to figure out your needs are and if you really need a partner to fill those needs.

PutsWomenOnPedestal · 2023-06-05T00:06:54+00:00

It’s not wrong? I personally think the majority of people will be happier living the way you describe. But we are all suckered in by the Hollywood false dream of “romance”

Suitable_Discount537 · 2023-06-06T01:11:46+00:00

I’m nearly 24 and never even had a girlfriend before but i don’t really let it affect me. If a girl sees that as a “red flag” i couldn’t care less.

Kdawg510 · 2023-06-04T20:31:49+00:00

Nothing wrong with being single at all. Anyone who tells you otherwise is only trying to make you feel bad so they can compensate for their lack of self-esteem.

Downtown_Cat_1172 · 2023-06-04T03:36:52+00:00

It’s part of the patriarchy to teach women that they should frame all their wants and desires around having a husband.

HelenHavok · 2023-06-04T03:12:20+00:00

15% of Americans are single and content with their non-relationship status. I’m only in my 30s, but I know several people who are long-term happily single folks. There’s nothing wrong with flying solo. People may pressure you, but ignore them. Do what works for you.

Modernity_7 · 2023-06-04T17:03:12+00:00

Even though we're much more technologically advanced than our ancestors, women still need men by default. If all the men in the world were to disappear, women wouldn't survive. I know that's not politically correct but it's the truth. Look at all the fields dominated by men: construction, electricians, engineers, small business owners, firefighters, police officers, military, etc. All of these fields are male dominated and pay really well. Society can function without them.

Even though women have all the freedom and equality to get into these fields, the majority of them choose not to. All the first world conveniences you enjoy (running water, infrastructure, electricity) are because of men. Once again, men work these jobs that women don't, hence why accidental workplace death rates are higher for men than they are for women.

The majority of brick layers, people who clean sewers and pick up trash off the streets, are men. The majority of inventors and creators are men. Tampons, birth control, paternity tests, all invented by men. Without men, women can't survive. Have you ever seen those survival shows like naked and afraid, where a production crew takes a group of men and a group of women and place them on an island, and they have to survive for like a week or so? What I have concluded from watching these shows is that women always fail to survive without men. However, the men are flourishing. They can hunt, gather resources, build shelter, etc. Men are just build to be providers, women are not.

Now, as for dating, a women can choose to be single if she wants, I just think that she is making a big mistake by doing that. In the end, a woman's innate happiness and satisfaction in life will be from a husband, children, and a family, not a career. Studies have shown that by 2030, nearly half of women here in the West will be single with no kids. Birth rates have dropped, and nearly half of marriages end in divorce, with 80% of them being initiated by women. 1 in 4 women these days is on anti depressants and anti anxiety medication. The least happiest demographic in America is a woman whose in her 40s, making $100k a year with no kids. Women will not derive the same pleasure or fulfillment from financial success that a man will. Women are more interested in people, men are more interested in resources and things.

https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/products/databriefs/db377.htm#:~:text=A%20significant%20increasing%20trend%20was,over%20the%2010%2Dyear%20period.

https://www.wsj.com/articles/why-so-many-middle-aged-women-are-on-antidepressants-11648906393

https://www.eviemagazine.com/post/meet-the-unhappiest-person-in-america

Naus1987 · 2023-06-04T04:06:03+00:00

I actually discovered Red Pill, because they were preaching the joys and value of living a solo lifestyle. The whole "going your own way" movement. I had no idea all this other hateful toxic shit came attached, lol!

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I think one of the biggest problems is that a LOT of people don't know how to think for themselves. So they just jump from one ideology to another. Like following social groups. And lifepaths are like that too. People just don't think about what they want. They date because society tells them to. They don't date if society tells them that.

The thing is, people are unique and very different. Different people value different things. So a lot of times people will try one thing and follow it for awhile, and then over time develop some inner-conflicts as their soul doesn't align with their lifestyle. So they jump ship to another ideology.

A problem with life though, is we all get older, and some lifestyle choices have intense consequences that are incredibly hard to shake, or stay with us forever.

So when you get a bunch of people who don't really know what they want. Half-blindedly follow random bullshit they see on the internet, and then switch around a bunch--you just get miserable old people.

The ironic part is being single would be great for a lot of people, but even that conflicts with their inability to shift away from the narrative. People still want to be told what to do, even if it's not what's best for them.

And you're right, a lot of people don't take full responsibility for themselves, or their happiness. Which is weird, because you'd think those are some of the things people would value most, lol.

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Always kinda reminds me of those dumb men who complain about offing themselves, because they're too lonely. But they're also afraid to ask women out.

Their fear of rejection is stronger than their fear of death. And that's such a messed up way people mindfuck themselves. They don't know how to make quality comparisons.

Because seriously, if they were ready to just "throw it all away," then they shouldn't be afraid to just ask people out. They don't think about why they do or feel the way they do. They just jump to whatever conclusion they hear. No introspection.

"No take ball. Only throw!"

Midnightchickover · 2023-06-04T04:43:10+00:00

My mindset is exactly as you describe and it’s the way I’ve learned through school and life experience, just as much from parents who although have completely different experiences and worldviews was never rely on other people for much of anything.

Being and only child, not really wanting to follow crowds, I just did my own thing and made myself help. I hate to say this, but a lot of people and groups who gravitated towards me in adulthood were always needy and demanding. Being a giver, self-reliant, keeping myself entertained, and making sure I had my own money and place/spaces. I think people always wanted me to be a replacement mommy or big sister, and even a partial father figure 🤮 (I’m a trans woman$. I much rather be friends than to people where we are on equal footing.

When I found relationships like this, I was most comfortable. I didn’t need a partner to take care of me emotionally, financially, sexually, and domestically. I personally think it puts alot of obligations on one person and can make relationships, draining and even unbearable. Especially, when people have so many expectations of their partners, bring a lot of emotional and liability baggage, and the inescapable gender roles to the table.

I didn’t have a lot of success for years in relationships, because I was given, forgave people often, and cater to them. They didn’t deserve that level of support or care from me. I happily found a person who did. She’s a wonderful companion. We didn’t need to fix anything in each other, yet strengthen our shortercomings and help in more ways we don’t see and a few typical ones partners do.

SilverTango · 2023-06-04T07:31:01+00:00

I don't think most people want to be alone. I don't think we are designed to be alone. I think most people, if given the chance, would jump at the chance of a fulfilling, lasting relationship with the right person. But relationships are hard and they take work, and it's difficult to meet people you are attracted to, who are also attracted to you.

No-Chance-8405 · 2023-06-05T11:27:50+00:00

Being single is not wrong, and it's way better than being in a bad/toxic relationship.

If you find a partner though who is wonderful, supportive and makes you feel happy and grateful for being alive, this relationship is priceless and is worth taking any risks. It's not about whether you 'need' a man; it's about sharing your life with someone you love.

In the end it's only up to you what you value more. Singles can be very happy too. It's just a different life style with a different focus. For me personally: great relationship > single > bad relationship. Everybody will have their own priorities, and whatever you pursue it's certainly not wrong.

lostkarma4anonymity · 2023-06-07T19:03:15+00:00

I've had so many men tell me I must be unhappy because I am single women with no kids. Ironically, they are all Uber drivers.

Sir, just shut up and drop me off at the international flight terminal so I can my flight to Italy on time.

autistic_adult · 2023-06-07T22:48:12+00:00

No thing wrong with beung single

25 virgin and never had a gf. Got rejected a opportunity fir sex cuz the women didnt wamt to sleep with a virgin. Other than that im doing fine and im surrounded by amaxinh friends that i love a lot

Nightchanger · 2023-06-23T09:22:02+00:00

Single men are seen as less responsible and people in relatinships are excused regularly to put time in their relationships especially if kids are involved or marriage. I have no idea about lovers as frankly I'm terrible in it.

The drama is that people either pity, dismiss, or ignore you. Your stress is immense but is just in no one's periphery to consider.

When in a relationship you at least have the safety of having someone, and the freedom to have different interactions. When single out of choice you have none, and the expectations it's your fault.

If I was to live in a trailer and had friends over that'll be fine. But most of my friends excuse themselves to their partner, family, marriage, while not lifting a finger to visit me outside their town while expecting me to take a bus ride for 3 hours If I want to meet them.

It will be better to have a relationship. But nobody is forced to be with me if they don't want to. And i'm not going to pretend being single is a good thing.

MountainPale8783 · 2023-07-12T14:32:01+00:00

Because i would feel lonely without a another person who i could always count on and makes my days even better then they already are.

Beeing 70ti and having no Partner and no Children would be horror for me personaly but not everyone is the same.

If you feel more comfortable with yourself beeing single that's totaly fine too. It comes down to personal preference.

Title	Why is being single "wrong?
Author	Accomplished_Bus1375
Upvotes	30
Comments	64
Date	June 3, 2023 8:45 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/13zozpt/why_is_being_single_wrong/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/why-is-being-single-wrong.1221204 https://theredarchive.com/post/1221204

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