Told a girl I was seeing that I would be seeing other women as well, she was fine with it....

abdada · 2018-02-20T13:42:29+00:00

Of course she's bragging, she's following your lead.

Why you would actually bring up "the talk" is beyond me. You destroyed any sense of mystery or dread, too.

So what that she's fucking other dudes, she's not yours, she's a fun gal you invite over when you want her to visit.

ashleyshafer27 · 2018-02-20T13:57:40+00:00

Hahahha you thought you were a big tough macho red pilled man and your plate called your sorry blue ass bluff. You see how pathetic and hypocritical you look? She's not yours, you're just the warmup for her sexy beast.

trpcounsel · 2018-02-20T14:45:17+00:00

You're her plate.

VasiliyZaitzev · 2018-02-20T14:06:21+00:00

Told a girl I was seeing that I would be seeing other women as well, she was fine with it....

And? She's a plate. What she does with her pussy while off-duty is up to her.

What’s my move here?

Forget about it and don't mention it. She's not your gf, she's just a plate.

chachaChad · 2018-02-20T14:12:48+00:00

Wait... you gave her the all clear to go ahead and fuck other people and you're somehow surprised that a female didn't have any trouble filling a hole?

Of course she was fine with it. She's had 10 dicks on hold ready to jump on. Nice move.

fnordsnord · 2018-02-20T15:55:21+00:00

Okay - you've broken some fundamentals here.

First, never, ever bring up whether you're banging other women. That's HER job. She can assume what she wants.

You essentially told her she was a fuck toy, and so this is her way of tell you YOU are one too. She's trying to rattle you.

This may be her way of trying to get YOU to press for commitment.

Plate her, or LTR her. Choose one. You don't get both.

If you want to plate her, your way forward is to ignore this like it doesn't matter, (because it shouldn't), spin other plates, and hit her up for a meet in 3 - 5 days.

PreOrgasmGroanLness · 2018-02-20T14:31:13+00:00

lmao u told her that ure both not exclusive then u think she owes u exclusivity or anything

what the fuck

IronJohnKwando · 2018-02-20T14:27:52+00:00

dude, what? she's a plate. You straight up said "I'm going to be seeing other women from time to time." And you expected her to not do the same?

As for your move, you're already bent out of shape about it, so you gotta accept that this is part of the deal. You bang other women, she bangs other men, neither of you are exclusive. Accept it. She's one in your rotation. No need to "shake" her. No need to let her know that you can walk. That's for you to know and believe.

FlyingSexistPig · 2018-02-20T14:51:09+00:00

You're funny.

Women, which is to say a woman who is 20-30 and not fat, have options. Lots of them. 95% of guys find them attractive. Their only competition is other women, and let's face it, one young guy can easily satisfy dozens of women.

So when you told her you'd be seeing other people too, it gave her the green light to fuck as many guys as she wanted to. So she is.

RAiderNat88 · 2018-02-20T15:53:29+00:00

I also told her, “I really like you, but I just want you to know I’ll be seeing other women from time to time.”

Next time stfu, you wanna talk about your stuff do so with your boys. You acted very feminine bringing up that you really like her and also that you're seeing other women. What did you want her to do, beg you not to? You basically broke your own plate out of your need to brag to her.

Yesterday I texted her, and she texted back a few hours later, apologizing saying she was talking to a friend. I thought nothing of it.

You've been demoted in her book from fwb to plate. You've given her permission to show you that you are just a plate the way you have told her she's one.

I wake up today to a pic of her and some guy in bed. “#sexybeast hearteyes” on instagram. This kinda fucked me up.

You've invested more feelings and shit than you think you have. That fucked up feeling you're having is your oneitis screaming to have her only to yourself. Now you're acting like a beta bitch and feeling all butthurt about it.

Here I am trying to keep my plates under wraps out of respect,

No you're not, if you were you would have never brought up the other girls you're supposedly seeing.

So this for me, puts her in the category of “game player”.

No this puts you in the category of dumbass.

What’s my move here? I wanna do something to shake her, let her know, I can walk at anytime. But still don’t wanna over so it. Any ideas?

The fact that you want to retaliate to something that was not wrong shows that you are still in the wrong mental state. A good move would be to keep scheduling meetups for your bumping uglies sessions, but it sounds like you're not going to be able to let this go. For you sir, I'd say decrease the amount of time and meetups you give her and increase the time with (and add) more plates. A lot of guys throw the "I can walk at anytime" phrase out there like some kind of smoke grenade to cover up the beta bullshit they spill in these posts but we see right through you. This is all to help you learn don't get butthurt with my words.

walawalawa · 2018-02-20T14:17:50+00:00

Here I am trying to keep my plates under wraps out of respect, or at least not flaunt my savagery....

Note to self: in future...flaunt my savagery. Or better yet, keep it under wraps.

You've learned a few Red Pill truths:

All Women Are Like That (AWALT)
Hypergamy. Classic example
Don't believe what women say...watch what they do.

If it's any consolation, something similar happened to me and yes, it did hit me hard from an ego standpoint.

"Wait...did she just do what I think she did!??" Next time i was smarter.

ghostofstevemcqueen · 2018-02-20T20:51:35+00:00

Read all this guy's stuff before going down that road again:

http://www.blackdragonblog.com/

AggressiveBeta · 2018-02-20T15:31:58+00:00

Why do you even have Instagram in the first place? Following a woman on social media puts you in a her frame by giving her attention and validation, and anything on your profile takes all the mystery out of yourself for her. Total loss of tingles. So unless you’re an internet celebrity, ditch all social media.

Secondly, you assumed that she was not sleeping with other guys just because she didn’t admit it when you said you were sleeping with other girls. Why?

Third, why the hell did you even bring up the fact that you’re sleeping with other girls in the first place? It’s her job to bring up the “what are we” conversation, not yours.

Finally, you have oneitis for a girl who is not LTR material. If you can’t handle it, your next move is to either next her or get over it.

chazthundergut · 2018-02-20T16:24:32+00:00

You set the rules first. She's just following your lead.

Few mistakes:

You didn't have to overtly say "I'll be seeing other women" ... unless she specifically asks. Even then, the best idea is to be vague and non-committal
You need to have the genuine abundance to back up your game. You want to act like a red pill player, but look how you unravelled when she buzzed you on it. SPIN PLATES. SEE OTHER WOMEN. DON'T TALK ABOUT IT- BE ABOUT IT

NordJitsu · 2018-02-20T16:52:50+00:00

From the fact that she brought up the talk (mentioned in OPs comments below), you can tell this girl wants commitment. You signaled you didn’t want that too, you’re seeing other girls. She may have TOLD you she was fine with it, but her actions show she’s moving on. She told you why she wanted and you said no.

You can try to keep her as a plate. If you do that you don’t get to care about who else she’s fucking. Probably won’t be successful because she’s looking for commitment and no longer expects to get that from you.

LTR is off the table now. You’ll never recover from this.

Personally I’d next her. She’s a low value skank to be championing her sexual exploits on social media. Just never talk to her again and find a better woman.

GunnarX · 2018-02-20T18:19:44+00:00

This is why I don’t have plates on social media (other than Snapchat). If one were to pull this on Snapchat, however, she’d be dropped before you could say ‘non-LTR material’.

slip_like_space · 2018-02-20T19:35:36+00:00

Sounds like you were her plate. Assume that any of your plates are spinning other plates, always. You were close to oneitis. Shrug it off, ghost her if you have to, and go find more plates.

dr_warlock · 2018-02-21T02:11:09+00:00

They are never okay with it, no matter what they say. They merely tolerate it. They ALL want more.

pohlrich · 2018-02-21T06:43:35+00:00

Double standards. You wanted your cake and eat it. She had the option too but you dont want her too therefore you should have said at the start.

What’s my move here? I wanna do something to shake her, let her know, I can walk at anytime. But still don’t wanna over so it. Any ideas?

shes already gone, she already doesn't care whatever you say, anything you say now makes you look like a lil bitch. she instagram that and has no respect for you. You dont want it to be over but it already is. accept it. gone. chad has been out-chadded. it was just your turn. now its over.

dont bother thinking of her, no texting no replys. nothing. when she realises she hasn't heard from you and you're gone she'll realise, but you gotta forget her and stop any fantasy. now you got other options, call your other options and go play.

[deleted] · 2018-02-20T14:33:02+00:00

Any frame you had before is now lost.

DadOnDabs · 2018-02-20T16:00:28+00:00

Lmao. Yeah she's a hoe. Anyway this is a convo you have after the second time you fuck and you have to word it differently. I word it like, "So I just want to be forward with you since I've had problems with this before but I'm not looking for anything exclusive right now."

Then you either go your separate ways or she's a plate.

quicklogaccount · 2018-02-20T18:49:47+00:00

“I really like you, but I just want you to know I’ll be seeing other women from time to time.”

Why would you, ever, say some shit like that?
For god's sake, it's not a "game" because there's an algorithm to winning, it's not tic tac toe. It's a "game" because, to play, you're rather knowing how the other person plays. How she behaves.
Do you happen to be aware about how much your line is off putting?

This kinda fucked me up.

Ok, I hope you knew that you're your plate's plate as well. If you didn't, well, there you are. You're your plate's plate.

This kinda fucked me up.

That's because you have oneitis for her, it was showing in "I really like you".

Here I am trying to keep my plates under wraps out of respect,

So... You kind of sucked at that "respect" bit. What she heard when you said that was:
"You're a good chick but you're not the chick that is good enough for me to commit to a relationship with and to provide for, so do be aware that I'll be looking for a better chick while we're at it."
You're not dating men, you learned to account for the differences in the perception of value to pick them up, learn how to account for them if you want to respect women the way they want to be respected.

or at least not flaunt my savagery, and she’s sitting here bragging.

Well, you should have know that'd happen. We'll brag and let others know we're fucking a million chicks while the whole thing is novel for us, we'll be bragging because we're acing something society taught us is "taboo", forbidden, hard to do. Once we realize it's not, it'll lose its appeal and its shine, and we're bound to stop feeling like we're special because of it. Not to lose the opportunity, PUAs fuck up their lives because they keep pursuing this initial thrill once it wears off.
Now, that's not the same with gals. They do account one's capacity to seduce in one's value, being capable to fuck hot men makes a woman valuable for others, taming him a lot more. They WILL brag, to others, themselves and guys.
She's showing the world she's a sexual woman that tamed and owned a guy, so... It's hardly about you.

Any ideas?

I never told my current girlfriend that I was seeing other chicks, it was implicit that I would for as long as we weren't committed. She found out, got offended and sought a way to tell me she'd go on a date with another guy.
I got pissed as FUCK with the inherent disrespect of her making me condone with it and went on to give her one farewell bang to never call her again.
Then she regretted and took back what she said. And the next day I picked up a tinderella because I would anyway, until we agreed on exclusivity.

Title	Told a girl I was seeing that I would be seeing other women as well, she was fine with it....
Author	Sheepsaysmoo
Upvotes	14
Comments	51
Date	February 20, 2018 1:41 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/7yvxzl/told_a_girl_i_was_seeing_that_i_would_be_seeing/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/told-a-girl-i-was-seeing-that-i-would-be-seeing.124332 https://theredarchive.com/post/124332

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