How do you survive financially even with a prenup?

blinkyvx · 2024-02-22T20:44:41+00:00

Bro, calm down. 1st off, go lawyer shopping. Nothing in this process happens quickly so take a week to find one that explains everything. I talked to 4. 2nd off, you have your marital and nonmarital finances. Everything that happened from the time you got married to the time you get divorced*(you can argue time you separated if you really want to fight) is going to get divided in half. That's the system. 3rd off, don't do anything rash with large amounts of money until you run it by your lawyer. Depending on how amicable you are it can all get argued over.

gnealhou · 2024-02-22T16:50:59+00:00

I'm not sure repairs make sense if you're going to sell the house. I'd think whatever money you put in would be less than you got out. But if you really want to fix it up, look into a HELOC loan.

Do not cash out your 401k. You can take loans against it under certain conditions. A loan will give you some margin to either repay it or default. The default will be roughly equivalent to a cash out, so really, it's a time advantage. Research the penalties. If you do withdraw, expect a big tax bill. Set aside some money in anticipation.

Google "average cost of divorce in <your area>". The average cost here is $19k. Kids, psychiatrists, contention will +/- that a lot. But my lawyer uncannily seemed to target that $19k. She got me a good settlement tho.

If it's a simple divorce, try filing via a paralegal. It'll be a fraction of the cost. And a paralegal will know how to push paperwork that the judge will accept.

Best of luck.

RideATX · 2024-02-22T15:19:21+00:00

Bro, relax. losing 12k in a divorce is chump change in the grand scheme of things. You are going to be fine. Get a good lawyer and listen to them, manage their time and move as quickly as possible. You are going to be fine.

No-Exit6560 · 2024-02-22T09:04:01+00:00

I had a binding financial agreement, that’s an Australian nuptial agreement that you sign after you’re married so it’s very, very solid.

So, I had one of those in place, along with all my assets being in my home country.

Thanks to those factors I managed to keep ALL my shit, my investments and recourse and we now have an equal custody agreement and she didn’t get a dime out of me and isn’t receiving child support.

She was beyond inconsolable when she realized she wasn’t going to get the big payday she thought she was going to get.

Visual_Cycle_1066 · 2024-02-22T05:18:59+00:00

Slow down brother, you're spinning. Close your eyes and take 10 slow deep breaths, slowly in and out dude. I'm not kidding, do it.

First things first - pay a lawyer. Hire a good one. Pay them. Don't be penny -wise and pound-foolish. Pay a lawyer and game-plan a strategy for the best possible outcome.

She needs to set up the move out. No piecemeal BS. One day, moving company, get it done, out, OUT.

As for what to do with the 401K money, see paragraph 1. Slow down. That's a decision for later,

FUMoney · 2024-02-22T04:11:27+00:00

You need a lawyer who is going to fight like hell to enforce your prenup. That is a valuable contract. Don’t give up on it. Do not.

HerbEverstanks · 2024-02-22T03:55:52+00:00

One of my lawyer bills was $19k for 2 weeks (4 days of trial). I had to pay her lawyer $21k. I have to pay her $490k. I have no kids. I guess it’s all subjective, but I would have loved to just lose 25k

Old-Macaroon8148 · 2024-02-22T02:27:45+00:00

Are you in MI? I started off with ADAM and I got a very bad impression that they were far more concerned about collecting fees than helping me. I ditched them after the 3rd interaction and went with a different firm.

Reflog1791 · 2024-02-22T01:48:49+00:00

Initially the financial fallout seems severe. It won’t always feel like that.

Money is not everything!! You can be happier with less money. When you’re talking about $25k just trust me make your life better and the sting will wear off.

My cheating bitchy ex wife got like $200k off my hard work. I got over it and it wasn’t that hard. It’s actually easy to build a lovely fulfilling fun life even after losing your house and half your dough when bitchy ex wife isn’t around.

That is what you’re paying for at the end of the day. For example, I wake up for work on a Monday feeling fine and happy. Golfed twice over the weekend. In no universe would I be that happy with what’s her face killing my joy like it’s her damn job lol.

captainchippsixx · 2024-02-21T23:51:35+00:00

You might want to consult more attorneys that has more confidence in their answers.

I would negotiate not taking on her debt. Otherwise y oh want half the shit she bought. 3 years and a prenup. She had to have come into the marriage with debt.

Title	How do you survive financially even with a prenup?
Author	blinkyvx
Upvotes	7
Comments	23
Date	February 21, 2024 11:37 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1awr6jv/how_do_you_survive_financially_even_with_a_prenup/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/how-do-you-survive-financially-even-with-a-prenup.1246077 https://theredarchive.com/post/1246077

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