So several nights ago on the way home from a party, I decide I'm going to stop in a bunch of bars along the way. I'm in a part of Boston I don't know very well (but will be spending more time in now due to a new job), so these are bars I haven't been to in ages, or ever.

And really this was my first attempt at sarging, in the sense of cold-approaching girls at bars and clubs. Prior to this, I've generally met people through college or mutual friends (where I have automatic social proof), or online (where I can build it up somewhat before meeting IRL). My game until recently consisted of a little natural skill and a little David D, and in hindsight, it sucked, but it was good enough to work OK in the above contexts.

Cold-approach, especially solo, is a totally different ballgame though, because social proof is more of an issue.

The bars run together a bit in my memory, but basically from midnight to 2 am I stopped in about 6-8 bars and looked around for potential targets.

In the first one, everybody was at tables and difficult to approach. One day I'll have the balls to just interrupt two girls' intimate table conversation, but not tonight. Next bar.

In the next bar, it was waaaaay too fucking crowded and loud to even talk, so I bounced.

In the third bar, I get somewhere without so much noise and crowd, and open a set of two Asian girls and a dude. "I'm just going to butt in here and talk to you guys, OK?" I say – not the best line, since I haven't really put much thought into openers yet (remember I said I've never done cold-approach sarging before?), but my delivery at least was pretty solid. One of the Asian chicks seems a tiny bit put off, but they both mumble something to the effect of, "OK...", which I fucking loved. Moral: beta people sometimes whine or roll their eyes, but they'll still let you impose your reality on the situation.

Here I ran into a funny sort of problem, which was that I wasn't terribly into the girls – they were HB7s at least, but not really my type and didn't seem fun, whereas the guy turned out to be doing an MPH, and I really love science/bio, so hearing about what he studies was actually more interesting to me than talking to the girls. So I'm talking to them a little bit, but mostly paying attention to the dude, and perhaps for that reason, the girls seem to warm up to me a bit, and are trying a little bit to get my attention. I make them laugh a couple times, but I'm still mostly talking to the dude, and after a few minutes they leave the set and go talk to their other friend. I don't feel like chasing them, and I don't see other sets I'm crazy about opening, so I bounce.

What hit me the most about that spot was how important social proof is for sarging. This is the draw of arriving with a wing or other friends, because you come across as not sketchy (if this guy was sketchy he wouldn't have friends!). When I got home, I read a bit about solo sarging (e.g. this article), and the key seems to be, basically, avoiding the perception that you're there alone by constantly being in conversation. Immediately when you show up you should open a set, or at least talk to the staff, so people don't see you standing around alone. If you leave a set or get blown out, immediately open a new one, so people don't see you standing around alone. If you're constantly talking to people, you don't seem to be alone, and you don't seem sketchy. That's my impression so far at least, based on this one experience and some reading, YMMV.

In the next bar, there's pretty much no approachable sets (M/F couples at the bar, at two-person tables, etc.), except this pair of dudes at a larger table, so I say fuck it, talk to everyone. Turns out they were pretty rad, from France, and I had a good time chatting with them over a beer before bouncing.

At this point, it's getting close to 2 am, when the bars in Boston all close (this fucking city, man), and many of them won't even let you in after 1:30, so that ended up being the last joint I was able to visit.

TL;DR: I tried sarging for the first time, by myself, and got pretty much nowhere, and realized how hard it is in situations where you don't have preexisting social proof, so now I'm pretty interested in getting wing(wo)men to work with in the future. Also, knowing what locations are the most fertile sarging grounds, at what times, seems important.

Speaking of, anybody here also in Boston? One of you emailed the Bostonians on the seddit locator a few months ago, but I have yet to hear more details on meeting up.