the tinder effect

decadearray · 2016-10-06T14:57:09+00:00

You obviously didn't go to college... it's not a fuck fest. Not everyone who goes to college just gets laid all the time. But, the cold approach is how we did it ten years ago. Its the only way to do it.

XeroMotivation · 2016-10-06T15:02:46+00:00

You're a bit delusional about how this whole thing works. Yeah, tinder is pretty popular but it's not what the "vast vast" majority use to hook up.

I have exactly 0 hookups through tinder (back when I used it) even though I match with most people. I don't find the interactions to be genuine.

For me and everyone I know, we get laid by going to the clubs. That's still primarily how it works especially among young people.

However, you are correct that social media at large has increased their "market share". It's commonly used as a tool to establish relationships with people you might be interested in but I would say that most don't just msg a girl and ask to fuck right off the bat like with tinder.

Also rofl at college being a "fuck fest for everyone". That's simply not true. It's a much a "fuck fest" as any other point in your life. What determines if you're getting laid is your game, not any arbitrary stage of your life.

TheXXL · 2016-10-06T15:07:53+00:00

One thing i've noticed recently is that tinder makes up the VAST VAST majority of peoples success with getting laid.

I would love to see your statistics for it.

Not just my friends, but even people on 'pickup forums' who you'd think would be out there cold approaching.

Whow whow whow... slow down here buddy. Don't you see the problem with your logic here? If those guys are out approaching, how can they write on a forum? Has it ever occured to you that most guys don't do approaches? It is so much easier to write a hundred mass mails to every living girl on an online dating site. Also, it is not hurtful not get a reply back, as to where a rejection in front of other people hurts most guys ego, hence they don't approach in real life.

Nearly everyone on the various pickup sites with lots of lays under their belt get them all from tinder.

They are writing on an online forum about it. First it's not always true, and second, they are mainly online people, too scared to approach a girl in real life.

Some of these field reports read as though zero 'game' was even required. ''We matched. I asked her if she was down to bang. She said 'sure'. So she came round and we started making out amlost straight away and then had sex''

That's because Tinder is a hookup site. It is well known that it's not about finding friends, or someone to talk to. It's about finding someone to fuck.

Now I know I don't have any game, but is it really that hard for people who do have game (and who aren't like in college which I assume is a fuck fest for everyone) to get consistent results with cold approach?

It is harder work, sure, takes more time, sure, and i can't say if it is more or less consistent than tinder, since i don't do well on tinder, i don't even try that much it's boring the shit out of me to swipe on "barbie dolls" only to write about boring shit until they are finally open to meet and then to find out they have zero character.

Got talking to a random guy in a bar the other night ad he said something to me which i'd never really thought about. He said ''Getting laid on nights out with randoms used to be the case but tinder/social media outsourced hooking up to online and women are more comfortable with that. It seems weird to cold approach now. Shes thinking "why isn't he just on tinder"

Wow, he must be a real capacity in social studies. What was his name? maybe he got a nobel prize for his outstanding work.

Really made me think! Extra depressing if true, because I get about 1 match per 400 swipes!!

Let me tell you a true story. Me and my best friend of 20 years now, we went out to party. He knew i was into the seduction community and wanted to try it out too. He was doing decent in online game, but he had to chat for hours and nights to get even one lay. He always bragged how dominant he was with the girls, that they came to his appartment and i quote: "when i have a girl here sitting on my couch, i will fuck her.". Sure he fucked them, i know since we share the appartment, and sometimes it was loud haha, but that point aside, i thought "cool, at last we can have some fun, pick up some chicks and he will handle the girl friends of my target.". Now here comes the truth: No matter how much he thought he was "the man" how "dominant and cool" he thought he was, i was the one to open all the sets. I was the one to make moves while he was standing there not getting a single word out of his mouth, let alone flirt with any girl.

On several occasions i helped it by making sure one of the girls was taking initiative with him, hell, once i opened a set of 5 or 6 girls, and within 1 minute one of them hugged him, started kissing him and he could not help it but talk about it for the rest of the night how she just kissed him... like a 5 year old. Needless to say he never even had the guts to escalate with any of the girls, while i was making out with my target.

Long story short: He is like those "tinder" guys who brag how they fuck any girl on there. Big badass online, and only when it comes to having a sure fuck, only if the girl says so outright. Then they don't fear rejection, since they have pretty much made a contract to fuck. In the real world though, they are scared like little boys, fearing rejection so much they piss their pants. Don't take this tinder shit too serious, see for yourself how far you can come with game in the real world. Oh and one last thing: bragging is easy, acting upon it is the thing most guys struggle with.

fullweek · 2016-10-06T19:54:47+00:00

There is so much generalization here.

Tinder is like anything else (besides being online). The only added benefit is that you both know you find each other attractive. Your profile was good enough for her to say, "I'm interested." For what? Who the fuck knows. Find out. Generalizing removes the fact that the person on the other side is a real fucking person.

With that said, if you have "game," you can get laid wherever you want. It is not "weird" to cold approach. God forbid you talk to a new person.

Does Tinder make women more comfortable? No, it's just something you do while you're taking a shit or waiting for your friend to get ready. If you say something stupid, in person or online, you will get ignored. If you talk like a normal person, surprise, you will do fine in person or online.

You can get laid at a club or on Tinder. Tinder makes it easier because you swipe, match, chat. Going to a club or any place where you physically have to meet someone new is different. But if you can talk, if you can have a conversation, it does not matter where you are.

The real effect Tinder has had is making it easier for you to "meet" women who find you attractive. It's like going to a club and having a crowd of women sitting at a table with a neon sign saying, "I'm interested in you."

tooeasilybored · 2016-10-06T15:11:16+00:00

If a girl really wants to get laid, she used to have to go out spend the night weeding through the shit before finding one guy she doesnt mind looking at. All you gotta do now is set a profile on tinder, and choose who you wana fuck.

I mean for girl it was never hard before, now its practically delivered to her door.

College is a fuck fest if you find the right girl. But for the vast majority of people...they aint getting anything those years. Which is why I always tell people during frosh week, go to all activities. When campus clubs first open, sign up for every club you are remotely interested in. I met my best friends and my ex that way. The chances of you chatting up a girl in class is very unlikely unless you look like brad pitt. No one at class wants to be there, and their moods reflect that. Oh and dont even think about bangin a girl on ya floor let along ya building. The best resident to be in, is an all male dorm in a co ed campus. Guaranteed girls in there all the damn time, and they ain't the ones that need help with calc 101.

SunDevilElite42 · 2016-10-06T15:42:08+00:00

Haha in my experience 8s 9s and 10s don't use tinder, girls who are a little less confident and not as attractive use tinder. I would much rather go to a party or bar and cold approach over using the app. At least in person I instantly know what I'm getting into vs hoping they are somewhat what their profile makes them out to be. Plus tinder favors pretty guys and if your not the best looking then in person approaching is 10X better! Play off of humor and confidence, those qualities out play looks any day.

RaazMataaz · 2016-10-06T18:13:35+00:00

I think Tinder is the standard for a lot of people but think about it, it makes the whole process so much easier. Because of that, a guy doing a cold approach will get even more respect imo (especially if he isn't on Tinder and prefers to cold approach). Women (and people in general) will always respect a man who approaches a woman he likes rather than swiping right. There isn't any replacement for it.

synxicate · 2016-10-06T14:31:34+00:00

we in the same boat my dude

lItsAutomaticl · 2016-10-06T16:10:20+00:00

My ugly friend had a decent streak on Tinder. Now he says it's shit. I tend to agree. I used to get matches sometimes, now I get none.

Overnight_Delivery · 2016-10-06T17:23:01+00:00

If this is true it's probably for the better. Now all the girls are in one place who want to hook up and you don't have to waste time trying for complete random girls. Pretty sure everyone in dance clubs are looking to hook up that night though.

You just need to frame your cold approaches as insta-tinder dates.

Letsgoouttogether · 2016-10-07T00:34:13+00:00

First of all, tinder is like 80% about looks. Whether you get matched with a girl is solely dependent on your looks for the most part.
Just try it out yourself, make a fake tinder profile, take a picture of an attractive dude. You will get about 50+ matches per day. The prettier you are, the more matches you get.
Moreover, it is true what they say. If you are an attractive guy on tinder, you can say whatever you want. She will be down meeting you and eventually hooking up.

So the way to increase your tinder matches is to fix your looks. Everyone can fix his looks. You cannot change your genetics, however you can change the way you look: ex. haircut, skin, clothes, physical features through gym etc.

Now, tinder does not influence cold approaches at all. If the right guy approaches, girls will hook up with him. Be it on tinder, be it irl. The existence of tinder does not make cold approaches harder either.
If you have 0 success on tinder and 0 success irl cold approaching, you should probably fix your looks to decrease the blowouts. Game is something that will help you throughout a set and will help you getting laid eventually, but it won't change your initial appearance. If she does not like your physical appearance, chances are, she won't even give you the chance to "game" her.

recyclablebanthas · 2016-10-07T01:33:00+00:00

One thing i've noticed recently is that tinder makes up the VAST VAST majority of peoples success with getting laid.

No offense, but what the hell are you talking about? Tinder is supplemental at BEST. Like something you run on the side and pick up a decent lead maybe once every couple of weeks or so.

Certainly not some massive majority of success.

Not just my friends, but even people on 'pickup forums' who you'd think would be out there cold approaching. Nearly everyone on the various pickup sites with lots of lays under their belt get them all from tinder.

Utter bullshit. This doesn't even pass the laugh test. How many infield videos are you ignoring with this comment alone? Let me tell you, it's a lot.

''We matched. I asked her if she was down to bang. She said 'sure'. So she came round and we started making out amlost straight away and then had sex''

Huge exaggeration. Of course if you actually get a match and actually have the balls to ask for a meet instead of trying to have a month long pen pal interaction, you're going to have a chance to meet up.

But that first meet is like an interview. Nothing's really guaranteed. You still have to see if there's chemistry.

If so, then yes..... "Banging" will probably happen pretty fast.

Now I know I don't have any game,

Then Tinder won't help you. Neither will all these mildly ridiculous overgeneralizations about Tinder being some magic pickup tool that it really isn't.

but is it really that hard for people who do have game (and who aren't like in college which I assume is a fuck fest for everyone) to get consistent results with cold approach?

First off, what the hell are you talking about?

Secondly, college isn't a fuck fest for everyone. Or 99% of people, really.

Thirdly, if you have game, it's not hard to get consistent results. Some of that could be cold approaches. Some could be various kinds of social circle game. Some could be Tinder.

Fourthly, making ridiculous overgeneralizations is probably your biggest barrier right now. You have made this out to be almost like magic. It's not.

Got talking to a random guy in a bar the other night ad he said something to me which i'd never really thought about.

Some random guy isn't proof. Stop wasting your time with this bullshit.

He said ''Getting laid on nights out with randoms used to be the case but tinder/social media outsourced hooking up to online and women are more comfortable with that. It seems weird to cold approach now. Shes thinking "why isn't he just on tinder"

Bullshit. No one is thinking this. Except this random guy. Girls are met all the time and they're not thinking there is something wrong because the guy isn't on Tinder.

A lot of people are actually kind of sick of Tinder.

In any case, the dating world hasn't changed over night. Tinder is just one more way people meet. It's not some new standard.

leprogrammist · 2016-10-07T12:20:40+00:00

Man, nothing feels like a cold approach working out. That is like a hole in one. On Tinder et.al. you have the horny girls sitting at home inviting someone over to fuck. "0" game required as you mentioned. Tinder makes rejections easier. But it is fastfood. Respect to all guys doing cold approaches. IMHO you don't grow as a man using one these apps. Approaching random people that takes balls. And you get to know people. You are not so easily rejected as just being ignored.

fuckmefuckmefuckmef · 2016-10-06T22:38:07+00:00

"I get about 1 match per 400 swipes!!"

I´m guessing you have totally normal and boring pics of yourself looking at the camera. My main pic is me barechested holding 4 bottles of liquor. I´m not ripped at all, I´m skinny. I´d say I was average looking. I get shit lots of matches, they don´t give a fuck if I´m ripped or not (except for a very few shallow ones). What they give a fuck about is me not giving a fuck about how I look, instead I look like a guy who can lay back and have fun.

But it´s just a guess.

Edit: I forgot to put the quote at the top cause I´m stoned AF

SunTzu111 · 2016-10-06T17:00:03+00:00

Use fake photos, I'm dead serious, find some jacked up guy on the beach wearing a hat, and use that as the first photo

Unless your jacked up yourself, then use an actual photos obviously

Title	the tinder effect
Author	pathe1
Upvotes	18
Comments	44
Date	October 6, 2016 2:20 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/565lii/the_tinder_effect/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/the-tinder-effect.1413511 https://theredarchive.com/post/1413511

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