Imagine you're told that in 10 years, you'll have a life-threatening disease - let's say a tumor in your brain. It’s a condition so rare and complex that operating on it is incredibly difficult. You have the power to choose a doctor to perform the surgery, but you only get one chance. One surgery. And if you pick the wrong doctor, you’ll die. Now, here’s the catch: you can’t pick a doctor who already exists. You have to choose someone currently studying to become a doctor - a university student. In 10 years, this person will operate on you, and you have just one shot at making the right decision. How would you approach this problem? My guess is that, in a situation like that, you’d research extensively. You’d study medicine, learn about what makes a great doctor, and talk to different experts. You’d interview numerous doctors, gaining firsthand experience from these interactions. After talking to 20, 30, or 50 people, you’d choose the one person you trust with your life.

Now, let’s apply that same thought process to choosing a spouse - a long-term partner. Most men consider this one of the most important decisions in life. If you pick the wrong spouse, your life can become miserable. So, let’s contrast this with the way most men actually make this decision.

And how do most men choose their lifelong partner? Are they going out and developing extensive analysis? Are they dating multiple women to see what they truly enjoy? No.

What most men do is date someone from their university, their workplace, or their immediate social circle, and they often marry the first person who, quite frankly, says yes to them. That’s how most men make this decision. Then they justify it by saying, “Oh, you know, my wife is the best,” but deep down, do they really think that?

If this is such an important decision, how can they approach it with such carelessness? Most don’t question their choice. When they marry someone, they rationalize, “Yeah, she’s the best, she’s the smartest.” But is she? Is she really the best for YOU? Out of the 4 billion women in the world, you pick this one person. What was your sample size? How did you even know who to pick?

Did you develop an understanding of what kind of women you like or dislike? How many women did you date? How many did you sleep with? If you’ve only been with a few, how do you know what you truly want?

The truth is, even though this is one of the most important decisions in a man’s life, they often leave it up to chance. They either stay lonely and single or, worse, they get chosen. Most men don’t pick - they get picked. It’s as simple as that. A girl says yes, and that becomes the choice.

Imagine a doctor about to operate on your brain. You don’t get to pick. The first doctor shows up, and you say yes because they’re the only one willing to take on the task. That’s how most men approach marriage. They just accept the first person who says yes, and then wonder why they’re unhappy or feel trapped.

Do you want to live your life like that? Do you want to leave the most important decision to chance? If not, you must seriously improve your abilities to attract women - to get them to want to date you in order to get more options to choose from. If you don’t, you only have yourself to blame for a poor marriage.