Men were more lonely but now articles say women are more lonely. Why the change?

1bnna2bnna3bnna · 2025-04-06T08:20:48+00:00

I think loneliness surveys and related discussions, if not mythodologicaly comparable are unhelpful. If it is framed as having no one to call in an emergency, versus someone you are close to, versus a network you can rely on or access to intimate relationships of various kinds - you get different results by gender. My suspicion is a greater proportion of men have literally no one at all and have less acess to intimate relationships.

TheRealMasonMac · 2025-04-06T03:30:37+00:00

https://pure.manchester.ac.uk/ws/portalfiles/portal/135977571/EJP_Gender_Postprint_AAM.pdf

Meta-analysis of studies on gender differences on loneliness over the past few decades concluded that male and female loneliness rates were very similar. I would interpret that as 50-50. I would also generally caution against comparing results from different studies unless you find that they used methodologies designed to be compared with other studies -- and even then, you need to check that they are actually comparable like this meta-analysis did.

Local-Willingness784 · 2025-04-06T14:37:06+00:00

I don't have the time to do a deep dive on this, but the last time I looked most of the "loneliness" data was basically self-reported subjective experience.

Which, to a large extend... Fair enough. Thats mostly what loneliness means.

The thing I can't quite reconcile is that all the real measurable indicators of loneliness are substantially different for men and women.

Like, if you measure the number and quality of friends or their social Network, my understanding is that men on average are much more likely to have a smaller or non-existent one.

That seems extremely relevant. Either men genuinely need fewer friends to not feel lonely, or men and women just describe their sense of loneliness differently, despite one being much more acute than the other.

Initial_Zebra100 · 2025-04-06T07:04:57+00:00

It's interesting.

I do wonder, women can sometimes have way more friendships, is their definition different? Like a woman with say disconnected friends feeling alone?

The change might be multiple reasons. Society is increasingly promoting the value of independence. Of never settling. Of bring ok by yourself. Especially to women.

Except for long periods, people lived in connected groups. We knew each others business. We knew our neighbours, we didn't have phones. Society wasn't perfect then, but I think it had different problems. People can struggle to make friends of any gender.

Social media gives the illusion of connection. And the disillusionment of unlimited choice.

gratis_eekhoorn · 2025-04-06T05:05:00+00:00

Whatever suits the narrative for demonizing men at that point.

dr-korbo · 2025-04-06T11:09:20+00:00

Loneliness is often studied as a feeling. It doesn't matter if men have less relationship than women. If women and men report the same feeling of loneliness then it's assumed the situation is the same. Men are used to not complain when they suffer.

The-Author · 2025-04-06T16:53:37+00:00

I think it depends on how you choose to measure loneliness.

The survey you linked was a self report where they asked people to identify how lonely they felt. Also said study was from December 2021, during or just after the pandemic, so it might not be entirely representative of how lonely people feel now where things are more "normal".

Another way that a lot of other studies use is to measure loneliness is to ask how many friends a person has, how many people could you call for help in an emergency or how many emotionally intimate relationships a person has.

There are quite a lot of studies that show that men tend to have a lot less emotionally fulfilling and emotionally intimate relationships than women. I feel like this has something to do with how men are socialized to avoid emotional vulnerability and openness with other men and that such things are only acceptable with women, and even then only sometimes.

Also I think I agree with your claim that loneliness does affect men more, I think it's just been more normalized than it is with women. Actually now that I think about it romanticized might be a better word seeing as how a lot of our culture and media tends to glorify the lone wolf badass that doesn't need or rely on anyone. So even a lot of men say they don't feel lonely, I wouldn't be so sure that said men are necessarily "okay".

Source: https://health.clevelandclinic.org/male-friendship&ved=2ahUKEwiPlOfg7MOMAxXiVKQEHWknILMQ-tANegQILhAV&usg=AOvVaw04iN7F7TzVwVJBIQE7qFQp

Source: https://www.latimes.com/lifestyle/newsletter/2023-10-10/more-than-1-in-7-men-have-no-close-friends-the-way-we-socialize-boys-is-to-blame-group-therapy

CoachDT · 2025-04-06T05:05:02+00:00

There isn't a huge change. I keep screaming this from the rooftops, men and women are both going through a crisis of loneliness.

The "male loneliness epidemic" initially came about because a "doctor" on tiktok wanted to tell men to do better for the sake of validation. When it first came up it was used as a tool to bludgeon men and belittle them.

Now it's being taken more seriously. But in general people are lonely. It's tough out there.

austin101123 · 2025-04-06T02:58:55+00:00

It's possible you know more lonely men than lonely women because the lonely women are less likely to know you than lonely men.

Sure-Vermicelli4369 · 2025-04-06T14:43:02+00:00

This whole "male loneliness epidemic" is a shoddy attempt to pay lip service to men after decades of focusing on every other group

Langland88 · 2025-04-06T23:24:09+00:00

I'm not sure why it's changed but I feel like it might have ulterior motives. I think the fact that Trump won his election by a landslide has prompted some of this. A lot of journalists and government officials were very upset with the results along with a lot of people on social media. So as they looked for reasons, the male loneliness epidemic was brought up several times. At first it was easy, before the election, to dismiss it. But then as people started to investigate, I think they found a lot of validity to the issue but because it painted men as the primary victims and women now as the oppressors(in an indirect sort of way), it was an inconvenient truth.

So now I believe this is some sort of way to try to downplay the issue that men are facing a loneliness crisis. Honestly, I just wish we could just approach this issue neutrally. I say this because if both men and women are facing loneliness, then maybe we need to address it as a loneliness issue and give both men and women the same equal treatment for it. It might be different solutions but still equal in that would help both men and women out. This is just my opinion. I know it's wishful thinking but I still felt like addressing my thoughts on this.

FatReverend · 2025-04-07T02:04:52+00:00

Because people cant stand it when men are more anything so they have to "correct" the narrative.

CluelessThinker · 2025-04-08T00:23:33+00:00

We're in a loneliness epidemic worldwide in developed countries.

This is due to the loss of 3rd places

Overworking due to low wages and inflation

Social media filling the void and increasing standards to unreasonable levels

Hikikomori and NEETs rising in numbers

Lower birthrates due to a lack of financial and future security. This seems to be a common trend in developed countries which means there are less people to have relationships with

Dating apps that exploit their customers

Misinformation campaigns that cause many reasonable people to become extremists which alienates loved ones

Bigotry that seems to be rising this includes misandry and misogyny

Covid which seems to have ruined people's social skills and politeness most likely a response to the trauma of that event

Parents who no longer let their kids have free reign over the neighborhood and instead schedule playdates or have inside time

And probably many more factors.

Dazzling_Shoulder_69 · 2025-04-06T10:38:54+00:00

Feminism is a very powerful organization. Feminism has infested everything. The articles you read were probably changed by feminists .

Feminism is a hate movement against men .

GodlessPerson · 2025-04-06T10:49:22+00:00

Both men and women are lonely at similar rates. Despite some propaganda or some misapplied personal experiences, you can't actually replace intimate relationships with friendships. That means that, in a majority monogamous straight society, men and women will crave what they don't have at similar rates. Sure, friendship is better than nothing but men's friendships, despite usually being smaller, are not of worse quality than women's friendships despite some major feminist propaganda stating otherwise.

Local-Willingness784 · 2025-04-06T18:29:07+00:00

i don't get how it would be a male loneliness epidemic if most women are straight. if most guys aren't dating, wouldn't that be the same for women?

Alternative_Poem445 · 2025-04-07T18:29:29+00:00

the isolation epidemic effects everyone of all walks of life

BhryaenDagger · 2025-04-09T02:34:17+00:00

That stat is not showing that women are winning the loneliness Olympics. It’s showing that men and women are nearly equally lonely. That’s what should give people pause: that divisiveness in society has had a noticeable impact.

Fuzzy_Department2799 · 2025-04-07T19:17:39+00:00

There are lots of reasons but it boils down to one simple fact. More money to be made off of women. You will generate thousands of more clicks by framing it as a problem for women that needs to be addressed.

FindingNuance · 2025-04-09T17:34:38+00:00

The issue with this kind of data is that it's never of all or even most people. It's not 57% of men and 59% of women. It's 57% the men they surveyed and 59% of the women they surveyed. I checked the source, they surveyed 2,496 people in the US in 2021. That's 0.00000752% of the US population in 2021. Are we sure it properly represents the entire population?

ChimpPimp20 · 2025-04-10T18:44:15+00:00

In retrospect every demo is lonely. It's harder to hang out with people when activities cost more than they use to. I just think that the whole "oh, I'm more lonely than you are" takes are unnecessary because it's counterproductive. If we can fix the economy then we can help with the loneliness.

BloomingBrains · 2025-05-10T05:58:29+00:00

Men are conditioned to be less open about their emotions, especially in a climate where saying you feel lonely is like saying "I'm an incel who thinks he is entitled to women's bodies" in most people's eyes. So naturally less are going to admit it compared to the actual number.

That said I do understand why plenty of women would also be unsatisfied with the current paradigm. They're pressured to practice hookup culture, hypergamy, ignore sensitive men, and pursue "traditional" aggressive, brutish men.

Saying "women are also lonely" is therefore valid, as I'm sure many are. But the likely motivation behind saying so is the problem. They clearly just want to cover up the male loneliness epidemic by saying women are more affected. They already do that with literally every other issue.

eternal_ttorment · 2025-04-08T09:34:54+00:00

I mean... Seeing what's around you is anecdotal evidence, and statistics always depend on the sample. That means country, age, tax bracket etc. Tho a difference of 2% is so low, the result is basically equal, even if there was no margin of error. It still means that practically, almost 2/3 of the surveyed people feel lonely, which is brutal.

Ultimately I don't think those digits matter. Whether more or less women or men are lonely, it still doesn't make the individual men or women less lonely.

Curious_Jury_5181 · 2025-04-27T10:02:58+00:00

I don't like the way the loneliness conversation has been weaponised in the gender war

Based on what I've gathered, Loneliness seems to be an issue accross the board, especially for Millenials and Genzs

It's just a byproduct of the internet and the rest of modern world we live in. These circumstances atomising and segmenting us more as time goes on.

MGTOWs were in denial about this and now online women spaces seem to be taking a similar shape with things like the 4B movement.

aleuslucasmalocus · 2025-06-02T23:37:39+00:00

Shiiit I hope so

LatestLTU · 2025-12-16T14:35:48+00:00

Men are better at being solo, and can find companionship in online gaming.

Women are biologically more gregarious and social creatures, more concerned with enforcing social rules (hence why it's mostly white liberal women driving cancel culture) and worse at enjoying their own company. And most women still aren't interested in gaming. But women want to be around men, so if men don't go out women get lonely.

PangolinRude2029 · 2026-02-22T14:59:57+00:00

The only time anyone gives a shit, or it becomes addressed, is when it starts to affect women. Which it finally is. Men don't want a "boss bitch.". Peace is better than constant conflict and who brings more to the table w/women.

If you are a man and you DO bring more to the table, you're toxically competitive or toxically masculine, and the main problem of society since women want equal pay. And if you don't, they aren't interested because you're a low wages loser. So it's a damned if you do, damned if you don't situation. An impossible paradox. The only way to "win" is to not play.

Quarto6 · 2025-04-10T19:19:31+00:00

Why should being a responsible parent get you a pat on the back?

Title	Men were more lonely but now articles say women are more lonely. Why the change?
Author	Natural_Ball5453
Upvotes	139
Comments	54
Date	April 5, 2025 3:21 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/comments/1js5u3k/men_were_more_lonely_but_now_articles_say_women/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/LeftWingMaleAdvocates/men-were-more-lonely-but-now-articles-say-women.1548718 https://theredarchive.com/post/1548718

Comments