Hobby groups are really the last good place to date

NotUsedUsernameYet · 2025-08-31T02:13:11+00:00

If hobby group is stable, you have a chance to hit on one woman max. Nobody wants to be the second option in the group.

Also, if you go there solely to meet women it’s clearly obvious and super creepy.

WebNew9978 · 2025-08-31T02:13:15+00:00

There really isn’t a good place to date nowadays. Women really don’t want to be approached anymore nowadays. They want just to enjoy their time there. If you’re gonna go to a hobby group, you’ll have to become friends with them and then you hope their friends is someone that’ll be interested in you. If not, then you hope the friends who are friends with your hobby group friends has a friend who’d be interested in you. And if not, then the cycle continues.

jazzmaster1992 · 2025-08-31T02:20:08+00:00

I think one issue when we talk about dating is that far too many people don't really go through more than a few partners at most before settling down. "Dating" is a broad term that can mean anything from having a chat over coffee with multiple people to hooking up etc...and I suspect many people don't do this kind of serial dating thing, asking people out all the time and constantly meeting new prospective partners. If you go to any one place to "meet people" and it's not a singles event, there is a good chance many of them are already partnered up.

If you talk to somebody who met their spouse in a hobby group of course that's the advice they give because that's how they met. It doesn't mean it's good advice. It's something to try but not sufficient on its own.

I don't think you can just put your eggs in one basket; if you're not doing hobby groups and growing your social network and talking to strangers on nights out and have an online dating profile, you're probably not doing enough to make yourself not single. There's not one magical place where all the single people who are compatible with you exist. It sucks to hear because many folks rely on just their OLD profile and immediate social circle and that's why they stay single for so long, even though the idea of putting in so much effort is exhausting or even intimidating. Many people aren't really socialized IMO to deal with the levels of rejection and effort to find a partner with consistent effort, either because they give up, or they found someone early enough in life that they didn't need to put actual effort into the process of meeting partners alone.

RelevantEscape4535 · 2025-08-31T02:28:12+00:00

The only places that are actually good for dating are the ones where you have a decent number of chances to shoot your shot. Hobby groups are too passive for that. You’ll be labeled a creep very easily. Only way it could work is if you’re attractive and women are frequently throwing obvious signals at you.

JadeGrapes · 2025-08-31T02:46:46+00:00

Haven't been an actor in a Renaissance faire huh?

Soft-Neat8117 · 2025-08-31T02:00:39+00:00

That is assuming that your hobbies aren't shared almost entirely by your own gender.

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Qu3stion_R3ality1750 · 2025-08-31T02:37:44+00:00

Buddy, I promise if you start a new hobby with the sole intention of meeting a woman or a partner in general...women pick up on shit like that pretty quickly. You aren't going to have nearly as much of a successful endeavor as you think. Like another user pointed out, you've got about 1-2 women max to shoot your shot with before you're suddenly the guy everyone groans at when you enter the room.

And it's foolish to hope and wait for any potential friend you make at said hobby group to set you up with someone. Not only do I have my own set of issues with being 'set up' except with someone who I KNOW knows my wants and need, but it's just waiting around for disappointment.

Hobby groups just aren't the way to go, either. I'd probably hit on a woman at a bar WAY before I'd try to go to any hobby group to meet women. I reckon none of those women there are there to meet men; they're there because they like the hobby and may want to engage with it and meet interesting people. Women have a trillion options to pick from if they do want to meet a man.

Superb-Foundations · 2025-08-31T02:12:54+00:00

I think if he got ghosted by multiple women, he should look introspectively at the common denominator.

rejected-again · 2025-08-31T04:53:44+00:00

It makes me wonder if people just regurgitate stuff they read online rather than actually putting it into practice in real life. I mean have you ever heard of someone who met their partner through a hobby group? Because I haven't. Usually, it's through school, work, mutual friends, etc.

If you think about it, hobby groups are a terrible place to date. If you join a group, usually the members already have a familiarity with each other and there are dynamics within the group going on. How do you think it's going to go if it becomes known that some creeper joined the group not because he shares their hobby, but because he's a horndog looking to score some pussy?

At least if you approach someone at the store and get rejected, you can slink away and never see the person again. You can't really do that within a hobby group. They'll know who you are and that's the reputation you're going to have.

Logos1789 · 2025-08-31T05:04:16+00:00

Maybe if you’re the more desirable single person there. Why would they choose someone who’s merely “hobby hot” or “work hot” over literally everyone they could find online or elsewhere?

krackedy · 2025-08-31T01:59:55+00:00

I think bars still have potential.

I go sometimes and while I'm not looking for anything I do often end up having friendly conversations with women while smoking outside. If I was interested I could pretty easily flirt.

Title	Hobby groups are really the last good place to date
Author	Beautiful-Swan4836
Upvotes	8
Comments	35
Date	August 31, 2025 1:56 AM UTC (10 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1n4ipjy/hobby_groups_are_really_the_last_good_place_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/hobby-groups-are-really-the-last-good-place-to.1560924 https://theredarchive.com/post/1560924

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