Talking to a guy that was iffy on hinge. Immediately realized why I was supposed to STAY OFF dating apps in the first place.

_tinyimp · 2020-08-19T18:51:03+00:00

Weirdo. I hate fake deep guys who do drugs twice and think they’ve cured the world of injustice

LieberAal · 2020-08-19T19:35:36+00:00

Ewwwwwwww. They are always so cheesy!

"I know what you are talking about, I've been there" ... they think fake gravitas like that makes girls swoon when it actually is cringey as fuck.

My ex-fwb of three months, who was a complete and utter POS, used to do the same for literally completely benign things. He had told me early on in very offensive terms that he didn't deem me worthy enough for girlfriend-material, but when I answered "fine with me, I only want a fwb situation" he quickly scrambled in pathetic and second-hand embarrassing ways to make me fall in love with him, because that's what his poor narc soul craved.

One of his pathetic tactics was to insert himself into my problems. Jokes on him, I didn't disclose much of my actual trauma to him and always was cheerful around him. He even started asking me about any trauma and what I was currently struggling with, because he was digging for ways to make me feel fake-attached to him. But I just shrugged and told him with a bright smile that I was pretty happy. So he latched onto the most laughable mundane things.

One time my internet didn't work for a few days and I was super frustrated with the customer service from the provider and mentioned it to him. I ranted about the internet company for a bit, then got annoyed with the topic myself and said something like "Anyway, sorry, didn't mean to bore another person with my internet problems" and he interjected full of pathos and said "NO! Not *your* problems, *OUR* problems".

You could so tell he would have preferred to use that line right after I had declared some serious trauma to him, but since that didn't happen, even the mildest annoyance in my life had to do.

An awkward pause ensued because he expected me to burst into tears and declare my undying love to him or sth like, while I just looked at him confused and said anticlimactically "Huh? What? Why is my internet in my flat your problem?" ... he gave me a spiel of "Because you are part of my life now, a really important part", which again fell totally flat because he was an utter asshole towards me at other times and our whole situation was firmly established to be fwb only, because according to himself HE needed to keep his options open as I wasn't hot enough (also I didn't find his LVM ways attractive enough for a relationship, duh). So I just shrugged and got up from the couch to get a glass of water and while I stand by the sink HE COMES UP BEHIND ME, HUGS ME TIGHTLY FROM BEHIND AND SAYS "We'll get through that together, I'm always there for you".

I burst out laughing and got into a coughing fit because I had just taken a sip of water at the same time. I was like "WTF this internet situation isn't cancer" and you could tell he got so frustrated that I obviously didn't care and wasn't hopelessly in love with him. He quickly left and told me he "needed to think about some things" and I was like "Ok, bye!" enraging him even further lol.

Pasdepromesses · 2020-08-19T18:29:47+00:00

Please don’t disclose trauma or emotions like this. You’re giving them ammunition.

Lavender_flow · 2020-08-19T18:48:26+00:00

as soon as he starts as he did in picture 1. Delete, block, move on. You are wasting your time and energy on a guy like this. You are also giving him waaaaaaaaaay too much personal information so early. Also when someone types "u" it just shows me they are extremely immature.

Alma00019 · 2020-08-19T19:32:44+00:00

If only I had the confidence of a mediocre man.

LieberAal · 2020-08-19T20:31:52+00:00

I will never again participate in bullshit text conversations with OLD strangers who want to fuck me.

I’d rather go down to my local dive tavern on crowded night deep into the wee hours and masturbate on top of the bar, taking phone numbers of those who seem interested in my performance and then try to work all that into a meaningful relationship.

I’m over justifying iffy shit to “fix” being single.

whenthecagedbirdsing · 2020-08-19T19:25:04+00:00

🚩 block n delete. You already know what to do hon.

chateauduchat · 2020-08-19T20:12:47+00:00

Another plain reason that men don’t really understand the trauma endured by women from being abuse victims isn’t just something that you can simply meditate or smoke away.

Much of undoing the trauma takes conscious, active effort. Emotionally immature men think that it’s something is as easy as blocking and lighting a blunt. If that were the case, my goodness, men probably wouldn’t be out terrorizing women, moving on to the next woman just to fling all his problems at, repeating the cycle—and instead sitting in their therapist’s chair.

2020-08-19T18:43:29+00:00

You have been mansplained What an arrogant know it all weirdo! Hope you blocked him after that?

420snailmode · 2020-08-19T21:08:30+00:00

Omg the audacity to mansplain dealing with trauma to you. You didn’t even ask...literally you just made a light hearted joke and he took it as an opportunity to act like he’s deeper + smarter than you. I canttt these scrotes get worse n worse everyday

Shaakie · 2020-08-20T00:35:41+00:00

Lol, what kind of trash is this? Negging and mansplaining in a few sentences... i would've cut the conversation at screenshot 2. Fucking yikes, seriously.

These are the kind of men you see crying on different man/dating subs because they get no matches lol

Title	Talking to a guy that was iffy on hinge. Immediately realized why I was supposed to STAY OFF dating apps in the first place.
Author	ratbaby
Upvotes	73
Comments	26
Date	August 19, 2020 6:17 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/ict3vb/talking_to_a_guy_that_was_iffy_on_hinge/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/talking-to-a-guy-that-was-iffy-on-hinge.167638 https://theredarchive.com/post/167638

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