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Dread and Attraction issues.

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September 20, 2018
12 upvotes

39 yo. 5'10" 205lbs 17%bf Bp 270, DL470, Squat 365. Side bar completed ad nauseum. I participated in Hunter's first 31DTM via Twitter. At DL 10.

I'm the guy that comes here for the information without providing much value other than the occasional obvious shit post comment. I'm a leach and you guys deserve better for the effort you put in. Honestly, I never really feel like I have much value to add. I've come to the place we are all trying to get to, and in the process I've found myself and lost over 100lbs. Everything I hoped to gain from this process has been achieved and then some. When Rollo suggests that women desire and fear a man that knows his value, he is speaking to me in this moment. I have found my peace and I know my value. When Rollo taught me that desire is not negotiable, he is speaking to me now, only ironically. Here's my problem, my wife is trying so hard to win back my favor and regain my trust. She means it, I know she does. She has made herself available to me in ways I never understood she was capable, in all facets of our marriage. Only, my desire for her has decreased significantly. I want to find her desirable, but the years have fogged my glasses and I can't see my wife for the field.

I was a "nice guy" for ten years. I white knighted her while she completed post graduate studies and internships, being the emotional tampon. She treated me like absolute shit for it, and I resented my covert contracts. For a long time. Fast forward... We have two kids, she's on board with the marriage and I feel a confidence about myself like I've never had, only not about my marriage. I have let the past go, and I am looking forward. My Map is in tact. What I want is to find my wife attractive and have the family that I want, intact. I'm starting to feel that I may not get both.

What has been the experience of others that have arrived to this point concerning a waning attraction for your spouse?

or

Do the glasses eventually unfog and I should give this time for desire to rebuild?


Post Information
Title Dread and Attraction issues.
Author DeplorableRay
Upvotes 12
Comments 70
Date 20 September 2018 01:29 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/204004
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/9hb26p/dread_and_attraction_issues/
Similar Posts

Red Pill terms found in post:
MAPRollodread game
Comments

[–]simbarlionRed Beret11 points12 points  (5 children) | Copy

Do the glasses eventually unfog and I should give this time for desire to rebuild?

You're probably still slightly angry. Especially with new found abundance.

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 6 points7 points  (4 children) | Copy

You want to feel like you’re over it, but every once in a while I’m triggered. You may be right.

[–]simbarlionRed Beret7 points8 points  (0 children) | Copy

I still get angry.... At myself for time lost, and at her...well for her being a woman my bluepill self didn't understand ( also anger at self).

[–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm only starting here...

And already I'm struggling with this.

I knew the road would be long.

[–]hystericalbonding2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

If you're deplorableray on twitter as well, then you've got the same dopamine issues as every other addict. Makes it difficult to be attracted to your wife.

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children) | Copy

That's not me.

[–]johneyapocalypseThe one that says "Bad Motherfucker"6 points7 points  (1 child) | Copy

I spent time not feeling attracted to my wife. It past.

I never had oneitis for her.

She is hot and has a body to die for but for a while I was attracted to every woman except her.

Your wife being "easy" and over-accomodating likely isn't helping.

Is she fat?

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

This. Her being easy. She doesn’t have a lot of seduction tools in her toolbox.

[–]suprathepeg7 points8 points  (26 children) | Copy

I’m in a similar place myself. You’re further along than I am strength wise but I totally get your struggle.

My wife is physically a 7, for her age (40 in a couple months) probably a 9.

Lately I’m struggling with not being at all attracted to her. It’s definitely a mental thing. I’m not angry with her anymore, i just have no respect for her. I think this might be what’s bothering you too. When you realize that it’s all on you you also see that she’s been hanging around despite you being a beta bitch. You realize her real reason for being in the relationship has been transactional and you’ve been paying one way or another for this person to just exist close enough that you don’t feel lonely.

I always craved partnership. I was always frustrated that I didn’t get it. Now I’m unwilling to accept a marriage without it.

What keeps me in the game is that “stay plan = go plan”. That’s the number one thing that I’ve learned here that’s kept me on track with weight loss, working hard, and reading.

Marriage 1.0 is dead in our world, marriage 2.0 is really whatever you want to make it but because there is no 1.0 structure to fall back on it’s pretty challenging.

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 2 points3 points  (24 children) | Copy

All of this. I believe it’s mental also. Marriage 2.0, it’s got a name, but it doesn’t have a meaning.

[–]weakandsensitive11 points12 points  (23 children) | Copy

https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/45v64p/the_trope_of_the_beta_male_married_husband/

You and /u/suprathepeg read that post. That's written exactly for guys like you. You guys got treated exactly the way you deserved to be treated. Keep being salty fucks if you want, but at least own the fact that you guys got some sandy vags.

You guys intellectually get it, but your egos won't let you internalize it and absorb the implications of that post. Nobody is attracted to a fat, useless fuck. Nobody.

You want to hate your wife? Feel more than free to. But hate her for the present, don't hate her for the past. That's fucking stupid because you're responsible for that past.

[–]suprathepeg6 points7 points  (9 children) | Copy

I upvoted this cause it’s so true.

I was thinking more about this. I don’t hate her for the past.

I think as you begin to unfurl yourself you start to evaluate the metrics of your relationship. You start to see things clearly and where you would have passed a fault before you see it clearly. That clarity makes what once seemed worthy of pursuit less attractive.

I said before “stay plan = go plan” and it’s my mantra. I’m staying because either way I need to work on me. Maybe once I’ve worked out my shit enough I’ll find a great marriage here, maybe I won’t but ultimately nothing is lost.

[–]weakandsensitive11 points12 points  (7 children) | Copy

Mental point of origin is fucked, because you say

I don’t hate her for the past.

But everything you dislike about her is completely 100% rooted in the past. You can't see through your own bullshit you're so thick in it.

i just have no respect for her. [...] You realize her real reason for being in the relationship has been transactional and you’ve been paying one way or another for this person to just exist close enough that you don’t feel lonely.

When you realize that it’s all on you you also see that she’s been hanging around despite you being a beta bitch

Your rational isn't rooted into personal ownership. The way you frame it shifts the blame onto your wife. All of this is your own fucking self-hate, and you're taking the least charitable line of rational possible to protect your ego.

Just as possible

  1. She believed in love.
  2. She tried to make the best of a situation she was dealt.
  3. She has a sense of loyalty and respect even to a loser because she made a commitment.

Etc. Who knows? It doesn't really matter. What matters is you hate her because she reminds you of you. That's a fucked up reason to hate another person. Perfectly valid, of course, but completely fucked up. You are not your own mental point of origin.

Had your paragraph and rational consisted exclusively of

I always craved partnership. I was always frustrated that I didn’t get it. Now I’m unwilling to accept a marriage without it.

It'd be a whole different story. It'd be completely ownership - and you would be alleviated of fault. But it wasn't. That statement would look like this -

I was a fucking loser. I wasn't the type of guy who was attractive, who deserved that companionship because I was a loser. [I hate this bitch because she reminds me of my past, and I'm getting rid of her.]/[It isn't her fault. I'm going to put in a solid effort and give her a chance to respond properly.]

But your statement doesn't take any responsibility. You're salty at her, because YOU were a bitch. That's just frankly rude. Give her a fair shake or don't, but don't go around pretending you are when you aren't because your ego can't deal with the butthurt.

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

But everything you dislike about her is completely 100% rooted in the past. You can't see through your own bullshit you're so thick in it.

Thanks. I think you nailed it.

[–]RedPill-BlackLotusRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I really needed to read that. Thanks for typing all that shit out.

[–]suprathepeg1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Thx I need to consider this.

[–]suprathepeg1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

Let say your right and I need to give her time. How do I break through this mental block and regain my desire before I burn it down?

I fully get that I wasn’t worth being with in the past. But now that I’m building my frame and I know my SMV etc is higher that has changed. I’m not saying I’m totally there now and no more work is required, in fact I know I need to do more. I realize I need to work on gaming her, flirting, fucking her good etc. Fact remains I still have a mental block to get over. Do I fuck her just to build my on skill?

[–]weakandsensitive2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

You don't have to do jack. I'm just saying you should stop bullshitting yourself.

[–]suprathepeg1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

I appreciate the reality check. I think if I’m gonna lead I need to do something tho.

Stay plan = go plan.

[–]weakandsensitive3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

The only thing you need to do is get rid of that ego defense mechanism so you can assess situations honestly. Like I said, right now you're so deep in bullshit you can't see clearly at all. You're pushing blame where it doesn't belong and making excuses for all sorts of crap instead of taking ownership

"Stay plan = go plan" is a cute phrase and all, but it's useless if you aren't separating the wheat from the chaff in the preparation and execution.

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Again, I'll second this.

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Fuck it. Maybe you're right. I might still hold contempt for the past.

I've read that post sometime ago. It was written for me. I would like to think I've owned it, but none of these epiphanies are binary. I find myself understanding some of these concepts deeper as I see the bigger picture. I don't hate my wife, it's actually quite the opposite. I see the value she adds in so many areas of my life. However, coming around to desiring her sexually, has not so easy for me.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Who the fuck finds a 220# woman who can barely wipe her own ass properly attractive?

Who the fuck finds a 300# man who can barely wipe his own ass properly attractive?

Put your fat wife on Keto. Destroy the kitchen. Dont ask. Just do it.

Either she looses 70# of you start fucking chicks on the side

You let her get this gross. Help her to fix it more overtly.

[–]weakandsensitive2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

desiring her sexually, has not so easy for me.

Well no shit if she's a tub of lard. That's not a value judgment, that's just biology.

It's the same reason why, irrespective of the age of the man, woman between 20 and 24 are always rated the sexiest.

[–]BostonBrakeJob1 point2 points  (9 children) | Copy

"...deserve to be cheated on..."

Is this just something we tell men here to mindfuck them into OYS? Or do you really believe this?

Same for "the oldest teenager in the house". A good trick we tell ourselves in the beginning so we can quit taking their bs so seriously/personally.

But there's a reason men here will say they'll file papers if they ever get cheated on. Don't hear any saying "I mean, if she cheats I guess I deserved it one way or another/it was just her lizard brain. No biggy, she can stay." That reason is, we understand how they think and rationalize...but that doesn't excuse their shitty decision making. We just have the balls/self respect to hold them accountable.

I get what you're telling OP, just to be clear. This is a side discussion, not a counterpoint.

[–]hack3geRed Beret1 point2 points  (4 children) | Copy

But there's a reason men here will say they'll file papers if they ever get cheated on. Don't hear any saying "I mean, if she cheats I guess I deserved it one way or another/it was just her lizard brain. No biggy, she can stay." That reason is, we understand how they think and rationalize...but that doesn't excuse their shitty decision making. We just have the balls/self respect to hold them accountable.

I get what you're telling OP, just to be clear. This is a side discussion, not a counterpoint.

I have enough red flags to believe my wife cheated on me at some point during my BP days and its taken me a while to internalize that I got what I deserved if she did. There's a good Jack10 post on it that helped me work through it.

Now if she cheats on the RP me or I even think there's inappropriate shit going on then she gets paper's without even a discussion as I don't have time for that drama in my life. It would be met with a "meh, turns over" and I'd replace her with two half her age in a fortnight.

Maybe that is me hamstering the past but it works for me.

[–]BostonBrakeJob0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

Now if she cheats on the RP me or I even think there's inappropriate shit going on then she gets paper's without even a discussion as I don't have time for that drama in my life. It would be met with a "meh, turns over" and I'd replace her with two half her age in a fortnight.

What I'm talking about is all sematics, really. But what you said here is basically saying that you'll hold her accountable for her actions, via your own actions of filing and moving on with your life. It's a solid gold mindsight, full of self respect and abundance.

Whether men believe they "deserved" it, or "should've expected" it, is irrelevant, so long as they end up with the mindset you (and most others here) have now, IMO. I'm just a sucker for general discussion on human behavior/psychology, even if it is semantics.

[–]hack3geRed Beret1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

As I thought more about it I do find it interesting - there's really 3 ways you can react to your BP past: being angry, playing the victim and owning your shit. It's interesting to think about what type of messaging helps get a man to #3 and away from #1 & #2 or if there really is anyway to help someone get there and they just have to get there on their own.

I'd argue until you understand why it happened (hypergamy, AWALT, etc.) and what your part in it was (you were a fat, lazy piece of worthless shit) you can't be secure or confident enough in yourself to know that it won't go down the same way the second time around and that is where the the anger / victim mentality come from - a lack of trust in yourself to be respond differently when placed in the same situation.

I dealt with this directly - wife was showing behaviors that were questionable with an orbiter co-worker when I started MRP (there's a real warning to guys about anger + Rambo + nuking all beta somewhere in there) so I asked my lawyer to draw up papers just in case she crossed my boundary. The BP me would have mate guarded, whined, complained, begged her to work on things, eventually given in to her gas-lighting and she probably would have cheated. Funny enough, she intercepted the emails and it triggered a main event where she openly admitted she thought no matter what happened that I would always have a conversation with her to try and work things out - my response "Nope - some things don't warrant a discussion". I literally saw the hamster explode when I said it.

Honestly she may still cheat on me - I don't worry about it anymore as I'll handle it when and if the time comes and I trust myself to know when something isn't right.

[–]BostonBrakeJob0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

For sure, the mindfuckery that goes on here is incredible. I've had it happen to me, and I watch the same guys do it to others. Leading questions, baited statements...it's pretty fasinating really. In the end, I think most have to get there on their own for the changes to be organic. But those subliminal nudges definitely help get the ball rolling though.

It's interesting how that all worked out for ya too. Could've been much different if she never seen the email. Did you end up telling her you knew about the coworker and were getting your ducks in a row, after she found out?

[–]hack3geRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yep definitely could have been much different but I was fine with either ending - still could go either way to be honest but I don't have to tell you that.

 

Yes, I 100% told her and called her out on all of it. My message was basically I didn't give a fuck what she did with her life but she wouldn't be doing what she was doing as my wife. There were quite a number of other points I made but I was cold as fuck, zero emotion and as far as I can tell she got the message but if she didn't no biggie as I know I can and will walkaway from her if any bullshit happens from this point on and she knows that too now.

 

I learned a shitload - mostly things I had read, understood but never actually internalized. The biggest thing was that you truly are the container for your woman and she will treat you however you let her treat you and will get away with as much as you let her. She needs to know she has a strong man who will put her in her place, set/hold boundaries, never waver on his values and also walk away if it comes to it. She needs that in order to respect you which she needs in order to desire you which she needs in order to want to fuck you.

 

I'm far from done with my journey and have some stuff on my MAP that is going to be very uncomfortable for me as a lifelong beta but it needs to be done. At the very least I know now that I can trust myself to value my self-respect, my values and my life more than anyone or anything else in this world and I'm going to live my life that way from now until they put into the ground.

[–]weakandsensitive0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

I absolutely believe weak men deserve to be cheated on. It's covered in the post. BPP thinks the victims are the men getting cheated on. I think the victim is the woman having to deal with Joe Pansy.

A man turns into a sad sack of shit, who's now fat, overweight, indecisive and without ambition. What exactly do you expect the outcome to be? Lifelong loyalty and unending affection? If a woman can pull that off, she's a Saint.

Same thing - wife turns into a 300 pound lard whale that doesn't do jack shit to add value? Everyone's gonna sympathize with her, but no one's going to be surprised when you're banging the 25 year old secretary. No one's going around being like "Oh man... that tiger woods, rich handsome golfer, can't believe he'd go around banging all these different 20 something year old stunners. How in the world could that be?...."

It's really just statistical probably with a little bit of behavior thrown in. The expected outcome given x, y, and z variables in situation A is ...

I tell guys the same thing - you're doing so much whining. Think you can do better? Prove it.

Edit: Full disclosure, I have absolutely no tolerance or patience for weak men who go around looking for handouts and can't do any work. I'm sure that comes as a surprise.

[–]BostonBrakeJob0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

I agree it's to be expected, even understandable. IMO, though, for the man to "deserve" it would require the woman to tell him "I'm not attracted to you because you're a [x, y, z] piece of shit." Which they won't, for the most part, because they want us to "just get it" and all that other women's nature stuff.

Same as us telling men here, posting about weighing the options of cheating. A lot of the responses lean toward "have you tried leading her to a healthier lifestyle? Have you told her she's fat?" first, then if that fails go ahead and fuck some strange. As if to say, "it's still your fault you don't want to fuck your wife, cheat if you want but maybe try being overt with wifey first."

I get all the women's nature stuff (they want us to "just get it", not overt communicators and so on...), but at the end of the day they know what they're doing when they fuck around. While I understand, I don't see it as "deserved". Semantics.

Maybe I'm holding the fat fuck to my own standards. I'm definitely holding women at large to the men's standard of speaking up first, and fucking around after no action is taken. I know it's faulty thinking, but it's also nothing more than mental masturbation too. End of the day, I could give a fuck how many dudes other married women plow through, but I do know what to do if my wife ever would.

[–]weakandsensitive1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

for the man to "deserve" it would require the woman to tell him "I'm not attracted to you because you're a [x, y, z] piece of shit."

Disagree.

"it's still your fault you don't want to fuck your wife, cheat if you want but maybe try being overt with wifey first."

Disagree. I just posted this yesterday.

We have differing view points and standards. I have no issues with that.

I have no patience nor sympathy for people who are surprised by the obvious.

[–]BostonBrakeJob0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I have no patience nor sympathy for people who are surprised by the obvious.

Agreed, we took 2 different highways to end up at the same destination. I'd still say "what'd you expect?" to the guys that I don't think deserved it.

This has made me realize I view [masculine] men as a notch above women. I'm not real sure what, if anything, to do with this info yet, other than gnaw on it a bit...see where this wormhole goes lol

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I really identify closely with all of this. I'm struggling with expressing more anger to my wife than she deserves. The gym helps a lot, and overall I'm much happier, but I also get spasms of anger. I'm trying to get over the idea of partnership being a realistic goal, though my wife uses that word constantly.

[–]justpickanyusernameRed Beret2 points3 points  (7 children) | Copy

Is your wife overweight? If you were carrying an extra 100 pounds it is likely she was was carrying some extra baggage too. Couples tend to mirror each other in fitness and lifestyle. The good news is this works the other way too. Lead the entire family into a healthier lifestyle. Encourage her femininity and to exercise and eat well. It is important to you and let her know that.

In the end, you can’t force any of this and it is her choice. It is up to you how much effort you want to dedicate to it. It sounds like the wife goggles have officially come off.

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 2 points3 points  (6 children) | Copy

Yeah, she is. She’s been working on it, with steady but slow improvement. She’s even mentioned to me how I’m inspiring not only my family, but also extended family and acquaintances. People comment to her about it around our gym and social circles.

I’ve just been at this so long, even before finding MRP. I’m just burnt out. I found my strike zone, but it’s like I’m pitching perfect games for no-decisions and never getting any runs.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

Define overweight. Be exact.

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

5'6, 220. She's lost about 40lbs.

[–]Red_Ninja72 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

, but th

That's not overweight. That's obese.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Wow. Well you lost 100.

She has another 70# to go. 1-2 years possibly.

Put her on Keto.

[–]witnessthenomorebp0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Absolutely keto. I dropped almost 80 pounds in 4 months doing strict keto with no cardio but heavy lifting 4 to 5 times a week. Never in the gym for longer than 35 minutes and still the weight melted off. I've kept it off for 5 years and now put on muscle tithe time of 20 pounds. She will take longer since she is a woman, but it works.

[–]justpickanyusernameRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I would lead here again. Really it is yours and her only shot. Tell her we are going to be healthy and not have health issues when we get older. Throw away all of the shit in the house. Meal prep. Go to Amazon and pick these up. Put yourself and her on a strict diet and an exercise regime. The good news is you will drop even further down from 17% and she will start shedding the pounds as well.

She might call you insensitive dick, but do you really care? Your wife can't weigh more than you do.

What did she weigh when you first met? That is probably a reasonable expectation for a goal to meet. You should have that be your goal as well if you aren't there (with the exception of added muscle weight).

It will take her time, but hell, if you eat clean, hit your daily calories, and get her lifting it won't take too terribly long.

She will shit test you and outwardly hate you, but deep down she knows she is overweight and may be looking for leadership and a kick in the ass.

You need strong frame to continuously drag her ass a long in the process.

After seeing my obese father-in-law get diabetes and have two knee surgeries from excess weight I decided I was going to stay healthy. That was even before MRP. Now, it has taken a whole new meaning with lifting, but she is too big.

Good luck bro.

[–]ChokingDownRPRed Beret2 points3 points  (1 child) | Copy

In what sense do you find her unattractive? Physically? Is it related to anger/resentment that she hadn't always given you all that you now know she's capable of?

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

It’s both. She could be more feminine in both appearance and socially.

I’m past the anger/resentment. I understand why she didn’t want to fuck me and I don’t blame her for it.

[–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (3 children) | Copy

I would say shut up and lift but your numbers are pretty solid. That fat boy strength never goes away, does it?

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 4 points5 points  (2 children) | Copy

I actually lost gains in deadlift and squat as I skimmed down.

[–]2ndalRed Beret0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Yeah, I was about to refute your 5'10" 205lbs 17%bf but then I saw your lifts.

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I’m jacked and I love it. Slide into my DMs and I’ll show you what I’ve been up to getting there.

[–]weakandsensitive1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

How do you feel about having affairs?

What's she going to do? Leave? Call you an asshole?

What's the fear that's driving the indecision?

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Affairs aren't my style. She's explicitly aware of my options, and that is about the dread I can handle on that front. RP may be amoral, but I have my own set of boundaries, and that's one of them. I'd prefer to just be upfront about it than try to be covert.

Can't say I haven't thought about it.

[–]weakandsensitive1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

Okay - having said that, what's the chance of "Hey. I'm going to fuck 23 year old athletic college sluts. I don't plan on falling in love with them" going over?

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

When I dropped that line, it was met with intense mate guarding as she knew who the 28yo was.

My dumbass did it to make a point, I had a frame problem that day.

[–]djxput1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

You were her white knight the nice guy the one whom loved but wasn't loved back like you felt you deserved.

So you realised at some point being the white knight wasn't the way to go, and started looking after your needs.

Perhaps it's the fact that you feel more desirable now or then again this women didn't love you for whom you were back then but loves you now ... So perhaps you are acquiring the same judgements that you feel she or women in general do. Ie how do desirable women act and look and is your wife this way.

Again perhaps you felt that in the 10 years as a white knight you deserved love just like now. And subconsciously you have judgements of your wife based on a new criteria.

Perhaps ...

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red1 point2 points  (10 children) | Copy

Until you load up Bumble, meet a few randoms for drinks and get invited back to their house.

Your abundance is false hope.

Could you fuck another woman tomorrow? This weekend? Next week?

You are angry at yourself. Not her.

Get over it by either:

Hate fucking the fat off her.

Help her fo Rambo on her diet.

Push her to extreme sexual limits til she cracks.

Fuck another woman of five

Eject.

Kids?

No? Fuck it all and eject.

LPT: desire cannot be negioated by either sex. And once its gone. Its typically gone.

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 1 point2 points  (5 children) | Copy

I've had offers, randoms from the gym, chicks at the bar. Haven't pulled the trigger though.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red0 points1 point  (4 children) | Copy

randoms at the gym

This is the one place I simply never talk to women.

I am there to work. Not flirt.

I have a mean resting bitch face at the gym. Not going to lie.

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I don’t initiate at the gym. Ironically that’s how you get IOIs at the gym.

[–]drty_prRed Beret0 points1 point  (2 children) | Copy

You don't even give the occasional bro nod?

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Women bro. Don’t typically talk to women at the gym.

I am at the gym to talk and check out guys bodies.

No homo.

[–]drty_prRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Agreed

[–]hack3geRed Beret1 point2 points  (3 children) | Copy

LPT: desire cannot be negioated by either sex. And once its gone. Its typically gone.

Is this really true? I've been wrestling with this lately as I've been contemplating killing the puppy and trying to decide if its just my hamster looking to be lazy and not do the work bring myself to the next level.

I can see desire not being negotiated verbally but isn't restoring desire one of the side effects we see in practice with MRP principles being applied.

[–]drty_prRed Beret0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

It depends on how dead your bedroom really is. How dead is your?

[–]hack3geRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Frequency was the issue more so than enthusiasm in our dead bedroom.

Before MRP: 1-2 times a month, never starfish, it seemed like it was mostly for her to get herself off more than anything, usually was once during ovulation and once right before shark week.

&nbsp:

Post MRP: its been all over the place - we have had weeks where it was 5-6 times and others where it was none. On good weeks BJs are on the table again and she seems to enjoy when I push her limits with SGM stuff - hair pulling, choking, anal, etc. and on the off weeks I get hard no's and lots of LMR but if I get past it then shes always into it.

&nbsp:

Odds are its all me and something is different on those off weeks or shes just a woman. I had been dealing with a fair amount of anger for a while so I'm sure some of that contributed to it. If I am being honest with myself, my DL4 implementation is shit and I need to value my time better, sometimes my initiations are weak as fuck and I've got some real work to do at the higher dread levels. At this point I've settled on the fact that I'm either being lazy or scared and I need to keep working my MAP - either way its on me and killing the puppy isn't the solution just yet.

[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yes. It is really true. Esp if you are high value.

[–]BobbyPeruRed Beret0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

OYS - You’re angry because she treated you how betas get treated by women. Give it some time to see what happens when you get out of the anger phase.

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I suppose just because I'm less angry doesn't mean I'm not still angry. Thanks.

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Excellent deduction.

[–]MrChad_ThundercockBig Red Machine0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

“When Rollo taught me.....he is speaking to me now”

If Rollo told you to suck his dick would you?

[–]DeplorableRay[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Are you the MRP comic relief? Like the Kevin Hart of RP?

What your point?



You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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