Shit Test After Rejection

stonepimpletilists · 2017-01-06T20:39:12+00:00

Depends.

I'd say you aren't pulling away enough. it's great OI, but it's also a good time to go out for a day and do something on your own.

CAD used to have a great line, sticks with me to this day. Never say I love you if you aren't freshly fucked. for him, I think he meant 15 minutes. I treat it as a 48 hour rule.

reward good behaviour, don't reward bad behaviour. It should feel like a natural process. when she fucks you, she feels tingles, not just orgasm, but basking in the glow of your manbrain, free from the shakles of horniness. Oh, and what a great comfortable beast it is.

It only has teeth if you can leave the house, not answer your phone, and the possibility of you fucking Stacey is real.

^(Even if you're just crying in your car outside starbucks)

man_in_the_world · 2017-01-07T04:46:22+00:00

This is a very good sign!

These are shitty comfort tests. There are various older threads on MRP that define and discuss them.

They mean that she has noticed your progress and now feels nervous about turning you down, so she's fishing for either a shit-test fail to demonstrate that you're not worth worrying about, or reassurance that you don't mind her refusals; she'll take either at this point.

Your AM responses are perfect here; keep up the AM.

As you progess, these will turn into comfort tests or outright apologies, which you will want to handle correctly to give her calibrated relationship reassurance without absolving her responsibility for the refusal. After even more progress, she'll never turn you down.

Keep up the good work!

mrpthrowa · 2017-01-06T20:00:57+00:00

Your immediate responses are good.

Carry on doing that. But up your dread. Where are you in the levels? She thinks her precious pussy holds power. She thinks you have no options and can do no better.

470_2_700_nm · 2017-01-06T20:35:17+00:00

I started initiating all the time. Like even when I knew it would be a no. Many times a day. This got me past the one or two times in a day where I was really being rejected and it stung. Especially from her point of view, I'm sure it took some of the teeth out the special snowflake feeling she got from saying no.

Fuck, by the time she got to say no to the actual real possibility of us fucking, that hard no was kind of decensitized for both of us. This helped me remain more OI (it's still a sliding scale for me at times).

And it also rolled itself into gaming her too, since I was often kinoing before going for a sex act that I already knew was very unlikely (although I'm sure with enough game and SMV there is no such thing).

Also when you show her you've got a boner all the time, she's much less likely to be excited about you walking around about town in such a state. Which reminds me - you should have considered watching that game at a bar.

Last night I got a hard no because she was feeling unwell, this morning we woke up and I didn't even wait for the no, I just went for it. Before she could even think yes or no I was giving her a great message inside and out. I think they like that decisiveness.

BluepillProfessor · 2017-01-07T00:20:41+00:00

are these good techniques for deflecting the shit test

They look good on paper. The delivery and internalization are the real important issues.

Right now she has the power to withhold sex and she clearly loves it. She is fighting to maintain that power. My advice to men is to take away that power. By any means necessary.

fuckingfocusgodamnit · 2017-01-07T22:51:53+00:00

The direct approach 'yes I either wanted to fuck you or go to sleep' probably won't hurt you, but you've got a great opportunity to A&A this shit man.

Sit down, drop your face and take a very serious tone, "Yeah I've been meaning to talk to you about this baby, because I just got some not great test results back. I didn't want to worry you, but the doctors confirmed it to me today. [long pause] Whenever I get turned for sex down it lowers my heart rate significantly. If you're not careful baby you could put me in a coma. [let her react, call you an asshile, storm away, etc] I really believe in us though. I think we can beat this if we can just come together!"

drty_pr · 2017-01-06T22:13:26+00:00

That's such bullshit behavior from her. It seems to me you did the right thing. Holding frame is tough.

I even use the holding frame concept in business negotiations now. In the past clients drew me into their drama excuse frames and I fell for it. Now I stay in my frame... but I digress

drty_pr · 2017-01-07T14:56:37+00:00

Her hamster won't rest.

You could also fog:

"We could have just cuddled" -> "Yes, we could have."

Mecha75 · 2017-01-06T19:56:43+00:00

Thats not a shit test. That is outright disrespect. She is rubbing it in your face.

nonnimoose · 2017-01-06T23:09:05+00:00

Are the no's really hard no's and when she's bringing it up the next day is it belittling or is it whiny? Because to me it reads like she was needing you to push a bit harder in those instances. Especially in the first one: "kinda receptive," then next day looking for comfort.

Maybe since there are times when she responds easily or initiates herself, you feel that there isn't/shouldn't be a need for you to be more aggressive. For me there are times when I'm not really in the mood but with more push I will get into it. I feel like my husband knows this so if he doesn't keep up the escalation, I might be fine with it in the moment but the next day I'm wondering if he really wanted me.

They call this LMR followed by hamstering here. :D

BobbyPeru · 2017-01-06T22:11:48+00:00

I think she's waiting for you to try to push past some of those no's… Maybe at least on the first one. The second one where she wasn't even kissing you was BS - i'd consider that an immediate hard no.

So what I would do is push past the soft no's and see if you can actually have sex or wait for the hard no. If you get a hard no, ghost her.

As far as her comments go, those are shit tests but borderline disrespect. I would A&A the shit out of those or STFU if it's blatant disrespect, followed by ghosting.

JDRoedell · 2017-01-07T22:19:33+00:00

I think your responses are good here. As BPP pointed out, it does matter what your body language and tone are projecting so be conscious of that but on paper, you're doing it right.

My wife does this too and I've unabashedly and without guilt told her, "cuddles aren't free", "no thanks, I want to fuck, not cuddle", etc. Or I go out and she says, "you don't have to avoid me because we aren't doing it." And I'll just smile and leave.

GongShanks · 2017-01-10T20:54:58+00:00

You know why Canadians fuck doggy style? So they can both watch the hockey game.

TheRedThrowAwayPill · 2017-01-07T11:42:53+00:00

"like last night when you tried to get some and I turned you down so you went to sleep. We could have just cuddled"

You idiot!

She's telling: "TRY AGAIN!" (But try harder this time)

You should have responded with "I ain't interested in cuddling - I wanna fuck your ass". Something blunt and base. Caveman like.

The second time she's simply making fun of your pathetic attempt: a kiss? Wtf? Reach for her underwear while standing next to her and start tugging on it like "why you gotta be all dressed and shit women?"

medium "no"

Keep escalating. "By no I assumed you meant yes. So confusing. I'll just make believe I didn't hear it".

Or simply just say it straight out: "yo, how long this bullshit libido of yours gonna take. This nut ain't gonna bust itself; and for the love of god would you please drop your underwear already?!"

All_Ads_Deceive · 2017-01-07T13:09:23+00:00

Slap her ass. Grab her pussy. You need to make her feel naughty. Be bold

Title	Shit Test After Rejection
Author	drty_pr
Upvotes	6
Comments	68
Date	06 January 2017 07:48 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	askMRP
Link	https://theredarchive.com/post/206680
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/5mfpyj/shit_test_after_rejection/