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Who do you talk to?

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August 16, 2019

I like you guys. I’ve been a faggot before for posting faggot shit and even though it stingsild my retarded ego it helps, and I appreciate it, gentlemen.

Now. I had my first panic attack today. If you’ve never had one let me tell you, that shit is horrible, traumatizing. You’re convinced you’re dying from a heart attack, you have all the physical symptoms of a heart attack and you feel you’re fading away and dying right then and there.

Naturally my girlfriend (living together for 3 years) gets to know as she comes home and I’m not there, I tell her I’m on the way home from the ER, not gonna lie to her. I had a fucking panic attack. I took too much PWO, I trained extremely hard, and my brain thought my body was dying.

She gives me a lot of shit, probably rightfully so because I took more PWO than usual and I should know to stop lifting when I’m dizzy. Ok I’ll take it.

However I just want someone to fucking talk to, that shit traumatized me, I was sure I was a gonner. I’m not going to talk to my gf of my sissy feelings when she’s had a shitty day too and is tired and in a foul mood.

So who do you guys talk to about shit like that? The shit that’s probably not healthy to STFU about. Or maybe it is, what the fuck so I know.

Post Information
Title Who do you talk to?
Author IOwnMyShit
Upvotes 15
Comments 51
Date 16 August 2019 08:44 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askMRP
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/250117
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/crc7ts/who_do_you_talk_to/
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[–]red-sfpplusHard Core Red11 points12 points  (8 children) | Copy

So who do you guys talk to about shit like that?

Myself in the gym.

My Mom.

My BFF's

My Starbucks groups

Anon fags on here.

[–]IOwnMyShit1 point2 points  (6 children) | Copy

Thank you for reminding me of my mom, we’ve both been busy lately and haven’t had a proper chat in quite a while.

If there’s anyone I can be a really pussy to and not give a fuck it’s her!

[–]RisingUpAgain7 points8 points  (5 children) | Copy

You think she’s your friend.

Took me a long time to realize she’s not. She wants you to stay a boy Peter Pan.

[–]go-RED-go2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Mom wants her child to always be safe, she is wired that way. That's why she'll mostly give you crap blue pilled advice - play it safe, be well behaved, stay in your comfort zone, don't ever change from the little boy she knows, you are good this way.

She means well, but if you let her influence you, you will apsolutely hinder your growth. At least in my expirience.

[–]red-iron-man2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

This comment made me laugh because it's so true. I'm 46 and my mother keeps commenting that I'm getting too muscular and I need to shave my short beard. Basically she doesn't like anything masculine when it comes to her sons.

[–]griz3lda-4 points-3 points  (2 children) | Copy

Lol you know him mom? Projection much?

[–]RisingUpAgain3 points4 points  (1 child) | Copy

It’s true of all mothers

[–]RPMorpheus1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yup. It's why there's a deep need for a father in the home.

[–]RPMorpheus0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Anon fags on here.

I'll be your huckleberry


[–]gameoflibidos9 points10 points  (3 children) | Copy

Simple answer here... don't fucking take pre-work out garbage with 400mg of caffine in it especially if you are older unless you really do want to have a heart attack and double especially if you are using gear. You are basically beating your heart with a mace. If you insist on pre work out crap, drink an extra shake before hand and that's good enough.

[–]IOwnMyShit1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

You’re right, I’m mid twenties, no gear so atleast there is that, but fuck taking that again. I’kl rather have a weak workout than going through that again.

Live and learn. Unless you go overboard with retardedness.

[–]Thorondor_Rising1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

BCAAs only. You some sort of recovering meth addict?

[–]i-am-the-prize6 points7 points  (6 children) | Copy

pwo = pre/post work out ____ ?

you talk to your male friend, who lifts too, so who could relate.

do you have guy friends you can call/txt?

[–]IOwnMyShit3 points4 points  (5 children) | Copy

I was in bad social circles for many years and just recently cut ties with them due to drug abuse. I’ve not yet built new strong friendships that I’m comfortable sharing this with.

Edit: Oh and yes, pre workout, about 400mg caffeine + niacin and other fun stuff. Legal, from a well known local brand, also within recommended dose, I used to take half a scoop, today I took a whole scoop.

[–]vplatt7 points8 points  (1 child) | Copy

Jeezus, that is a LOT of caffeine to take in one shot, and you took twice that, right?! Just stop that. Drink some black coffee during the afternoon if want a boost. Keep the niacin and other crap if it really helps you, but extra stimulants are just silly IMO.

[–]Thorondor_Rising0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

No, quit taking caffeine altogether. Its completely unnecessary and fucks with your sleeping patterns.

[–]RPMorpheus3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

Why the fuck are you taking niacin? That causes flushing and rash like symptoms that could have contributed to your panic attack.

200mg caffeine is the absolute max you should be taking in one sitting. Consider anything more as OD.

[–]Ketonian_Empire0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

When is the last time you have done a pwo/caffeine cycle? Force yourself to go off it for 3 weeks, cleanse that shit out of you. Then you can pick it up again at 1/2 a scoop will feel like a whole scoop again.

[–]umizumiz0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I've been there. You need this time.

[–]DeplorableRay6 points7 points  (3 children) | Copy

Most men here don’t have fathers to rely on, or I would suggest him. I think most men find a place like this because they don’t have other men to rely on. Maybe you found a place here.

[–]IOwnMyShit10 points11 points  (2 children) | Copy

The sad reality, but hey we’re responsive for our own improvement so fuck it.

My dad is extremely awkward to talk to, I don’t know him on a deep level. He means well but he’s a total BP beta that avoids any uncomfortable subject like the plague. Oh well it is what it is.

[–]electric_dragon15 points6 points  (1 child) | Copy

We have the same dad?!

[–]IOwnMyShit0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

What’s up my brother from another mother!

Or maybe we have the same mother too and got separated at birth shit

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (4 children) | Copy

Your bros. You got those right? Tell them about your Feelz, certainly not your gf.

You got a daddy, those can be good too. I'm pretty alone concerning getting my Feelz out but I do have a few bros I can dump shit on if I'm really losing it. Usually, I just meditate. Mediation and clearing your mind of thought does wonders. A man who cannot control is mind is not a very strong man.

[–]IOwnMyShit6 points7 points  (3 children) | Copy

I’m into meditation, does wonders for me. Suppose the sole reason was the new amount of PWO I took.

No bros, all are heavily into drugs and I had to choose between them and sobriety, so here I am, sober.

[–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Find some new bros. A martial art or gym isn't a bad place. You need somone to talk to, even mrp isn't a bad place. I have a few people I can text if shit goes down.

[–]Batman12860 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Good for you man. Talk about it here. I haven't made a post yet. I'm working through the sidebar and trying to turn around my marriage. I developed a panic disorder 6 years ago. I'm married with 2 kids under the age of five and my marriage is fucked because I opened up and showed weakness.. Hoping stfu, lift and sidebar can turn it around... But honestly looking like a bitch with anxiety and a panic disorder has destroyed my marriage.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

“Hoping stfu, lift and sidebar can turn it around”

Nope, it won’t but it will turn you around. And then your marriage may or may not survive. At that point that’ll be up to you.

And trust me - your faggotry doesn’t hold a candle to where I was when I found this place. Just get to work. Best advice I can give you: give it lots of time. There’s no overnight success stories here.

Oh and post - every fucking week in the own your shit thread. And be brutally honest in that thread - people will call you a faggot when it’s deserved but whatever - don’t lie to yourself. Ever.

[–]RStonePT2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don't talk about your panic attacks. When you lift, stop fucking around and stress your CNS, it will mute the panic considerably. Beyond that, there is something setting it off. Be mindful when it happens for what mental feedback loops you've created and learn to normalize it. Instead of starting to panic over something being wrong, accept the panic is natural for whatever the trigger is

Taken together they turn a 10 Into a 2.

Beyond that, keep it to yourself. Your girl don't care, your friends do but can't help.

Edit, just saw you're dosing on dumb shit. Take a guess on how this goes away dumbass

[–]IRunYourRiver3 points4 points  (0 children) | Copy

I'm on the "talk to no one" plan. Sure, I talk all day long at work. But never about my fears or my feelz. I used to buy into the "let it all out, dear" philosophy and sought out a good emotional conversation. But, inevitably, those left me feeling thoroughly unsatisfied. I honestly question the whole assumption that we even need a shoulder to cry on. Is that really what you need or are you parroting a shit test (that you failed) from a former girlfriend? I find that beating the shit out of my body on a long hike or crazy hill repeats in inclement weather with a bro is far more therapeutic than searching for the words to express the yearnings of my inner void. Maybe I'm headed for a crash, but so far so good.

[–]NoCoast821 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

She gives me a lot of shit

She is going to push the hardest when you are the weakest, because who you are some of the time is who you are all of the time

I understand panic attacks, getting my hormones inline fixed those for me. Then I had pericarditis this spring... basicly persistent heart attack symptoms for weeks. I was smart enough to STFU and go through all the testing without whining to my wife, and she still gives me shit about my "man cold"

I don't know where you are at in the world, my part of the country finding men with similar interests who aren't bitches or sad alcoholics that still act like they are teenagers (and fucking embarrassing with women) is something I have yet to accomplish.

[–]IOwnMyShit0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Man that sounds rough, I sent a note to my doc, going to get my blood checked for all kinds of levels and deficiencies.

Downplayed it to my gf, said it was just a reaction and it didn’t bother me. It doesn’t really today but I was shook yesterday. Oh well I’ll do smarter choices going forward.

I live in Scandinavia so people here are probably the most feminized faggots on the planet earth. Like 99% of men will back talk you instead of confronting you with an issue.

[–]ghb20191 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

Suffered with them for years.

Knowing its only a panic attack is key to not letting it snowball into panic disorder, which is what happened me for years as I was convinced it was a heart problem,

Meditation to calm the mind and body,

Stop pre workouts, why do you need it, have a cup of coffee for a boost if your tired,

Supplements to calm the nervous system - Amino acid Glycine, Magnesium, Phosphatadyl serine if anxiety/panic affects your sleep. A good B complex, as deficiencies in B Vitamins can put your body in this state. Adrenal optimizer

If you dont do cardio then add some in as cardio burns off the excess adrenaline that will cause panic attacks,

Look up breathing exercises and distraction methods for if it strikes again

[–]IOwnMyShit1 point2 points  (1 child) | Copy

This is real solid advice, thanks!

Pwo went into the garabage the moment I came home, not touching that again. Probably minimal coffee aswell.

[–]ghb20190 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Also I forgot to add,, get a book or audio book on CBT or do an online course in it,

Cognitive behavioural therapy basically retrains your brain,, For example in its basic form it would be thinking ok how many times have I felt like I was gonna die, have a heart attack ect, how many times has it been this bad or worse before,

Ok now How many of those times did I actually die, have a heart attack, collapse or what I was fearing happening actually happen? None is the answer, Use this to strengthen the mind

[–]griz3lda1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Yo, I used to have frequent ones. It is NOT an anxiety attack, and anyone would be alarmed to feel those symptoms. It's literally a fake heart attack. Wish it were called something else. What's fucked up is it turned out I also had a legit heart condition.

Anyway, the day it all stopped was the day I was like "I don't give a fuck if I drop dead right now! I HOPE I pass out so my autonomic system will self-regulate w/o me goofing it up!" You gotta accept it, don't fight the feelings.

[–]ReddJiveRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I don’t talk to any one. Not even guys really want to hear your emotional BS. I mean you can but odds are you’re going to get the man up speech in one form or another, so why not just give it to yourself. I work my shit out in the gym. Which is why I don’t get this tribe shit that’s now all the rage. It’s a support group. In a tribe a man has to be a functioning member coming in first...any way I digress.....

Lift Angry. works wonders. I also take it out on a student in the dojo. Being a higher level black belt I decide my training so I can tell a brown belt to suit up and get in the ring.

Any way. Stop PWO. I don’t know why people take that shit. 3 cups of coffee do the same damn thing. Creatine can destroy your kidneys. Glutamine if fine but get a tasty protein shake for that. Who the fuck knows what else is in PWOs these days. It’s not regulated so I would be careful about what it is your taking.

Just tell her that you had a bad reaction to your PWO. Shrug and go...well won’t be doing that again. Laugh it off. Go to bed.

Now....your man up speech. Stop reliving the mistakes of your past and focus on the moments of today. That is really what you are feeling. You saw mortality. Replaying a situation over and over again in your head is not a productive way to live — that's a fucking Boomerang that belongs on some annoying THOT’s Instagram.

[–]Spitoutthebone770 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

That sucks man. I have had bouts of various levels of anxiety attacks. Linked with the gym and around large groups of people. I flat out saw someone and they just gave me some tools to help relax the mind and body. All the best brother.

[–]addwater0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

A psychologist / counsellor / your male friends

[–]WolfofAllStreetz0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I get them too. Thanks genetics. Cut the caffeine its horrible for that shit.

Go see a psychiatrist, dont vent to your girl about this shit. You are a man. Act like it.

[–]resolutions3160 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Start doing Jiu Jitsu. Make friends.

[–]Imaginary_Historian0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

You have any brothers or sisters?

I had a panic attack three years ago. I called my brother. He and I aren't that close but he was a lot of help, because I had no idea he had had panic attacks too and had learned how to deal with them. I never had another panic attack.

[–]Typo-MAGAshiv0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

If you work in a traditionally masculine field, a close co-worker can be ok for thiis.

Recommended fields: non-POG military unit, law enforcement, firefighters, other rescue workers, skilled trades, oil rig work, construction work.

DO NOT CONSIDER IT IF YOU WORK IN ONE OF THESE VAGINIZED PLACES: anything corporate, retail, food service (unless you're a line cook with all men), call center, government administration, etc.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children) | Copy

I got my brothers and two close guy friends.

One of my friends is extremely beta, the other is much more alpha. I basically consider what the beta says and do the opposite if he gives any advice. My other friend is great to run stuff through and I can puke at him and he sets me right most of the time.

For instance when a couple of weeks ago wife was going crazy and being a bitch:

Beta Friend: you should just apologize. Happy wife happy life right?

Alpha friend: give her space, ignore her for the most part, leave the house for awhile if it gets to you. Give me a call if you want, we can grab coffee or some shit.

Edit: So I read your full post... panic attacks eh? That shit sucks. You know what sucks even worse? Having them nearly every day for twenty years. SSRIs for twenty years. Having Xanax with me just in case for twenty years. Yeah... that sucks.

Here’s my advice on them: no stimulants, no alcohol, get enough sleep, exercise, lift heavy, read the sidebar, stfu. Seriously, twenty fucking years - since I was 15. 36 now. What cured them was this place. I haven’t had one in probably five months and not a serious one since finding this place (for the two days after I did i was crippled in bed from them - finding your entire world a lie can do that).

[–]FoxShitNasty830 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

This place also cured me of panic attacks. Thank fuck

Edit: they started when my wife agressivly mentioned we should get married... even my subconscious saw the red flag

[–]proplfax0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

panic attacks eh? That shit sucks. You know what sucks even worse? Having them nearly every day for twenty years. SSRIs for twenty years. Having Xanax with me just in case for twenty years. Yeah... that sucks

what ultimately stopped them?

i've heard xanax withdrawal is one of the craziest things you can go through. rough.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

What stopped them was lifting, the sidebar, and STFU.

Seriously... NMMNG and the Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck combined with learning about stoicism had the biggest impact.

I was never addicted to Xanax. Used as needed which was rare. It was the sense of security of having it around that helped. I only used for the crippling ones. The others... just dealt with

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Obligatory you're a dumbass. Talk to your dude friends, online or otherwise, about that kind of shit. Your girl doesn't want to hear it.

If she asks about it or brings it up again, just tell her that you took too much caffeine, worked out like a caveman and thought you were having a heart attack. You don't have to frame it like you're working on a mental disorder or some shit like that.

With that having been said, and to provide an example of talking to dudes about shit like this, I've had panic attacks before. My full diagnosis is C-PTSD/complex trauma and developmental trauma, and having a nervous system that's predisposed to overactive anxiety is a part of that. I can count on one hand the number of panic attacks I've had since I hit 20 (I'll be 35 in a few months), but it was a bitch before that because I had no idea (and no guidance) on how to handle it. I'm lucky that I got my shit together on most of that at such a fairly young age because that's pretty much the embodiment of hell if you don't learn how to deal with all of that.

Random fun fact just because I never really get to talk about this shit: People diagnosed with C-PTSD/complex trauma have much higher rates of autoimmune disorders like lupus because the ratios of the types of neurons you have are so different. It literally changes the makeup of how your nervous system grows as you go through childhood and puberty.

Coming off of that tangent, in my experience, the panic attacks were much, much worse before I understood what was happening because I thought I was having a heart attack or something and that I was going to die, and that fed into it and made it worse. It also made me feel like my body/mind were just out of control, and it gave me an odd sense that my body was somehow betraying me.

But thankfully for me, I got that shit sorted out about 15 years ago, and thankfully for you, it's unlikely that you'll run into this anymore unless you try to OD on caffeine like a dipshit again.

[–]thatboyjeff0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

400mg of caffeine plus a possible niacin flush?

You fuckin idiot.

Don’t tell your girl your feelz. She doesn’t give a fuck, even if she’s your LTR/wife.

[–]BobbyPeruRed Beret-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

You shouldn’t need that to motivate yourself to work out... I’ll have 50g protein before and after my workout. Quit being a faggot and relying on that garbage.

As far as panic attacks, I used to have them often when I was a faggot. Once an emergency doc finally figured out they were panic attacks, I haven’t had one since- that was probably 7 years ago. So, just realize it’s not a heart attack unless you keep taking that garbage. Just the knowledge that it was a panic attack helped me to never have one again . I’m not even kidding – I was probably at emergency six times thinking I was having a heart attack before any emergency doctor finally figured that it was a panic attack.

Don’t talk to your woman about your feeeeellings even if she’s the only one available. Find some bro’s even if you have to join some groups. Start doing some research on stoicism and practice it.

Suggested reading - Practical Female Psychology For the Practical Man - in the book, they go into how talking about your feelings to your woman as a stage in the betaization process

I’m sure you’ll downvote this because you are a faggot, and that’s what faggots do instead of looking at the truth (I see you downvoted a bunch on here homo.

[–]Big_Daddy_PDX-1 points0 points  (0 children) | Copy

Don’t bother talking to anyone until you have a frame and a mission. Your girl just sees you as the faggot you are.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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