Q4Women (both RP and BP, I guess): Do you think "creep shaming" is right considering that guys are still expected to make the first move?

planejane · 2016-11-09T10:38:05+00:00

The whole concept of shaming a guy for making the first move is deplorable.

Shaming guys who can't take the third or seventh or thirtieth "no?" Totally OK.

MisgenderedCactus · 2016-11-09T10:41:53+00:00

Absolutely. I personally am very understanding towards most men who ask me out, and are rarely creeped out by such simple things as awkward advances, stuttering, odd body language, etc. I know that it hurts to be rejected, so if they look pained by my declination of their offer to date, I'll even give them a hug. It's the least I can do to try and make them feel better, especially after they got up the courage to ask.

Now, I will say that I'm less kind towards those men who "ask" me out on the street or who do so in an "alpha" way. If you're hollaring at me as I walk by and make comments about my body...I'm just going to ignore you. If you come up to me while I'm working, lean on my counter like you own it, and have the arrogance to tell me you're picking me up at 8...I will do everything I can to never be around you again. These types of guys aren't creepy either, they're just assholes.

Zoidbergluver · 2016-11-09T11:35:26+00:00

It's not like women just shame guys for anything. Look at r/creepypms, those guys are overtly sexual or don't even know the person they are messaging on Facebook.

It's not about "making the first move", it's about being an actual creepy person. Also, what women honestly don't approach men these days? I do all the time, otherwise I would never get the guy I liked to talk to me!

fuxdpus · 2016-11-09T12:10:56+00:00

The word "creepy" has become meaningless bullshit because of the way women throw it around so much. They call men creepy just for trying to talk to them or looking at them.

A lot of these women are going to end up alone after being pumped and dumped by a small number of Chads and players through their younger years. Because once they're old and postwall, the guys they used to call "creeps" will be like "fuck that shit, I'd rather jerk off than fuck that loose used up pussy and put up with this woman's bullshit".

I don't want anything to do with postwall women who come around me looking for attention. Their loose wrinkly vaginas aren't worth the calories I would burn having sex with them. Only young attractive pussy is worth fucking for me.

shoup88 · 2016-11-09T15:59:11+00:00

Shaming is a societal tool to discourage certain behaviours, like being "creepy". If a man uses the "wrong approach", he's not going to be successful. If we don't correct him and show him the right way to approach, we're doing him a disservice.

Do you want men to be happy and ignorant (and alone), or do you want them to be educated on what works and what doesn't?

Christian_Kong · 2016-11-09T16:09:32+00:00

It is not right, but it doesn't happen often without provocation. I am 35, I might approach a 22 year old girl, get rejected and she may privately say "ewww, that gross old guy just hit on me" to her friends. This is perfectly acceptable creep shaming.

If she were to make a loud public scene after my first attempt: not acceptable.

If she were to make a loud public scene after my 9th attempt: acceptable.

[deleted] · 2016-11-09T17:00:35+00:00

Well what else am I supposed to do when someone egregiously creeps on me? Clap and give him a fucking medal?

(kw: egregiously)

Mentathiel · 2016-11-09T18:30:41+00:00

RP perspective? We should shame them, it discourages the weak ones from bothering, thus helping us avoid them and it does a part of the selection for us. But it's better if we do it covertly, through general peer pressure and more jokingly, so we wouldn't ruin our own image.

Conventional morality perspective? Of course it's bloody wrong! I understand that you'd feel like they're creepy and feel threatened and want to get rid of them, but they're still human beings and if they seem so creepy to you they're probably suffering all sorts of rejection all the time and if you can make it a tad better for them with 0 effort on your part, why not?

A bit of a third perspective... It's okay to ignore creepy online messages from strangers. It isn't shaming to say that it's creepy to send someone you don't know and essay about how you want to lick their feet. It might still be more humane to be nice, but at some point you just need to draw the line over which you won't put the effort in for strangers who might as well be trolling, psychologically impaired or trying to work out if the tactic of sending 100 messages of that sort would land them one reply form an attention-starved female.

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[deleted] · 2016-11-09T15:13:40+00:00

OK. I think it's wrong to shame guys for being creepy in the absence of anything that would even hint at wrongdoing. It's wrong to shame unattractive guys for asking the time of day of women. It's wrong to wonder, aloud, if an unattractive guy is a pedophile because he's never been seen with a guy or girl.

However, if a guy's stalking a woman, or groping her, or doing something he ought not be doing? Shame away.

rulenumber303 · 2016-11-10T11:51:44+00:00

I think creep shaming is a duty.

sideacctbh · 2016-11-17T08:03:10+00:00

Approached is one thing. However - some things people say are super creepy.

Title	Q4Women (both RP and BP, I guess): Do you think "creep shaming" is right considering that guys are still expected to make the first move?
Author	SlashCo80
Upvotes	5
Comments	99
Date	November 9, 2016 10:08 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/5c09l1/q4women_both_rp_and_bp_i_guess_do_you_think_creep/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4women-both-rp-and-bp-i-guess-do-you-think-creep.271932 https://theredarchive.com/post/271932

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