Question for both pills: Do women ignore nice guys in favor of jerks and bad boys?

taiboworks · 2015-06-13T16:49:55+00:00

they ignore physically unattractive nice guys in favor of physically attractive jerks and bad boys just as men ignore physically unattractive nice girls in favor of physically attractive bitches. most people prefer attractive looks and a good personality, but that's that hardest to land because most people don't have good looks and a good personality.

MagicGainbow · 2015-06-13T16:51:24+00:00

I don't think they ignore them, I think the ''nice guy'' whether actually nice or not just doesn't register as being in the running so to speak.

[deleted] · 2015-06-14T05:56:48+00:00

Do you believe there's any truth to the stereotype that many women ignore nice guys and gentlemen in favor of cocky 'bad boys' who often end up treating them abusively?

Of course.

If yes, why do you think that is?

Because nice guys are emotional sluts. That is unattractive.

[deleted] · 2015-06-13T16:59:34+00:00

Its not that women ignore them. Its that "nice" guys have an indefinite jammer against her radar. She cant even register attraction to them.

despisedlove2 · 2015-06-14T04:24:46+00:00

Evolution.

A bad boy is more likely to bring home the animal for the family to eat.

exit_sandman · 2015-06-13T17:23:00+00:00

Let me put it like this: overly nice behavior (example) hamstrings your dating life; while displaying assholish behavior doesn't nearly as much as women say it does (and even when it is the case, the guy who displays assholish behavior is also far more likely to move on to the next target, i.e. at the end of the day he still has more success than the nice guy who orbits his presumptive love interest).

belletaco · 2015-06-13T17:01:36+00:00

I don't think people (men) understand what girls mean when they say "bad boy". We don't want absuive assholes who treat us like shit. We want James Dean like sexy on a motorcycle who makes our mom upset that we're seeing them because they are a bad influence. It's fun.. when you're in high school. No, WOMEN don't want "bad boys" and nice guys isn't really a thing, it's a label guys who are needy, clingy and boring give themselves.

[deleted] · 2015-06-13T21:00:44+00:00

I don't think they ignore nice guys outright. Unless the girl is really stuck-up, they acknowledge them and give them attention, sometimes even leading them on for personal favors if the guy is stupid enough to let himself be put in that situation. They like 'bad boys' more and are more attracted to them.

Carkudo · 2015-06-14T10:15:50+00:00

Some people have issues and actually pursue "bad" people because of them. But I don't think ALL women always want the bad boy. I know enough women to realize that many of them do enjoy genuine kindness, sensitivity and so on.

It's just that, all those traits must come AFTER the man is established to be sexually attractive. And attractive people are often assholes because they can get away with it.

[deleted] · 2015-06-14T17:29:35+00:00

Yes but with reservations. A lot of women who have a lower educational level prefer cocky 'bad boys' however women with a degree tend to seek beta.

I think this is because a lot of people in lower educational levels have kids before, rather than after marriage and also being a badboy is a more socially accepted form of masculinity in proletarian culture. So the concentration of people who appear alpha is much higher in the inner city. For all races. There was a book called Black Rednecks that shows that a lot of what is considered ghetto is not racial but class related.

I think red pill and a lot of other 'regressive' ideas, for example more Barbie women in the media like Beyonce and Kim Kardashian, wearing a lot of makeup with contouring for women, strongly masculine rap and bro-country music, lifting weights and the Zyzz look for a guy comes from the working class, the upper class being more androgynous.

SWPL women especially minorities are more into natural hair whether it's kinky hair, straight stringy hair, dreads, non dyed color etc. while prole women of all races go for the Instagram-approved cartoon wavy texture with ombre. The role model for prole women's style is the Real Housewives and the Kardashians. SWPL = Stuff White People Like, but it refers to all races in the upper middle class. There is also a SWPL / Prole divide in much of the world. For example tattoos are a major prole signifier for men in East Asia.

Even looking at a very specific example: black women with blue hair, we can see a prole / SWPL divide.

Typical prole blue haired black girl

Typical SWPL blue haired black girl

The upper middle class SWPLs listen to mellow music like Tame Impala, Death Cab for Cutie, and wears skinny jeans with the #nomakeupselfie for women. They eat more vegetarian fare and a little Soylent. The working class listens to bro country, Lil Wayne, and hardcore EDM Euro Disco that makes me feel like lifting weights. They drink Muscle Milk, beer, and eat burgers.

In the metal and goth scenes, there are similar divides. SWPLs listen to prog like Opeth, "post metal" like Neurosis and Deafheaven, old Goth like the Cure, and bands like Mastodon that sing about literature. Proles listen to All That Remains, Cannibal Corpse and EBM (Goth club EDM). Proles read Marvel comics, SWPLs read Alan Moore. Proles are more visually stimulated and use Instagram and Snapchat, SWPLs are here on Reddit.

Like it or not the working class is growing because the economy is sucking more and more. College graduates are beginning to prole drift. I don't think this is really a negative thing, because I like streetwear styles and prefer prolish makeup which I think is more glamorous. However this is causing the AFBB concern to spread from the lower middle class to the SWPL group.

Lonny_zone · 2015-06-14T19:50:56+00:00

Women like handsome, masculine men. These men have the intimidation factor to get away with more than the average man and do as they please, becoming "bad boys."

Handsome, masculine men learn that they have lots of options. They grow "cocky." They can treat women as disposable sex machines, so they tend to do so because men are usually polygynous.

Most romantic fiction tends to portray the perfect-looking successful guy, and makes him dead set on the protagonist, treating her like a queen, which is unrealistic.

When women give advice to "be nice," this is what they want hot guys to be, they don't care how nicely a neckbeard with zero options will treat them. Women want a master, not a servant. This is why the conventional saying "women don't care about looks" is a big lie.

The reality is women care about men's looks until their own appearance dries up, then they might go for the most attractive successful "nice guy" they can find.

When an unattractive guy uses red pills, his attitude reminds a woman of high-quality men who got away, so on an unconscious level she thinks she is getting someone who is superior to what he actually may be.

wazzup987 · 2015-06-13T16:49:39+00:00

if by nice guy you mean spineless simp then yes,

if you mean decent person who is honest about their intentions and can and will stand up for them selves even with people who they want to sleep with then no

[deleted] · 2015-06-13T17:27:53+00:00

Nice guys and Jerks are labels. Instead lets call them this, nice guy is considered the guy who DOES NOT create sexual tension, the "tingles" or any sort of excitement in a girl he meets. It's not so much about being nice specifically, but rather his actions do not entice a girl or portray his sexual intentions in a attractive, fun, thrilling way. Overall, no sexual tension.

The jerk on the other hand is a guy who creates a good amount of "tingles", sexual tension, and enticement in a girl, where his actions manage to express his sexual intentions to her in a confident way. A jerk, creates something I call social contrast, where his actions, body language, appearance, words, or presence illicit a type of pressure or tension in a girl that is more intense than everyday interactions, or interactions you would have with friends.

The biggest difference between the guy who does not create the sexual tension and the guy who does is that the guy who does not create sexual tension expects the girl to initiate that sort of tension herself after being treated kindly and genuinely, which rarely, rarely happens. Most women, want a confident, attractive man to approach them, because it's exciting.

sohamster · 2015-06-13T17:31:29+00:00

SOME women do. Not me. Women are humans. Humans vary. Some people like broccoli, some don't. Some men stay with abusive women, some don't. It makes life safe and tidy to think in black and white terms, but it's erroneous. Some nice guys get passed by because they are so shy women think they are not interested. Some men think they are nice guys, when they are really just passive aggressives with a sense of entitlement. That is a turn off.

imaterriblelurker · 2015-06-13T17:09:34+00:00

It depends on how you define "nice guys" and how you define "jerks" . I don't think most of those popular guys are actually bad people .

I remember some months ago , my friend was in a relationship with a guy. He wasn't a jerk , but she wanted to break up with him because he played video games all day and was ultra passive and boring . I told her to give him a chance because he was really a "nice guy" and she replied : What does "nice guy" even mean ? Everybody is a nice guy , it's not like they have killed anyone .

buartha · 2015-06-13T17:31:36+00:00

Women ignore nice men who have nothing going for them other than that niceness, because boring is boring no matter how you wrap it up.

Nice men who are also fun to be around and decent looking do as well as 'jerks' and 'bad boys' from what I've seen, and seem to attract more stable girls.

Sirbush · 2015-06-13T16:53:32+00:00

No there is no truth to that stereotype. The fact of the matter is, attractive peope know they are attractive, therefore act "cocky". Women just like men that are strong condident men. Throw in some attraction and you got yourself a winner.

The "Nice Guy" r/Niceguys. Are generally people that act "nice" thinking that just by acting like a decent human being a girl is going to have sex with them. It dosent work like that and it usually takes a while for boys to realize that you can't deposit nice guy tokens in a girl in return for sex.

thereddespair · 2015-06-13T19:55:16+00:00

from what i see no. they string the nice guys while they pursue the ass guys. so theyre not ignored per se, more like taken advantage of maybe.

rulenumber303 · 2015-06-13T17:15:45+00:00

Guys don't like being losers so some of them decide it is the umpire's fault.

itsalreadybeenthrown · 2015-06-14T01:49:48+00:00

I never dated a jerk or a bad boy. I don't believe this a real "trend."

andrewisgood · 2015-06-14T01:50:33+00:00

Having been the nice guy type, I think a lot of it has to do with confidence, which has probably been brought up time and time again. Sometimes nice guys might lack that confidence and they might be shy in asking, or might be socially awkward, or whatever.

Superfluous_Toast · 2015-07-04T14:18:32+00:00

I prefer the nice guys honestly. But that's just me.

babybelly · 2015-06-13T17:17:34+00:00

I think nice guys give their niceness away for free so there is no incentive for women to work for it.

[deleted] · 2015-06-13T17:24:59+00:00

I honestly think that guys who aren't attractive pin themselves as the "nice guy" when someone who has worked out is the "bad boy".

In reality, that guy who worked out may be a "nice guy who is fit".

I mean there is truth with some women. And then not with others. Everyone has their types. Some want thugs and some want geeks. You'll know off the bat how they talk and how they dress.

[deleted] · 2015-06-13T17:50:54+00:00

I've never actually seen a "successful" jerk, ever, not even once, if we're talking about number of sex partners being the measure. In fact, I've only seen two long-term relationships with assholes among my age group, and both of the women in those relationships were severely depressed prior to entering the relationship.

Aside from that, I've only ever seen nice guys be the successful ones.

cvcv1991 · 2015-06-13T18:13:53+00:00

Nice guys are usually ugly, everybody ignores ugly people.

Smilingbluekitties · 2015-06-13T21:38:13+00:00

Cocky guys are more aggressive and they ask out more women. They tend to have more success because of the law of averages. That doesn't mean women prefer assholes.

TheChemist158 · 2015-06-13T19:45:36+00:00

I think that a lot of different things could be happening here. I don't that women going for abusive assholes over genuinely good guys happens a lot. A few women out there seem to like the bad boy asshole, or think they can change them. I've known very few women to regularly go for them. By large, I think the "abusive asshole" and "nice guy" are not so simple. The alleged asshole may be actually a decent dude that just rubs the nice guy the wrong way. The nice guy might be one of those typical nice guys that awkwardly do favors and get mad when not rewarded with sex. This is a bit of an extreme case, but I started chatting with a dude I met online. We'd play video games together, and he soon found I had a percent for dirty jokes. He also liked them, but they started to get less funny and more obscene, focusing on us. He even linked to a animal dildo online shop and asked me to pick a favorite. I told him straight up that I wasn't interested in him like that, and that the jokes were getting too real. Around this time I met my current boyfriend. He's a complete sweetheart and really loving and respectful. But he also has integrity and doesn't jump at the chance to do me favors or buy me things. Interestingly, the online friend complained of me following the old trope of picking the asshole over the nice guy. I think that something like this might be responsible for many cases. A Nice Guy that actually views women more like sex machine gets rejected for a decent guy that doesn't grovel.

haircombsnightmare · 2015-06-13T22:45:46+00:00

If this happens, it's generally when girls are teenagers. Happens to boys, too, which is rarely acknowledged here.

Title	Question for both pills: Do women ignore nice guys in favor of jerks and bad boys?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	9
Comments	130
Date	June 13, 2015 4:46 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/39py0z/question_for_both_pills_do_women_ignore_nice_guys/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/question-for-both-pills-do-women-ignore-nice-guys.281629 https://theredarchive.com/post/281629

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